There’s A Hippo In My Cistern: One Man’s Misadventures on the Eco-Frontline. Pete May

There’s A Hippo In My Cistern: One Man’s Misadventures on the Eco-Frontline - Pete  May


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      Collins

      An imprint of HarperCollins Publishers

      1 London Bridge Street

      London SE1 9GF

       www.harpercollins.co.uk

      Published in 2008 by HarperCollins Publishers Ltd

      Text copyright © Pete May 2008

      Pete May asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work

      A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

      All reasonable efforts have been made by the author and the publisher to trace the copyright owners of the material quoted in this book. In the event that the author or publisher are notified of any mistakes or omissions by copyright owners after publication of this book, the author and the publisher will endeavour to rectify the position accordingly for any subsequent printings.

      Extract on page from Loaded reprinted with permission of IPC Media Limited. Copyright © Martin Deeson/ Loaded/ IPC+ Syndication 1996.

      Extract on page from ‘Scandal of National Lotto-Tree’ reprinted with permission of NI Syndication. Copyright © The Sun 27.05.1997.

      Extract on page from ‘Apocalypse Now’ reprinted with permission of George Monbiot. Copyright © George Monbiot 1999.

      Extract on page from ‘Climate Change Science: Adapt, Mitigate, or Ignore?’ from David King, SCIENCE 303:176-177 (2004)’ reprinted with permission of AAAS.

      Extract on page from Ken Livingstone 07/07 speech reprinted with kind permission of the Mayor’s office.

      All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

      HarperCollinsPublishers has made every reasonable effort to ensure that any picture content and written content in this ebook has been included or removed in accordance with the contractual and technological constraints in operation at the time of publication.

      Source ISBN 9780007264315

      Ebook Edition © JANUARY 2015 ISBN: 9780007282104

      Version: 2015-01-08

       For NLB – who changed my climate

      A Hippo is an inflatable plastic bag that is placed inside a toilet’s cistern to conserve water.

      CONTENTS

       Cover

       Title Page

       Chapter 5 That’s Yer Allotment

       Chapter 6 Walking Class Hero

       Chapter 7 Green Baby

       Chapter 8 Castaway 2001

       Chapter 9 Lord of the Fruit Flies

       Chapter 10 Greener Than Thou

       Chapter 11 Clucking Hell

       Chapter 12 Reclutter Your Life

       Chapter 13 Indecent Proposal

       Chapter 14 It’s a Nice Day for a Green Wedding

       Postscript The Importance of Being Earnest

       Acknowledgements

       About the Publisher

       Don’t Ever Date an Eco-Bunny

      The last months of 1993 are for me a kind of male nirvana. My short-life flat in Elephant and Castle certainly smells like team spirit. Shin pads drying above the gas fire, footie shorts on the back of the kitchen chair. My ideal weekend starts with Friday night TV and the blokeish repartee of Have I Got News For You and Fantasy Football. Saturday it’s down the Hammers, Match of the Day in the evening and on Sunday, five-a-side beneath the Westway.

      Division One has become the Premiership and Sky has begun to televise live matches on a Sunday, ideal for a post-game pint in the boozer. It is possible to spend an entire weekend watching and playing football. It feels a bit like being Arthur Seaton in Alan Sillitoe’s Saturday Night and Sunday Morning. Arthur couldn’t believe that after post-war austerity he could now drink endless pints of beer and mugs of tea and knock off a married bird; here in Elephant I can’t believe there’s football almost every day on the telly.

      By day I’m ‘Sidelines’, the gossip columnist for Time Out magazine


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