The American College of Switzerland Zoo. James E. Henderson
studs’ support, a constitution was quickly drafted and offered to the administration for review. The organizers got around the Greek problem by declaring “The Association” a non-Greek sophomore fraternity. With the administration’s buy-in, the stage was set for yet another party, of course! This was to be a formal signing party with the school president, the Gut, the student council president, Willie, and all the sophomores and dates.
Dates… I only knew a couple of girls, and Dee Dee was avoiding me. Well, I’m not sure that she ever even looked at me as more than a beast of burden. And Sam… well, I wasn’t sure about her after her sloshing drunk lets-roll-down-the-hill, routine. Besides, she had been drunk enough that she might not even remember me. Walking into the main building worried that I might end up the only one at the party without a date, I ran into Kaeti coming out.
“You look lost in thought,” she said, catching me by surprise.
“It’s just that – wait! – ah… we… the Association, are having a formal dinner to mark the signing of…” I stammered.
“Sure, sounds like fun! When?”
“Great! Ah… Saturday – Did I mention it was formal?” I have a date! Shear blind luck!
The signing party was fun – good food and wine! Roark played his guitar. Is there anything that guy can’t do?! Kaeti looked great in her long light-blue dress, although her heels made her a good inch taller than me. Her long hair looked silky as it glowed gold in the candlelight and set off her hazel eyes in a bewitching combination. Tiny came with Pam, a round-faced young lady with shoulder-length red hair and a hefty chest! More than a mouthful is a waste, I thought. – Well, Tiny has a pretty big mouth! Pam makes Kaeti look like a boy – no, that isn’t fair; Kaeti looks beautiful and feminine tonight. With the formal signing of the constitution, we now had control of our frat house. The evening quickly wound down, and a perfunctory kiss at the girls’ dorm steps let me know that Kaeti was just a friend. At the same time, I owed her a big favor. She had saved me from the certain embarrassment of not being able to find a date to the party.
The Association wasted no time in assigning priorities: Girls, booze, and party, PARTY, PARTY! Bob did take time to “hire” the janitor who already worked at the building and to get a sign made changing the dorm’s name from Florimont, or flowery mountain, hardly the name for a masculine fraternity, to Helvatia House. Helvatia had something to do with the early Swiss people and really appealed to the administration – but “Hell House” had a better ring among the frat brothers. (Willie, again? Maybe…) Yes, Wilds and I were frat brothers, hard to believe! A scarecrow and a short Quaker!
Not a week passed before our inaugural party, a Purple Passion party! The paint wasn’t dry on our sign! Jolie and Stallone went to work on the drink, Purple Passion. It was supposed to be a mixture of grape juice, gin, and white lightning. Unfortunately, Switzerland was not known for white lightning, so vodka was substituted. The formula was one gallon of grape juice for every half-gallon of gin and half-gallon of vodka. In theory, one could taste the gin but not the vodka; therefore, the drink tasted a little strong but not strong enough to be deadly. In reality, the stuff was deadly! To add to the effect, apples and oranges were cut up and floated in the mixture hours before the party. The hope was that the fruit would ferment and add to the alcohol. It didn’t work, but the fruit added color and caused an unexpected effect for those of us who were trying to stay sober. Gallons of the deadly drink were mixed together in a trashcan with a plastic liner.
Sometime the week before, I had run into Sam at school, and she had thanked me for my help on the way back from the Fondue party. Great timing! I mentioned the party, and she said she would love to go! I had a date! That evening, I met Sam at the main building. She looked very cute, but her heels brought her up to my height when she stood straight. Fortunately for me, she did that rarely. Her outfit didn’t look practical for the shortcut to our frat house, so we walked back and forth through the streets of the village.
The party was in our house parlor. The parlor was on the second, well, European first, floor, and should have been the center of dorm life; but that tended to be Le Nord, so the parlor had been converted into a workout room of sorts. Stallone had supplied a basic set of weights and handgrips. Someone else had contributed a Bullwoerker, a strange contraption sold on TV and in the back of “Popular Science” magazine. You could do a half-dozen exercises with it, but it got boring quickly. Stallone had shown me some exercises designed to beef up my upper arms and a sit-up designed to destroy my spine, and I had shown him how to do the headstand-handstand pushups that I used to strengthen my arms for gymnastics. Anyway, the exercise equipment was all hidden away and the room aired out to get it ready for the party. That, music, and a trash can full of purple passions was all the party preparations we did!
As we entered the parlor the party was just getting started. I handed Sam a drink and warned her about the booze, but she tipped her head back, drained the glass, and went to get a second. To my surprise, Kaeti showed up with Tiny. They seemed an odd couple, but they were both great people and Tiny was certainly taller than she was – so they should hit it off. Funny, after the signing party I thought he was into well-endowed women. Given our budding friendship, I did take Kaeti aside and warned her about the booze. I thought about saying something about Tiny, but had the feeling that Kaeti could take care of herself. She appeared to heed my warning about the purple passions by nursing one glass while eating the fruit.
Then Willie showed up with Kayanna. All thoughts of Tiny and Kaeti flew out of my mind. Willie came in quietly and cautiously, as usual, measuring each person with his eyes. Then Kayanna came in slightly behind him; her head was lowered with her long silky blonde hair shadowing her pretty face. Her shoulders were held forward as if to camouflage the beauty of her rather full chest. Had she been a true princess or a goddess, she would have thrust her chest forward and let the world know the gifts that had been bestowed on her. She was nervous and feeling out of place in this already bawdy room. But the differences between Willie and Kayanna were greater than the physical – beauty and the beast thing. By now I knew Willie as sharp minded, focused, more that a little torqued, but very worldly-wise. Kayanna, on the other hand, was a babe in the woods! Her personality could be seen if you ever got a look into her wide-eyed, innocent blue eyes. Actually wide-eyed and innocent would be the definition for all of Kayanna. Her father was an ambassador, if not the ambassador, to France, and she lived in Paris, but her very demeanor shouted that she had lived a sheltered life. Seeing the two together was definitely strange. Kayanna crowded closer to Willie as they disappeared in the room.
It was still early in the evening when I started getting a buzz. I was a little surprised by this because I had managed to nurse two glasses of punch while eating a bunch of the purple apples. They were great! I lost track of Sam for a while and ran into Kaeti while looking for her. “Hey, kiddo, you should have warned me about the fruit,” Kaeti said. “I’m high, and I am still on my first cup!”
“Wow! I was wondering how I got so buzzed! Hey, have you seen my date?”
“Sam? She’s over there by the punch.”
“Again, oh no!”
I turned and saw Sam leaning against the wall by the punch trashcan with one blue eye just visible where her hair parted – and the eye appeared to be wavering back and forth. Then, as I started to walk toward her, the eye disappeared behind her hair, and she slid bonelessly down the wall into a seated position on the floor. I ran over and caught her before she fell over onto her side. She awoke at my touch with a look of total terror! She covered her mouth with one hand, grabbed my shoulder with the needle-like fingers of her other, and dragged herself to her feet. She then looked about crazed, and bolted out the door into the hallway. Sensing her urgency, I ran with her and guided her to the toilet. There I sat holding her hair out of her face and rubbing her back as she puked it all back up! From date to caregiver in half an hour, Great!
When she finished, without giving my presence a second thought, she turned, hiked up her skirt, dropped her panties, sat down and took a leak. When the liquid stopped, she stood, threw her arms around my neck, panties still at her ankles, and leaned into me for a kiss. In other circumstances she might have been inviting, but her recent performance, disheveled