How to Divide Your Family's Estate and Heirlooms Peacefully & Sensibly. Julie Ph.D. Hall
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HOW TO DIVIDE YOUR FAMILY’S ESTATE AND HEIRLOOMS PEACEFULLY AND SENSIBLY
A No-Nonsense, Solutions-Based Guide
for Equitable Distribution
By Julie Hall
The Estate Lady®
The Estate Lady Publications
6420-A1 Rea Road #135, Charlotte NC 28277
704.543.1051
Credits:
Domna V. Colepaugh, Assistant
© 2011 Julie Hall, The Estate Lady®. All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means – electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning or other – without the prior written permission of the publisher.
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ISBN-13: 978-0-9844-1913-5
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please contact The Estate Lady at 704.543.1051 or at [email protected]
For all my clients–
past, present and future.
Thank you for sharing your lives so I could
learn how to serve you in a greater capacity.
About the Author
Julie Hall, author of The Boomer Burden, Dealing With Your Parent’s Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff, and A Boomer's Guide To Cleaning Out Your Parents' Estate in 30 Days or Less, is an estate expert that specializes in personal property. As owner and operator of The Estate Lady®, LLC, which offers turnkey estate dissolution services, she brings eighteen years of experience to families facing the overwhelming task of sorting through and emptying their parents’ home. Her expertise is called upon for consulting, conducting on-site estate sales, appraising personal property, and organizing the removal and disposal of contents in the most appropriate way.
In addition to her responsibilities as The Estate Lady®, Julie’s passion for helping as many distressed families as possible deal with the challenges of estate dissolution inspired her to take ownership of the American Society of Estate Liquidators® (ASEL) in 2007. As director of ASEL, her vision is to dedicate the organization to being an educational and referral resource to estate liquidation professionals nationwide. Today, ASEL offers educational courses, resources, products, and support to industry professionals and those interested in becoming estate liquidators.
A popular speaker to groups dealing with older adult issues and estate accumulation challenges, she is also an expert author on many senior and boomer websites, answering questions about appraisals, downsizing, and family matters. Her work has been published in The Wall Street Journal, Bloomberg News, MSN Money, LA Times, etc, and she is called upon by people worldwide for her sound advice.
In 2007, The Estate Lady®, LLC was selected by StartupNation as one of the top three home-based businesses in the United States in its Boomers Back in Business category.
Julie is a member of the Certified Appraisers Guild of America, the National Speakers Association, the National Association of Women Business Owners, and the Better Business Bureau. Julie resides in Charlotte, North Carolina, with her family.
For more information, please visit Julie’s websites: www.TheEstateLady.com, www.ASELonline.com, www.TheBoomerBurden.com, or her blog at http://estatelady.wordpress.com.
Introduction
With all my years in the estate industry, the one thing I kept hearing over and over is how my boomer clients wish they had a simple, step-by-step, “how to” guide to point them in the right direction after beloved parents become infirm and/or pass away. I have dedicated my career to being a resource for clients and empowering them with knowledge to take on the overwhelming responsibility of dividing a loved one's personal assets, but to do so with little or no fighting, and making sense of the madness.
I want you to be prepared for what’s coming. There is much to do both before and after parents leave us. When the entire family understands the roles of heir and executor, and grasps the idea that this doesn’t have to be a vicious process, dividing the estate will become more orderly and fair. I hope this guide will act as a friendly hand to hold during the process.
This guide is complimentary to my other books, The Boomer Burden – Dealing With Your Parents’ Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff, and A Boomer's Guide To Cleaning Out Your Parents' Estate in 30 Days or Less, available on Amazon and major booksellers. The Boomer Burden hit #1 in several different categories, and its reviews are tremendous. People email me from all over the world thanking me for writing it. With 100+ million of us needing this guidance, I would recommend picking up these books if you have not yet done so. If you have already read it, this guide is an additional resource and will act as a working manual to put in your purse or briefcase to check things off as you go.
My goal is to make this daunting process as simple as possible for you, while giving you the tools you need to divide the estate equitably. You need a quick-reference, easy to understand, easy to follow guide that provides you with peace of mind and keeps it “simple.”
I know this guide will offer you trustworthy guidance and lighten your load during this very challenging time in your life.
Section I
Getting Started: Principles for Dividing Your Parents’ Estate
KNOWLEDGE IS POWER AND PEACE OF MIND
Being prepared and fully understanding what you are about to get into is a significant step towards assuring the process of dividing your parents’ estate is one that brings your family closer together versus tearing it apart. The fact that you have purchased this guide, or that it was given to you, will give you the knowledge you need, so you can do the best possible job under these extenuating circumstances.
Following are some fundamental principles which are crucial to understand before you begin. These will ensure that the process is manageable and fair for everyone.
The Decedent has the First Right to Speak.
Is there a valid will or trust? Are there specific bequests included with those documents? What’s written in the will and other final documents guides this entire process. Often heirs squabble because nothing was written or documented; it becomes a matter of "Mom said I could have that" or "Dad always wanted me to have this." If mom or dad said that and no one else had knowledge they said it, it becomes a tug of war which ultimately leads to a tug of hearts.
Unfortunately, a verbal bequest is hearsay and does not have the validity of a written document; sometimes even a written document's validity is questioned. Many of my clients intentionally gift heirlooms and other possessions while they are still alive, which will relieve much of the pressure to divide after the loved one passes away.