Tell Me about When Moms and Dads Go to Jail. Judi Goozh
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Tell Me about When
Moms and Dads
Go to Jail
Judi Goozh and Sue Jeweler
We dedicate this book to the children with an incarcerated parent and their families, who struggle each and every day, and to the professionals who are dedicated to helping them through difficult times.
We also dedicate this book to our families—our husbands, Paul and Larry, and our children and grandchildren.
Acknowledgments
Our journey on behalf of children with an incarcerated parent has been guided and supported by many. In 2007, our mentor, Art Wallenstein, who was the Director of Maryland’s Montgomery County Department of Correction and Rehabilitation, made it possible to create a project to raise awareness about this often-overlooked and underserved population. Robert Green, as warden of Maryland’s Montgomery County Clarksburg Facility (MCCF), offered great support as well. Kendra Jochum, LCSW-C Reentry Services Manager at MCCF, worked tirelessly and made incredible contributions to this effort. Randall Wylie provided the important photographs from MCCF that show the reality of jail so that children can see the real-life, real-world situation for a parent. From the beginning, Dr. Craig Uchida saw the importance of this issue and offered us tremendous support and continues his own work for children with an incarcerated parent. Jeff Franklin and Archie Coates, creators of PlayLab, Inc., have been with us every step of the way to give our writing an appropriate visual format. Cindy Perlis, Director of Art for Recovery for the UCSF Comprehensive Cancer Center at Mount Zion, gave us her creative insight and guidance on these books.
James Cherry, Editor at Jessica Kingsley Publishers, Ltd., gave us a fabulous home for our work. His enthusiastic support for this book has been an inspiration. His warmth and professionalism have been stellar and we thank him for the opportunity to highlight issues for children with an incarcerated parent. Editorial Assistant Daisy Watt has shown patience and support throughout the entire process of publication.
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To the Reader
This book will help you understand what is happening to your mom or dad who goes to jail.
Tell Me about When Moms and Dads Go to Jail tells a story about a child like you who finds out that Dad has been arrested and is in jail. You may have many questions about what will happen and, throughout the story, these questions are answered.
Moms are arrested and go to jail, too. Even though the story is about a child and a dad, the same story, questions, and answers are true if your mom goes to jail.
You may have a lot of different feelings about the situation, from sadness, worry and confusion to anger and not wanting to be with anyone. All your emotions are normal. Feelings are not right or wrong—they just are!
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Tell Me about When
Moms and Dads
Go to Jail
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We were out walking. A police car stopped and looked at my dad. Soon there were lots of police cars and flashing lights. I was scared. I wondered what was happening.
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The police officers talked to my dad. They put handcuffs on him like in the movies and put him in the back seat of a police car. Another police officer talked to Mom. A police officer asked me questions. I felt confused.
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Where is Dad going? I wondered if they would take Mom, too. Who would take care of me? Will I have to live with Grandma? When will Dad come back?
We went home. Dad didn’t come back. I didn’t say goodbye or hug or kiss him. I felt sad and worried. I love Dad. I don’t know where he went. He just disappeared.
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Where was Dad? I was afraid. Mom said that Dad did something really bad and he had to go in the police car to jail. She said he might not come back for a while.
I couldn’t sleep. I had very bad dreams all night. There were questions floating in my head.
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Why do people go to jail? Mom said that in school and at home, you have rules to follow. Listen to your teachers. Don’t hurt anyone. Don’t take things that belong to someone else.
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Grown-ups have rules, too. They are called laws. You cannot drive until you pass a test to have a driver’s license. You cannot hurt children. You cannot steal. You cannot fight.
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Mom also told me that when you make a mistake in school or at home and do not follow the rules, there are consequences or punishments. For example, you might get a time out. You might need to tell the other person you are sorry. You cannot watch TV or play with your toys.
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When grown-ups don’t follow the rules and laws, there are big consequences or punishments. When grown-ups don’t do what a law says, they might have to go to jail.
Laws keep us all safe. We need to follow the rules and laws.
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Dad is in jail. He broke the law and has to face the consequences. I feel so sad.
Mom told me lots of things about jail.
What does jail look like? The jail is a big building with lots of rooms and gates that open and close. There is a big wire fence around the building. The people who are sent to jail live there until they are released.
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Where does he sleep? Everyone lives in a cell. It is a small room with a bed, a shelf, a sink, a toilet, and a desk. He sleeps on a bunk bed, with a bed on the bottom and a bed on top. He might even have to share the room with someone else.
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Where does he eat?