The Heiress; a comedy, in five acts. Burgoyne John
The Heiress; a comedy, in five acts
REMARKS
The author of this play was an elegant writer, and a brave soldier – yet, as an author he had faults, and as a general failures. His life was eventful; and he appears to have had, among his other qualities, that of patient philosophy: or if, in the warmth of youth, or pride of manhood, he was ever elated by prosperity, it is certain he bore adversity with cheerful resignation; that adversity, which is more formidable to the ambitious, than poverty to the luxurious – disappointment of expected renown.
Secret love, and clandestine marriage, composed the first acts of that tragi-comedy, called his life. His cultivated mind, and endearing manners, reconciled, in a short time, the noble house of Derby to his stolen union with Lady Charlotte Stanley: her father, the late Earl of Derby, acknowledged him for his son-in-law; while the present Earl considered him, not only as his uncle, but his friend1.
The author was, at that period, but a subaltern in the army. The patronage of his new relations, more than his own merit, it is probable, obtained him higher rank. He was, however, possessed of talents for a general, and those talents were occasionally rewarded with success. But his misfortunes in battle have been accompanied by circumstances more memorable than his victories – the latter were but of slight or partial consequence; his defeat at Saratoga was of great and direful import.
He sent an able, and most pathetic account, from America, of the surrender of his whole army – it was correctly written, and the style charmed every reader – but he had better have beaten the enemy, and mis-spelt every word of his dispatch; for so, probably, the great Duke of Marlborough would have done, both by one and the other.
General Burgoyne appears to have been a man capable of performing all things that did not require absolute genius. He was complete in mediocrity, A valiant, but not always a skilful, soldier; an elegant, but sometimes an insipid, writer.
When the comedy of "The Heiress" was first acted, it was compared, and preferred by some persons, to "The School for Scandal." It attracted vast sums of money from the east, as well as the west part of the metropolis; – but was more justly appreciated when the season of acting was over, and the playhouses closed.
Still, it is a production which claims high respect, from a degree of refinement which pervades the whole work; from the peculiar situation of its author; and from other circumstances closely connected with its performance on the stage. – "The Heiress" is dedicated to the Earl of Derby; and the present Countess of Derby was the Lady Emily of the drama when it was first acted.
The author, in his Preface, has, with much art, paid a deference to Miss Farren, by a compliment separate from her brother and sister performers; at the same time, wisely taking care not to excite their jealousy, while he soothed the partiality of his noble relation. He thanks and praises her merely for speaking his Epilogue, in which, of course, no other performer had a claim to his acknowledgments.
Lieutenant General Burgoyne is the author of another comedy, called "The Maid of the Oaks," and the excellent farce of "Bon Ton." – He was enamoured of the stage, and was at a play, in the little theatre of the Haymarket, the night previous to that on which he died suddenly, in the summer of 1792.
He was a Privy Counsellor, Colonel of the 4th regiment of foot, and Member of Parliament for Preston, in Lancashire. He had held many offices of great emolument; but having resigned them all about the time he wrote this comedy, he was at length rather a confirmation of, than an exception to, the adage – an author is seldom wealthy.
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
ACT THE FIRST
SCENE I
A Lady's Apartment.
Mr. Blandish and Mrs. Letitia Blandish discovered writing: Letters folded up, and Message Cards scattered upon the Table.
Mrs. Blandish leans upon her Elbows, as meditating; writes, as pleased with her Thought; lays down the Pen.
Mrs. Blandish. There it is, complete —
Adieu, my charming friend, my amiable, my all
Accomplished associate! conceive the ardour of
Your lovers united with your own sensibility —
Still will the compound be but faintly expressive
Of the truth and tenderness of your
There's phrase – there's a period – match it, if you can.
Blandish. Not I, indeed: I am working upon a quite different plan: but, in the name of the old father of adulation, to whom is that perfect phrase addressed?
Mrs. Blandish. To one worth the pains, I can tell you – Miss Alscrip.
Blandish. What, sensibility to Miss Alscrip! My dear sister, this is too much, even in your own way: had you run changes upon her fortune, stocks, bonds, and mortgages; upon Lord Gayville's coronet at her feet, or forty other coronets, to make footballs of if she pleased, – it would have been plausible; but the quality you have selected —
Mrs. Blandish. Is one she has no pretensions to; therefore the flattery is more persuasive – that's my maxim.
Blandish. And mine also, but I don't try it quite so high – Sensibility to Miss Alscrip! you might as well have applied it to her uncle's pig-iron, from which she derives her first fifty thousand; or the harder heart of the old usurer, her father, from which she expects the second. But come, [Rings.] to the business of the morning.
Here, Prompt – send out the chairman with the billets and cards. – Have you any orders, madam?
Mrs. Blandish. [Delivering her Letter.] This to Miss Alscrip, with my impatient inquiries after her last night's rest, and that she shall have my personal salute in half an hour. – You take care to send to all the lying-in ladies?
Prompt. At their doors, madam, before the first load of straw.
Blandish. And to all great men that keep the house – whether for their own disorders, or those of the nation?
Prompt. To all, sir – their secretaries, and principal clerks.
Blandish. [Aside to Prompt.] How goes on the business you have undertaken for Lord Gayville?
Prompt. I have conveyed his letter, and expect this morning to get an answer.
Blandish. He does not think me in the secret?
Prompt. Mercy forbid you should be!
Blandish. I should never forgive your meddling.
Prompt. Oh! never, never!
Blandish. [Aloud.] Well, dispatch —
Mrs. Blandish. Hold! – apropos, to the lying-in list – at Mrs. Barbara Winterbloom's, to inquire after the Angola kittens, and the last hatch of Java sparrows.
Prompt. [Reading his Memorandum as he goes out.] Ladies in the straw – ministers, &c. – old maids, cats, and sparrows: never had a better list of how d'ye's, since I had the honour to collect for the Blandish family.
Mrs. Blandish. These are the attentions that establish valuable friendships in female life. By adapting myself to the whims of one, submitting to the jest of another, assisting the little plots of a third, and taking part against the husbands with all, I am become an absolute essential in the polite world; the very soul of every fashionable party in town or country.
Blandish. The country! Pshaw! Time thrown away.
Mrs. Blandish. Time thrown away! As if women of fashion left London,
The late Earl of Derby was grandfather to the present Earl, his son having died before him.