The Beautiful Widow. HELEN BROOKS
live?’ Steel asked after a moment or two, his gaze running over her slender shape.
Toni froze for a moment. Naturally slim, she knew she was too thin at the moment and her clothes were hanging on her and immediately took the question as a subtle criticism. She’d had to alter the waistband of the skirt she had on that morning, and although her white silk shirt was supposed to be loose it didn’t fit her as it had when she’d bought it a year ago. Sleepless nights spent worrying over the last four months had taken their toll. She took a sip of champagne and nerved herself to look into the handsome face. ‘I like food so I suppose the former. Yes, definitely the former.’
He grinned. ‘Me too.’
The beat of sexual awareness that vibrated through her veins almost caused her to drop the champagne flute. Horrified at herself, she prayed frantically he hadn’t noticed. It had been that smile, the way it had mellowed the hard planes and angles of his face and crinkled the silver-blue eyes. But he was her boss, well, practically. And she was in his world now. A world where sophisticated, worldly men and women could share a meal and eat and drink and converse as colleagues and nothing more. Besides which, if she ever got involved with another man in the whole of her life it would be too soon. All she wanted was to bring up the girls the best she could after she cleared the mountain of debts Richard had left. They were her life now and there was no room for anyone else, not that a man like Steel Landry would remotely be interested in a widow with two small children in tow.
The conversation was inconsequential while they ate and she found Steel had a wickedly dry wit, his observations on day-to-day life turning fairly mundane happenings into something hysterically funny. He had it all, she thought as she savoured the marinated chilli and ginger steaks Maggie had brought for the next course. Looks, personality, wealth. Women would throw themselves at him till the day he died; he was that sort of man. How would a girlfriend or wife cope with that? They would have to be very sure of their own worth and of him too, but could you ever be sure of someone like Steel Landry?
Dessert was a frothy chocolate concoction with a raspberry sauce that was tangy and complemented the rich chocolate perfectly, and by the end of the meal Toni was very full and more relaxed. But only up to a point. Steel simply wasn’t the sort of man you could relax around—or maybe she should say the sort of man she could relax around, she acknowledged silently. He was too … disturbing.
Maggie had gone home once she had brought out the dessert and coffee, and now Toni said, ‘Maggie’s a wonderful cook. Has she worked for you long?’
He nodded. ‘A good few years. She comes in most afternoons and prepares an evening meal unless I’m going out, and sees to the apartment and laundry and so on. Her husband died shortly before she came to work for me and left her fairly well off, but she likes to keep busy. She looks after one of her grandchildren every morning so the hours here suit her.’
Toni thought back to the motherly way Maggie had with her. ‘She likes to feel needed.’
The observation seemed to surprise him. ‘Needed?’ He considered this for a moment. ‘Yes, I suppose you’re right, I hadn’t looked at it like that. She was very happily married, by all accounts, so I suppose it must have been hard when her husband died, especially as it was a long illness and she nursed him herself. She’s a good person.’
And devoted to Steel, by the way she’d fussed round him. Which had to mean he wasn’t quite the hard, remote, slightly sardonic mogul he presented to the world?
Or maybe it didn’t. She didn’t know, Toni thought confusedly, what Steel was, and she didn’t need to. She was an employee, that was all. She finished the last of her coffee, feeling acutely awkward as she said, ‘That was a lovely meal and all the nicer for being so unexpected. Thank you.’
‘My pleasure.’ The firm, sensual mouth suddenly quirked with amusement as he added, ‘See the lengths I’ve gone to to make you relax?’
She giggled, she couldn’t help it, the first real natural response she’d made all evening, then felt acutely embarrassed as the silver eyes narrowed on her mouth.
‘That’s better,’ he murmured, ‘but don’t tense up on me again. Let’s go and sort out those plans and the other bits and pieces before I call a taxi.’
‘Oh, you needn’t do that,’ she said quickly. ‘I came by underground and—’
‘And you’re going home with me in a taxi.’
With him? This was getting worse. ‘I’ve got my ticket—’
‘I’m going to call the hospital for an update and then a cab, OK? I have never yet left any young woman I was responsible for to make her own way home, and I don’t intend to start with you, Toni.’
She stared at him. ‘You’re not responsible for me.’
‘You came here early this evening because I asked you to and you stayed for a meal for the same reason. It is now—’ he consulted his watch ‘—getting on for eleven, and soon all the gremlins and goblins come out to play. Indulge me.’
He was light-hearted, casual, but she couldn’t rise to the humour. ‘Really, there’s no need.’
‘Yes, there is.’ The silver eyes fixed her determinedly.
Oh, for goodness’ sake! ‘Thank you,’ she said. Not.
‘I’d drive myself but I’ve had a drink,’ he added, rising to his feet as though the matter was settled. ‘Now come along.’
Toni stood up. She felt she couldn’t do anything else but she found she really didn’t want to ride home with him in a taxi. They’d shared a meal, admittedly, but on opposite sides of the table. A taxi was altogether more … She baulked at the word intimate and substituted cosy.
Fifteen minutes later she was sitting in a cab on her way home to Finsbury clutching her portfolio to her chest. Steel was sprawled beside her taking a good two-thirds of the seat, his long legs stretched in front of him and his whole persona one of lazy relaxation as he went over a few key points of the project.
Toni tried to concentrate, she really did, but she was acutely aware of a hard male thigh against hers, the five-o’clock stubble on his chin, which accentuated his brand of aggressive masculinity tenfold, and, not least, the bigness of him. The hard muscled shoulders were broad in keeping with his height, but it was more the overall virility of the man that was so disturbing. And attractive. And definitely scary.
Oh, she didn’t doubt those worldly, sophisticated women a man like Steel would date would be able to handle his fascination just fine. But she was neither worldly nor sophisticated, she admitted feverishly, wishing the journey would end. Before Richard she had never slept with a man before. Lots of her boyfriends had tried to go all the way, of course, but that wasn’t how she had been brought up. She hadn’t minded kissing and petting, she was as red-blooded as the next woman, but she’d always known she would need to be in love before she committed herself body, soul and spirit. It was just the way she was made and that was that. She’d done apologising for the fact long before Richard had come across the horizon. It hadn’t taken her long to understand that the male sex worked on quite another agenda, however. Most of them didn’t need to do more than like a woman before they indulged in anything and everything, no holds barred. And some of them simply refused to compute the word no.
But Richard had been understanding and prepared to wait. He’d assured her that one-night stands and casual sex weren’t on his agenda either, and he had charmed her down the aisle before she had recognised he was essentially a terribly weak and flawed individual. But even then, when her love had turned to lukewarm affection and she had realised she was always going to have to be the strong one in the relationship, the one who carried the family and made all the important decisions, she still hadn’t known about his addiction. He had been cunning enough to keep that dark side of his life from her completely, so maybe he had been stronger than she’d thought?
To her acute discomfort she came out of the maelstrom of memories to find Steel