Lauren Weisberger 3-Book Collection: Everyone Worth Knowing, Chasing Harry Winston, Last Night at Chateau Marmont. Lauren Weisberger
I once again found myself in the rather uncomfortable position of being unable to speak or respond with any sort of consistency, and so I was delighted when Penelope announced that she was ready to go.
‘I know we just got here,’ she said quietly in my ear, ‘but this just isn’t my scene. Are you okay here by yourself? Your whole office is here. It should be fine, right?’
‘Pen, don’t be crazy! I’m coming with you,’ I announced, mostly eager for an excuse to leave, with only a hint of desire to stay and talk to Philip.
Danny returned, leading a cocktail waitress over to us. Philip and Sonja received their requested drinks and I was thoughtfully provided with a mini bottle of Piper and a red-striped sipping straw. Penelope received nothing.
‘Here, have a drink before we go,’ I said, and thrust the bottle in her direction.
‘Bette, I’m just done, okay? I really think you should just stay and—’
‘AVERY!’ Elisa shrieked all of a sudden, propelling her emaciated figure off the couch and into the arms of a tall blond guy wearing an aggressively preppy pink shirt. Both Penelope and I turned simultaneously to see her fiancé embracing my coworker as though they’d known one another for years. ‘Come here. Y’all just have to meet my favorite party boy, Avery Wainwright. Avery, this is—’
Apparently the look on both our faces was enough to stop her mid-sentence, a feat I’d never before thought possible.
‘Hey, honey, I didn’t know you were coming here tonight,’ Avery said, extracting himself from Elisa’s signature arm-grip and enveloping Penelope in a rather awkward bear hug.
‘I didn’t know you were, either,’ she said quietly, not quite meeting his eyes. ‘You said you were going to dinner with the boys tonight.’
I wished I could scoop up Penelope and whisk her off to the Black Door, where we could drown that yucky feeling – he hadn’t done anything technically wrong, but I knew her stomach was sinking anyway. But there was nothing to do but try and divert attention away from their two-person show.
‘I did go to dinner with the boys. We all went to Sparks, and then most of them wanted to get home, but I decided to check this place out with Rick and Thomas. See, they’re right over there,’ he said quickly, the words tumbling out in the panicky tone of someone who’d just been caught.
Rick and Thomas were, in fact, located where he’d indicated. In the thirty seconds since they’d arrived, a group of very young girls had accepted their invitation to join them at their VIP table and were just beginning to shimmy and dance on the banquette. Penelope looked like she was ready to throw up. I could tell it was coming to her in waves, the realization that if she hadn’t been there, Avery would most likely be grinding against one of those girls right now.
‘Mmm,’ she murmured, watching as Rick and Thomas sandwiched a girl between them and gyrated. ‘I see.’
‘Pen, come here, baby, it’s not like that. They know those girls from work and they’re just being friendly.’
‘Work?’ Her voice was steely and her eyes had turned to ice. Everyone was waiting for a colossal fight, so I began chatting up Elisa, Philip, Danny, and Sonja simultaneously and nudged Penelope to move a few feet away to spare us a scene.
‘So, Sonja, what sort of agencies are you interviewing with?’ I asked, wondering if Philip had perhaps meant ‘schools’ instead. She was really, really young.
‘Oh, you know, the common ones. Elite, Ford, Wilhelmina. Phee-ly says I will make beautiful model.’
‘Sure do, doll. Ever since this one was a mere tyke, trolling around the villa in nappies, I thought she was splendid. Jailbait, but splendid.’ He was now officially leering.
‘Gel-bet? What is gel-bet?’ she asked us both, her eyes crinkling adorably.
‘Nothing, doll. Why don’t you sit right here and look ravishing and let me talk to Betty for a minute, okay?’
‘You know, Betty is really cute, but I prefer Bette,’ I said as nicely as I could manage.
‘You are a randy one, aren’t you?’ He put his hands on my hips and pulled me close, but didn’t make a move to kiss me. It was hard to concentrate on his flawlessly chiseled face when I could hear Avery pleading in the background.
‘Honey, I don’t know why she called me a “party boy.” You know I like to go out. Hell, I wish you’d come with me more. Elisa’s just a silly cokehead who happens to know where the good parties are, that’s all.’
That bastard. He had the nerve to stand there and call Elisa a cokehead through clenched teeth and a lower jaw so jittery it looked like it was hooked up to electrodes. Penelope knew a lot of things the rest of us didn’t – how to wrap presents, when to write thank-you notes, the best way to set a dinner table – but she was painfully clueless when it came to Avery, drugs, or Avery and drugs. Skye finally came back from the bathroom, her jaw all atwitter as well. The DJ switched from chill lounge music to OutKast, which apparently inspired Elisa to grab Davide and Skye and begin dancing on the banquettes. She rarely took her eyes off Philip, who had walked across the room, but he didn’t seem to notice. Her stilettos began piercing neat, clean holes in the white suede, and I felt better with each little ripping sound.
But not for long. The voice behind me was unmistakable, and I immediately felt my stomach sink.
‘Bette! So funny seeing you here!’ Abby tugged on my arm, causing my champagne to splash on the suede.
‘Hey, Abby,’ I said as flatly as possible, looking around for a possible escape before even making eye contact.
‘So, you and Philip are looking pretty hot and heavy, huh?’ She winked and I suppressed an urge to scratch the grin off her face.
‘Mmmm. What brings you here?’
She laughed and adjusted a five-inch heel, which did little to disguise her height. ‘Does anyone need a reason to have a little fun? Ohmigod, is that Avery Wainwright? We haven’t had a chance to catch up recently. That boy grew into a very handsome man, don’t you think?’
‘He’s engaged,’ I snapped. ‘To Penelope. You remember Penelope, don’t you?’
She feigned cluelessness. ‘Hmm. Well, you know what they say …’
‘No, what’s that?’
‘Nothing’s final until the vows are exchanged.’ She rubbed her hands together as though she was anticipating something very delicious or exciting.
At my reaction she said, ‘Oh, Bette, calm down. I was just kidding!’ A look of mock horror passed over her face. ‘You should really work on that sense of humor, you know. Speaking of which—’
‘Abby, it was really great bumping into you, but I’ve got to get back to my friends. Sort of a work night, you know?’ I ducked out from behind her and began sliding away.
‘Sure, honey, but let’s get that lunch sometime soon, okay? I’d love to hear all about Philip and the new job and everything. Everyone’s still talking about that mention in New York Scoop,’ she called after me.
I wanted to make sure Penelope was holding up, but Avery had her cornered and neither looked thrilled, so I made my way back to our table, where Davide handed me a drink.
Penelope immediately walked over. ‘Bette, I think we’re going to head out,’ she said wearily, sounding as though she’d rather kill herself than either stay or leave.
‘You okay? Seriously, why doesn’t Avery just stay here and hang out and you and I can go get something to eat? I wouldn’t mind leaving before I do something I’ll seriously regret, like going home with Philip and making mad, passionate love to him, even though I think he’s the most obnoxious guy I’ve ever met.’
She