Refuel Your Wait. Laci Richter

      Refuel Your Wait

      Find Hope and Overcome Fear While Adopting

      Copyright © 2020 Laci Richter. All rights reserved. Except for brief quotations in critical publications or reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without prior written permission from the publisher. Write: Permissions, Wipf and Stock Publishers, 199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3, Eugene, OR 97401.

      Resource Publications

      An Imprint of Wipf and Stock Publishers

      199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3

      Eugene, OR 97401

      www.wipfandstock.com

      paperback isbn: 978-1-7252-7526-3

      hardcover isbn: 978-1-7252-7527-0

      ebook isbn: 978-1-7252-7528-7

      Manufactured in the U.S.A. 09/17/20

      Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, a Division of Tyndale House Ministries, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

      Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The “NIV” and “New International Version” are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

      Scripture quotations marked (TLB) are taken from The Living Bible copyright © 1971. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, a Division of Tyndale House Ministries, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

      Random House Kernerman Webster’s College Dictionary, © 2010 K Dictionaries Ltd. Copyright 2005, 1997, 1991 by Random House, Inc. All rights reserved.

      To all those who are waiting.

      Preface

      Refuel Your Wait is the story of how I was able to find hope and peace in the process of becoming a parent through adoption.

      As a girl from South Louisiana my well-meaning family was alarmed at the fact that I remained single and unspoken for as I quickly approached the age of thirty. Thankfully, in early 2005, just in the nick of time, I stumbled upon and met the man who quickly became my husband. We had a whirlwind courtship that included a move across the country after a year into our relationship. My family also became alarmed at this move with no sign of a wedding ring on my finger. In 2008, we married and my well-meaning family became my husband’s well-meaning family also.

      In 2010, after appreciating life as a couple with plenty of travel, abundant excursions, and generous dinners at nice restaurants, we decided it was time to start a family. In 2012, after one year of trying to conceive naturally and then one year of fertility treatments, we chose to move on to the adoption process. We had discussions early in our marriage that if we couldn’t conceive for any reason we would adopt. Some of our very dear friends had built their family by adoption and we mistakenly thought we knew a bit about the process. It was a natural and easy decision for us.

      It was during our adoption wait that God decided to speak directly to me. As he and I were early on in our relationship, it took me some time to recognize his voice. I imagined God’s voice would be a scary and booming sound cutting through silence. And I have to tell you, prior to my personal experience, if someone claimed they were spoken to by God, I probably stopped listening pretty quickly. But then I heard him, and his voice wasn’t weird or scary or booming.

      My Heavenly Father, who knows me very well, spoke to me delicately and gracefully. Early one morning in the fall of 2012, I awoke from a dream with a specific date lingering in my thoughts. The date was April 10. I remember no other details of the dream besides the specific date and my deceased grandfather being present. I searched my memory to find the significance of the date as it may pertain to my grandfather, but it didn’t. I almost discarded the thought but decided to journal about it instead. You know, in case God was speaking to me. I shared the experience with my husband and a few close friends. After a while, the experience started to fade away as life and the waiting continued.

      About six months later on April 9, 2013, we received the call that every adoptive family is impatiently waiting for. That call was our agency telling us about an expectant mother who was making an adoption plan and wanted to meet us. And on April 10–the date in my dream–we met the woman who chose us to parent her unborn child. God spoke to me with a dream, a date, and confirmation that this was the child we would parent. It would be a long seventeen weeks before the baby was born and the expectant mother’s decision was final. Even with this confirmation from my Heavenly Father, the waiting experience was a test of faith.

      Refuel Your Wait is our story of a challenging waiting season filled with many fears along with the Scriptures that personally gave me hope and ultimately joy.

      Acknowledgements

      To my daughters’ birth parents. Our wait was nothing compared to the decisions you chose to make in what was most likely the toughest season of your lives. To put your child’s future and well-being above your own by placing them for adoption was painful and courageous. I am reminded of your grief and your pride running through my home on a daily basis.

      To my daughters, even though I have to remind you every morning that you are not allowed in my writing office, I love hearing your little feet come down the stairs and head directly toward me. I pray you have memories of morning snuggles in front of my computer and know that I was working on sharing the story of how you joined our family.

      To my husband, Robbie, thank you for being the leader of “Team Richter.” I appreciate your technical support but more importantly your family support. You are the smartest, funniest, most composed person I know. Just having you in the room with me brings me peace and creativity.

      To my fellow author, mentor, editor and friend, Damaris, without your experience and words of encouragement this book may have sat on my computer for another three years. Thank you for reviewing my words so that I could experience a preview of how my readers would receive them.

      To my friends, Tammie and Brad, without your demands for a book after every word I posted online, this book may have sat in my head or in my notebook forever.

      To my Alabama Bible study group, without your lessons about the Holy Spirit’s role in my life I may have ignored the nudge to journal the process.

      Introduction

      Courage [kur-ij] noun the quality of mind and spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery.

      The majority of our lives we are waiting for something. We wait for the right job, a suitable partner, a successful pregnancy, an appropriate move, a timely friendship. We wait for phone calls and emails. We wait for the healing of a loved one or ourselves. We wait for pain to pass and grief to resign. We wait for conventional happiness and expected joy. Because our lives surround waiting, it is important to decide how we will wait. We can choose to wait in fear or we can choose to wait with hope.

      When we use the wisdom of a bigger picture to guide our daily interactions and prayer, we choose to wait in courage. We can choose to spin in worry of details that are out of our control. Or we can choose to surrender our wait to the mercy of God’s promises. His Word and promises will fill us up and renew our strength and energy with exactly what we need. And when we find ourselves empty again, we will cry out for more strength, more peace, more of his fatherly love. If and when we seek more, he will provide