My city 3: records Emmanuel. Dmitry Guéorguiévitch Borrony
give birth. Unless men can give birth. They cannot present life. The birth gift is not given them. They do not know what is it, after long tortures and nine-months toxicosis to see as from us – women, new life appears.
– You are absolutely right! – agreed with Luda Emmanuel. – Men will never understand us – women. They will never be able to feel in themselves origin of new life. Will not be able simply to become pregnant. It is not given them. – By Emmanuel having made a pause, grinned. And as if with irony told. – They only are also capable to thrust the pod into our flower, are proud that they it is better, their little friend – a pod, and wants to make the way there to postpone the seed. And their self-conceit that they it is better than others, sometimes backfires them.
Women with all the heart burst out laughing. Both of them imagined this situation when the man tries, becomes exhausted, and at him nothing leaves. There is no erection, the little friend brings. Fiasco, and only. The word "I Can" turned into other word, a word which so pristyzhat men, does of them something similar to a floorcloth. And what still to do to them, they … yes, you were not mistaken. This word "Impotent man". They are impotent men. Men only on a structure a body, according to their physiological data, they simply dying plant, and more than nothing.
– Damned impotent men. – Luda continued. – want to show us – women that they in force, and!?. damned impotent men. Lead the wrong life, and then accuse us – women of the problems – Luda grinned. – No. – with an obvious smile and irony told Luda. – Will not leave. You men will not become us a hindrance. Understand the problems, and we are women somehow we will understand the affairs. All to you to men to order us, time of government of men is over. And now we are women you want it or not we will become equal to you, and not only equal, but also we will surpass you if not in everything, then in many respects. – it having made a pause, finished. – Turn to us on words.
Having listened to Luda, Emmanuel thought. She just saw before herself the woman in anger. It was embittered for the whole world. Yes that on the world, on each man separately. It was possible to assume that Luda's childhood was so joyful as could seem at first sight. She all heart, sincerely hated men. She despised them, despised sincerely all heart of soul. And this hatred was pathological.
Here it was possible to assume that Luda was subjected to violence in the childhood, and can she had an unsuccessful attempt connect the life with some man? He made by it the child, and was washed away. We think out to ourselves justification in the acts. Sometimes we block our consciousness what we create the character invented by us, we name it a certain name, and we say him all that we do not decide to tell our parents. It becomes our to the second "I", and we perceive it as the friend or the girlfriend. For example, we are our thoughts both our sorrows, and grieves we write to the diary. Everyone keeps such diary. If not on papers, then in the thoughts. We say what happened to us for this day, and we ask our the second "I", and it answers us. But sometimes, we cannot say about what happened to us. Neither with invented by us the second "I", nor with the diary, with anybody that either to others or another. Our consciousness in our consciousness locks all bad, and licks in it all that we try to forget. To us it is painful because that we ever endured in our childhood, and in life in general. We lock it, and we throw out it far, in depths of the ocean, human consciousness. Leaving subconsciousness locked. But happens when the subconsciousness cannot contain more in the subconsciousness any more and lock, all information human consciousness. In this case occurs inevitable, and all information which is saved up in our subconsciousness is splashed out outside. There is simply a failure. The hysterics developing into psychosis. Psychosis consciousness of a human hysterics. It also happened to Luda. All that accumulated in it for all years of her life now all this broke loose. Her subconsciousness could not cope with the fact that at present it was splashed out outside. Her subconsciousness could not keep more in itself that it was postponed in it for years. There is at the person a nervous breakdown. This nervous breakdown also happened to Luda now.
Emmanuel carefully took an interest:
– All what you spoke to me now about, you meant yourself?
On this question Luda could not tell anything certain. Yes, she probably, spoke about herself. Just as some people noticing that speak and speak, telling that without knowing all the life. This human mentality, his consciousness issues information, and tells it to someone to whom whom this person does not know. The stranger can tell what you will not tell others. It is the fact. Fact of human mentality. He is a person, will never tell the relatives that he can tell other person. The girlfriend, to the friend, mistress, lover. But never to the mother or father. There is our such mentality. Our consciousness, and subconsciousness. However: the nadsoznaniye of the person, is the reason of this factor. Remember expression: "Over subconscious level …", as well as on a nadsoznaniye human level, we understand that in subconsciousness we want to speak about something with someone. Only with ourselves that turns our subconsciousness into consciousness, and we speak about the problems with the one whom we do not know at all, with our invented "I". We begin to keep the diary, writing down all our thoughts there, closing on the lock, or according to extremely Mary we so think. But we cannot sometimes tell the diary that at us boiled at heart. Emotions – which in us, were splashed out outside, and here we in full to emptiness. To emptiness of the feelings. We just fall into hysterical panic, and then and in hysteria all that in us boiled is splashed out outside, and we begin to damn all that we only can. And at last, we do not maintain, and having found ourselves a goat remission we pour out all that information which accumulated in our subconscious and irresponsible level outside. We remember all bad and good that was with us once. We comprehend and process this information, and we draw logical for this purpose the conclusion a conclusion: "another is guilty I, and someone". No matter who is guilty? Guilty will always be. We become embittered on all people, the whole country, and we do not consider ourselves guilty: – "Are guilty all but me". – so we speak or so considers our subconsciousness? Obviously, here the riddle of ours conclusion is also concealed. In our subconsciousness there are what that button, the button our subconscious "I". It blocks our experiences, she removes this blocking, and all emotions of the person come to light. Obviously – all to agree with me that so it also is actually.
The same situation happened also to Luda. It just did not sustain all that freight. Freight – her subconsciousness, also escaped outside. And Emmanuel was that woman – the stranger who could tell about the problems, without speaking at the same time: – "I told someone, and now this person can tell that I told him this story or any other, and he will give me with giblets". – Now Luda was not afraid of it. Was not afraid before the moment when Emmanuel carefully took an interest: "All what you spoke to me now about, you meant yourself?". – This question cast Luda into slight panic. She understood on Emmanuel and as if without understanding that that asked, Luda asked again:
– What? – then she asked. What did you tell?
Emmanuel asked the same question:
– I asked, all what you spoke to me now about, you meant yourself?
Luda did not know what to answer. Now, when she told Emmanuel, that she at her at heart, and between other told it about what at it on heart, she did not know as to tell? What to answer a question Emmanuel? And having understood what to tell there is nothing, Luda told:
– No, I not about. – she used cunning, and added vaguely. – I generally.
Stretched to Emmanuel long:
– And – and – and-and … – and having made a puzzled significant pause, added. – Means generally?
Luda perhaps understood that she did not want that, but nevertheless dared to speak that there is for her Russia. Yes, it perhaps without realizing made a mistake. She did not know who this woman, and having splashed out now all that information which it, apparently possessed, now she regretted for it. She wanted to return back, to the airport. Never to put this woman into the taxi: "let better it would be carried by this taxi driver. Taxi driver suicide. Than she got into its taxi. What by this foreigner it is not sat in Europe? All to Russia aspire, there is nothing to do here – there is no work, and here also they go". Luda told:
– You know – it having made a pause, continued. – You in vain here arrived.
Without