They Let Me Write a Book!: Jamie’s World. Jamie Curry
quote on the wall, is BE YOURSELF. If you feel awkward, embrace the awkwardness. I’m still as awkward as that kid eating lunch alone, I’ve just learnt that nobody really cares. People are too involved in themselves most of the time anyway. Just let rip and see what happens.
Oh yeah, so I guess we should talk about my weird hat thing. I wore hats constantly growing up, I had so many. Dad used to travel a lot and bring me baseball caps from around the world. My particular favourite was a cowboy hat that I used to wear absolutely everywhere. I would draw flowers on it, pin up the sides all different ways. I tried to seal off my drawings on the hat with superglue, which made it kind of chunky and even more dirty looking. Very chic. It was filthy anyway because I used to wear it in any and every situation. It became kind of my ‘thing’. You know, Miley pokes her tongue out, Lorde has dark lipstick, Jamie has a decomposing cowboy hat. We’re all the same.
‘MILEY POKES HER TONGUE OUT, LORDE HAS DARK LIPSTICK, JAMIE HAS A DECOMPOSING COWBOY HAT.’
MUM’S TAKE
Even the hat can’t fight the shade
‘Jamie always wore hats, ever since she was about one year old. She didn’t wear her hat to kindergarten one day and the teacher had to ask who she was. Everyone would say, “She’s got such a pretty little face when she doesn’t have a hat on.”’
It was really tough feeling isolated when I was younger. But at the same time, I think it was good for me. The isolation gave me some fire. I became really determined to not be a loser at some point in my life. I used to always just sit there quietly and think about how these people won’t really exist after I’m done with school. I just kept telling myself that one day I would grow up, move away and be better than them. I channelled all my energy and alone time into making something cool, and that was my ultimate payback. Now I’m making something cool and successful out of my weirdness, and I have them to thank for that. In a way.
‘I CHANNELLED ALL MY ENERGY AND ALONE TIME INTO MAKING SOMETHING COOL, AND THAT WAS MY ULTIMATE PAYBACK.’
If you are in this situation — just remember that bullies are the worst. Sit it out now, but give them ten years — they’ll be sorry. Have a game plan, and get them back by being better than them. It’s a pretty sweet long-term plan, you just have to commit.
‘HAVE A GAME PLAN, AND GET THEM BACK BY BEING BETTER THAN THEM.’
I always think about myself sitting there alone and feeling sad in my cowboy hat. It got me thinking that, if you ever find yourself alone for some reason and needing an activity, it might be fun to add some colour and cheer to your life. Sure, you can fiddle on your phone all you like — but what about a COLOURING-IN COMPETITION?
Colour in this glamorous picture of yours truly and see how fast the time passes. Why not even give it an Instagram and see who else has attempted this great artistic venture? It sounds kiddy, but colouring-in pages are actually making a huge comeback. Trust me, I know about what’s cool and hip. I listen to Elton John and Third Eye Blind. You can trust me.
COLOUR ME IN!
Finally, a Comedy Star is Born (Jokes)
‘MY STAGE DEBUT WAS AS A CREEPY LITTLE CAN-CAN GIRL, DESPITE HAVING NEVER DANCED IN MY LIFE.’
I HAD ZERO DESIRE TO PERFORM OR ACT when I was younger. I was far too busy excavating my huge hole. At intermediate we were forced to do performing arts — they really tried to push it out of you back then. I absolutely hated the idea of it, but the second I got on stage I realised that it was actually really fun. That was my first big realisation that I could be a performer. Before that, I had only been in the big primary school performances where literally everyone is on stage. My stage debut was as a creepy little can-can girl, despite having never danced in my life. I hated it; it was very weird to be a five-year-old saloon-style can-can girl, coated in so much heavy make-up.
I never wanted to be a performer. I wanted to be a garbage man. I remember seeing the garbage men holding on to the truck with one arm and jumping off, and I thought that was so cool. Amongst all the kids that wanted to be astronauts and presidents, I went home from school and told my mum that I was going to be a garbage man. They were always fit and happy. I liked that. Still dreaming big to this day, I guess.
‘I WENT HOME FROM SCHOOL AND TOLD MY MUM THAT I WAS GOING TO BE A GARBAGE MAN.’
I remember when I first made a big group of people laugh at me. On purpose, I mean, not because I was wearing a rotten cowboy hat and sitting in a muddy hole. On feast days at church we would celebrate our saints, and each class would put on a performance for the school. The theme was TV shows, so I decided to be a hilarious presenter on New Zealand’s Got Talent. It went really well, I absolutely slayed. That’s when things sort of clicked for me, and people started telling me that I was funny.
During this time, I also started learning little magic tricks with coins. I think those tricks helped me to learn how to perform, and gain a bit of confidence in front of a crowd. I would always whip them out at random times. People would get all excited about it and crowd around me. Universal truth: everyone loves magic. It’s a great way to get attention; just yell ‘Does anyone have a coin?’ If you can’t follow it up with anything, just run away. Free money.* (*This was a joke. Please don’t steal from anyone, or at least don’t blame it on me!)
‘I REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST MADE A BIG GROUP OF PEOPLE LAUGH AT ME. ON PURPOSE, I MEAN, NOT BECAUSE I WAS WEARING A ROTTEN COWBOY HAT.’
DAD’S TAKE
Jamie’s bewildering magic
‘On the badminton trips, Jamie would keep everyone entertained with magic and card tricks. She would do these simple tricks that would amaze me to this day — I still have no idea how she did them.’
The next year that we did our school production, I got my own bit in the play where I dressed in my nerd character costume. The same nerd that would later be in the ‘White and Nerdy’ video for all you old-school Jamie-philes out there. That nerd character, funnily enough, came from another production where the theme was YouTube. My chosen YouTube clip was Kathy Beth Terry in Last Friday Night. When I saw the behind-the-scenes video for that, I couldn’t believe how funny Katy Perry was. I wanted to be exactly like her.
The character was so dumb to me, but everyone thought it was hilarious. I saw them all in fits of laughter, and that’s where people started to know me as ‘Jamie the Funny Chick’. I found it easier to make more friends after I found the sense of humour that I liked. Everyone started to cotton on that I was weird as hell, but they liked me for it this time. I’m sure I’ve seen something on Instagram or Pinterest about how you have to like yourself before other people can like you, but I actually reckon it’s true here.
‘I FOUND IT EASIER TO MAKE MORE FRIENDS AFTER I FOUND THE SENSE OF HUMOUR THAT I LIKED. EVERYONE STARTED TO COTTON ON THAT I WAS WEIRD AS HELL, BUT THEY LIKED ME FOR IT THIS TIME.’