The Surgeon's Gift. Carol Marinelli
just press the buzzer.’
Walking smartly to the treatment room, she tipped the empty ampoules and syringes into the sharps box. The footsteps she heard behind her were heavy and already familiar, and she could feel the animosity from Hugh as he banged about, laying up a dressing trolley.
‘I can do her dressing for you.’
‘It’s fine. I just want to reinforce it.’ He stared at her thoughtfully for a moment. ‘You should add a postscript to your little platitude about pressing the buzzer, Sister.’
‘Meaning?’ Although Rachael knew where the conversation was leading, she was stalling for time, trying to avoid the inevitable.
‘Meaning you should add ‘‘unless I’m tied up with one of my real patients’’ or ‘‘so long as you don’t want a bit of friendly conversation’’.’
‘I don’t like talking about my personal life.’
‘She was just being nice, for goodness’ sake.’
‘Look, Doctor, you might be happy to sit on the beds and tell the patients what you had for breakfast this morning. I don’t work like that. I prefer to keep a professional distance.’
‘So I’ve noticed.’ He raked a hand through his hair and turned to go, but just as Rachael thought the lecture was over, Hugh had second thoughts.
‘You’re like a breath of fresh air, Rachael, you know that? You’re a real charmer to work with.’
‘I don’t have to wear my heart on my sleeve to be a good nurse.’ Rachael retorted.
‘Maybe not,’ Hugh said crisply, turning on his heel. ‘But observing a few social pleasantries wouldn’t go amiss either.’
As first days back went, it wasn’t a exactly a howling success, but neither was it a total disaster, Rachael reflected as she sat at the nurses’ station towards the end of her shift, writing up her patients’ notes. It actually was good to be back. OK, the United Nations might need to draw up a peace treaty to keep her and Hugh from killing each other, but for the most part, the day had been all right.
Sheila had been reviewed by Cardiology and though her bloods and ECG had been reported unchanged, the event meant her operation had been set back further. Hailey, once the pethidine had kicked in, had slept for most of the afternoon, happily receiving visitors during the evening. And her other two patients had pretty much taken care of themselves, apart from needing some drugs and dressing changes. Everything Rachael had done during her shift had to be diligently recorded and as she sat there, chewing the end of her pen, she realised it was nice to be actually using her brain again, to be dwelling on other people’s problems for once. OK, so there had been a few hiccoughs, but Rachael was determined not to dwell on them.
She had survived her first day back.
‘They’re ready for you.’ Helen gave an encouraging smile as she came out of the office. Stepping in, Rachael felt a million miles away from the nervous wreck that had started the shift only hours earlier.
‘Be gentle with me, guys.’ She smiled before she started her handover. ‘I haven’t done it in ages.’
A few cat-calls showed that one thing that definitely hadn’t changed was the below-the-belt humour of nurses, and with the help of an encouraging wink or two from a couple of old colleagues Rachael handed over her patients to the care of the night staff.
‘They didn’t eat you alive, then?’ Helen asked as Rachael pulled out her hair tie and slipped on her jacket.
‘They were fine. Everyone’s been great.’
‘So we’ll see you back here tomorrow?’
Rachael nodded. ‘Thanks, Helen.’ As she went to go, her colleague called her back.
‘Drop these into the doctors’ office on the way past, would you? Hugh just buzzed for them.’
There was no getting out of it. Rachael hesitated before knocking. Hugh’s blond head was turned from her as he tapped away on the computer. Opening the door, she slipped the papers on the desk. ‘Helen said you needed these.’
Not waiting for an answer, she started to leave.
‘Rachael, about this afternoon …’
‘Let’s not go there, huh?’ She really didn’t want to end the day on a confrontational note. All she wanted to do now was go home, peel off her uniform and slip into a warm bath. Rowing with Hugh again was way down on her list of priorities, but realising, in the name of patient of care, that something needed to be said if they were going to work effectively together, after only the slightest pause Rachael swallowed her pride. ‘I’m sorry for earlier. I think we got off to a bad start. Maybe we can start afresh tomorrow?’
The bitter pill of apologising was made sweeter by his quick response. ‘I’d like that.’ He had swung his chair around to face her now. ‘I’m sorry as well. Some of my comments were uncalled-for. I’m sure I just got it all wrong. Helen’s been singing your praises, and she’s a pretty good judge of character.’
‘I hope so, because she’s been saying the same about you.’
Hugh laughed. ‘So we’re both perfect—is it any wonder we clashed? Anyway, I’ve held you up long enough. No doubt you’re desperate to get back to your baby.’
Turning to go, her hand stayed on the doorhandle. She felt rather than heard him turn back to the computer and though she didn’t want to do it, Rachael also knew that it was time. If they were going to have any chance of working together as a team, then some things were just best out in the open.
‘Hugh …’ The tapping on the keyboard stopped. ‘I’m not saying this to make you feel awkward …’ He swung back to face her, his eyebrows furrowing as he looked at her face.
‘Whatever’s wrong? I thought we’d decided to start afresh tomorrow, the rows forgotten.’
She nodded, biting hard on her lip, taking a moment to compose herself before she answered as Hugh watched her quizzically. ‘I know that. Look, I didn’t say anything to Hailey because she’s only going to be here for the next couple of days so it didn’t seem fair to upset her, but you and I are going to be working together a lot …’
‘Rachael, I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.’
‘I know.’ There was an awful silence … Hugh waiting for her explanation, Rachael wondering just how best to give it.
‘I did have a little girl,’ she started. ‘Her name was Amy.’ She watched as his quizzical look vanished, replaced instead by a look of cold shock, horror even, as he registered the past tense in her words. ‘And, as I said to Hailey, she was beautiful.’
‘Was?’ Hugh’s voice was more a croak, and he involuntarily winced as she nodded.
‘She was stillborn.’
Strong hands were around her then, guiding her to a chair, gently pushing her down onto the solid seat behind her.
‘Sorry.’ Rachael spoke softly.
‘Don’t say sorry.’ His voice was slightly breathless as he grappled to respond to her, the wind knocked out of his sails. ‘It should be me saying sorry, Rachael. I had no idea.’
‘Of course you didn’t, no one ever does. You go off on maternity leave and everyone just assumes that you’ve had a wonderfully healthy baby and you’re going to break into a spiel about sleepless nights and nappy rash.’
‘But why didn’t you just say something? I mean, Hailey was banging on about babysitters.’ He winced as he recalled the conversation. ‘It must have been agony for you.’
‘It was.’ Rachael let out a low laugh but they both knew it was void of any humour. ‘Look, Hugh, how are you feeling now?’
‘Me?’