"Pray for Me". Kenneth H. Carter Jr.

      “Pray for Me”

      For twenty-eight years I have been a pastor in local congregations. Besides the recurring pattern of the Christian year, celebrations of Christmas and Easter, weddings, memorial services, visitation of the sick, and confirmation classes, the request for intercessory prayer is a constant.

      On the way out of a service, an elderly man will say quietly, “Please pray for my wife”; an e-mail message arrives: “Please pray for my sister who lives in another state.” Or the request may be more direct: “Pray for me. I have a real challenge ahead.”

      I have always responded that I would pray. But in reality, and in hindsight, my actual response was at times perfunctory: a fleeting thought or just writing down a name on a page, to give to others later. The motivation to write this book came in part from what seemed my own pastoral failure—I was being asked for spiritual help and attention, but I was not giving the request the engagement it merited.

      Even more troubling was the knowledge that many expect the ordained—those set apart—to have the expertise and the time to provide this spiritual support. Intercessory prayer is not exclusive to ordained persons—we share intercession with all of God’s people, and you may be reading this book because you are a gifted intercessor or feel called to pray for others. But it was this concern as a pastor that prompted me to take intercession more seriously.

      Here I will share some of what I have learned so that you may be more prepared when someone says to you, “Pray for me.”

      The Bucket

      The words Pray for me signal a person in need. And when someone is in need—because of illness, a broken relationship, loss of work, a spiritual crisis, or grief, it is as if he or she is carrying a heavy bucket—a bucket filled with emotion, filled with grief, filled with confusion, filled with disappointment.

      I learned about the bucket image from a pastor friend. We come from different denominations but share an interest in equipping people to care for one another and to draw nearer to God in retreat settings. This powerful image of the bucket has elucidated intercessory prayer for me.

      A person in need or in grief is carrying around this bucket of emotion. An intercessor is one who comes alongside that individual with an empty bucket. The person in need gives his or her agenda to the intercessor, and the intercessor receives that agenda as the work of God, namely prayer. Intercession is carried out by those with enough space in their lives to include the needs of others: family, friends, congregations, communities, and the world.

      Emptying Ourselves

      Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus,

       who, though he was in the form of God,

       did not regard equality with God

       as something to be exploited,

       but emptied himself,

       taking the form of a slave,

       being born in human likeness.

       And being found in human form,

       he humbled himself

       and became obedient to the point of death—

       even death on a cross.—Philippians 2:5-8

      Intercessors