Bad Dad. Tony Ross
Must Come Down
Chapter 35: Champagne, Perfume and Hairspray
Chapter 39: A Figure in the Shadows
Chapter 47: Where Did You Get That Goose?
Chapter 51: A Graveyard for Cars
Chapter 58: Kill Two Birds With One Stone
Chapter 59: Overcooked Sausages
Chapter 61: The Noise! The People!
Chapter 65: Frank Takes the Stage
Chapter 66: Not a Seat in the House
More from the World of David Walliams
Dads come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. There are FAT ones and thin ones, tall ones and short ones. There are young ones and old ones, clever ones and stupid ones.
There are silly ones and serious ones, LOUD ones and quiet ones.
Of course there are good dads, and bad dads.
This is the story of a dad and his son.
Frank is the son.
Dad is the dad. His name is Gilbert.
This is Rita, Frank’s mum.
Auntie Flip is Dad’s aunt.
She babysits Frank sometimes.
Mr Big is a surprisingly small crime boss. Whatever time of day it is, he wears silk pyjamas and a dressing gown, with velvet slippers monogrammed “Mr B”.
Mr Big has two henchmen, Fingers and Thumbs.
Fingers is so called for his long, thin fingers, perfect for picking pockets.
Thumbs has enormous thumbs that he uses to inflict terrible pain on Mr Big’s enemies.
Will and Bear are Thumbs’s fearsome nephews.
Chang is Mr Big’s sinister butler.
Reverend Judith is a vicar.
Sergeant Scoff is the local policeman.
Mr Swivel is a one-eyed