Mentoring Minutes. Robin Cox

      Mentoring Minutes

      Weekly Messages to Encourage Anyone Guiding Youth

      Copyright © 2020 Robin Cox. All rights reserved. Except for brief quotations in critical publications or reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without prior written permission from the publisher. Write: Permissions, Wipf and Stock Publishers, 199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3, Eugene, OR 97401.

      Resource Publications

      An Imprint of Wipf and Stock Publishers

      199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3

      Eugene, OR 97401

      www.wipfandstock.com

      paperback isbn: 978-1-7252-6945-3

      hardcover isbn: 978-1-7252-6944-6

      ebook isbn: 978-1-7252-6946-0

      Manufactured in the U.S.A. August 19, 2020

      Also by Robin Cox

      The Mentoring Spirit of the Teacher—Inspiration, support and guidance for aspiring and practising teacher-mentors

      Expanding the Spirit of Mentoring—Simple steps and fun activities for a flourishing peer mentor or peer support program

      Nurturing the Spirit of Mentoring—50 fun activities for young people and for peer mentor training

      Encouraging the Spirit of Mentoring—50 fun activities for the ongoing training of teacher-mentors, volunteer mentors, student leaders, peer mentors and youth workers

      The Spirit of Mentoring—A manual for adult volunteers

      Letter 2 a Teen—Becoming the Best I can Be

      Making a Difference—The Teacher-Mentor, the Kids and the M.A.D Project

      7 Key Qualities of Effective Teachers: Encouragement for Christian Educators

      More information available at www.yess.co.nz

      To my grandchildren Abigail and Charlotte:

      with the hope that you will carry the spirit

      of mentoring throughout your lives.

      To all my trusted and valued mentors:

      thank you for believing in me, often pushing me

      out of my comfort zone,

      always encouraging and inspiring me

      to chase my dreams.

      Foreword

      Robin Cox has spent more than two decades teaching and writing about youth mentoring in Australia, New Zealand, and Africa. Mentoring Minutes is a powerful culmination of his research, personal experiences and knowledge of the journey of mentors and mentees and what is required to build and ensure a sustainable mentoring relationship.

      As a pioneer in the creation of school-based mentoring in America thirty-five years ago and an international consultant on mentoring, I have learned that dedicated, committed and caring mentors want to make a difference in the life of a young person but they cannot work in a vacuum. Much like their mentees, they must also feel supported, nurtured, inspired, and uplifted. Many programs are experiencing a high attrition rate among mentors. There may be many contributing factors but one my colleagues and I hear frequently is that the mentors are not sure if they are making a difference, sometimes feel isolated, and may not have adequate answers to their questions and concerns. They need to be reminded frequently that much of what they are experiencing with their mentee is normal, and be encouraged regularly not to give up.

      Mentoring Minutes in some respects has become an almost self-help book for mentors. In this regard, it is a unique and revolutionary approach. In the book, Cox offers an incredibly valuable resource for mentors as they celebrate the growth and achievements of their mentees. The daily messages become a calendar of ongoing training, advice, encouragement, and hope. Each message instructs mentors on mentees’ growth, development, feelings and needs and what they are experiencing as they go through the journey of life. Mentors are equipped with many tips and strategies to help mentees achieve their goals.

      Cox offers a plethora of ways to create meaningful mentoring relationships between mentors and mentees. One of my favorite quotes comes from Carl W. Buehner in 1971. “They may forget what you said—but they will never forget how you made them feel.” Mentoring Minutes is an instructional guide to making mentees feel self-worth, sense of belonging, get a better perspective on themselves, and the benefit of someone believing in them.

      On any given day, a mentor can read a daily message and find comfort and encouragement. Every message is an invitation to mentors not to be afraid to try new ideas and strategies with their mentees. Given that a mentor is a friend and not a teacher, psychologist, counselor, or parent, the Dos and Don’ts are sure to create boundaries and lead to successful mentoring. It is also convenient that due to the book’s intentional layout, the reader can enjoy a message or two at a time, select from the Table of Contents and be guided by the lessons. Mentors will be able to walk in their mentee’s shoes and support them as their number one cheerleader.

      Mentoring Minutes goes beyond the mentor/mentee audience. Most of the writings can be used as well by parents and teachers working with young people. The contents are practical and universal. The benefits to mentors and others remind me of a wonderful phrase in E.B. White’s Charlotte’s Web. “Why did you do all this for me?” Wilbur asked. Charlotte replied, “You have been my friend. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle.”

      I applaud Robin Cox for writing Mentoring Minutes. Mentors and mentees and others as well will be inspired and uplifted by his messages of support, challenge, love, and affirmation.

      Dr. Susan G. Weinberger

      President, Mentor Consulting Group, USA

      Preface

      A Mentor’s Dream

      A few years ago, I was asked what I would say to a young person to encourage them to reach their potential. This is what I wrote:

      My dream for you is that you wake up each morning, look at yourself in the mirror, love from the heart the person you see, always strive to be your unique self, and take a positive attitude into every day.

      My dream for you is that you build your life on strong foundations, so that you can withstand the inevitable storms of life, and remain a positive person.

      My dream for you is that you dare to dream big dreams, set realistic, achievable and measurable goals, fail sometimes, but remain determined to conquer adversity, and to discover, develop, and use your special gifts and talents to bring about a better community, a more caring society, a more compassionate world.

      My dream for you is that you often take time out to reflect on your progress, to visualize yourself ten years from now as a happy, proud, yet humble person, content with life, continually placing the interests of others before your own.

      My dream for you is that you discover the meaning of true love; that you sensibly risk entering into positive and meaningful relationships with others, and that your life is wonderfully enriched as a consequence.

      My dream for you is that you remember that you are a beautiful person both on the inside and the outside; that you have potential greatness within you, and that, as you leave your footprints on the sands of life’s journey, many will walk positively after you, and strive to emulate all that you achieve as a positive person of influence.

      My dream for you is that you always remember that you are a