He Who Returned. Martin Fieber
owns such a large donkey?”
Joshua could not look away from them until he also spotted a child in their age on the donkey, seated sheltered behind the woman. Joshua saw a glowing and froze. There had been something like a bright flash in the darkness, but he could only barely make out the outlines of the strangers. Who was that? Then he saw them. The blue eyes of the child lit up the darkness which was descending over Nazareth just now. The child looked directly at him. It became quiet about Joshua. The demons which had been audible shrieking and cursing in the storm, could not take away the holiness of this moment. These deep blue eyes dug deeply into Joshua’s soul. He became very warm and he felt sheltered. Who was this child?
∞
The sun had risen and shone its golden yellow light on the roughly sixty huts, houses and cave-dwellings of Nazareth. The village lay gracefully snuggled up against the hill behind it, like a panther. A majestic olive tree presided over all of it with its silvery leaves. A few inhabitants strolled comfortably through the alleyways.
The prayers had all been spoken, the family of the rabbi was complete, sitting at the morning meal. Finally they could eat. Like almost every morning they were having unleavened bread, cheese, milk and garlic olive oil. Additionally gigs and dates were served. His father had returned very late yesterday evening from Sepphoris and as always sat at the head of table. And besides, everything in the house of the Rabbi had to be the way it always had been. The seating order was a part of this. Samuel’s wife Sarah sat on the rabbi’s right hand side, to his left Joshua, then came Joshua’s half-sister Esther, whose mother had been the first wife of the rabbi up until her death, and then his younger sister Judith. It was forbidden for Joshua and his sisters to talk while they were seated at the table. They obeyed that rule, for obedience to the father was one of the most important virtues that existed. Obedience was an obligation. In this way Joshua became a good observer.
“Sarah, did I get this wrong or has Joseph the carpenter returned with his family?” Samuel broke a piece of bread and dipped it in the olive oil. Today he somehow seemed stricter. “A lamp was lit in their house yesterday evening and I heard a child laughing.”
Joshua glanced over to his mother and noticed her sad eyes. This atmosphere here was numbing him. His mother seemed fearful. She did not say anything. Joshua knew that whenever she had a hard time speaking she had been treated cruelly by his father. And when the Rabbi got angry, he beat her. Joshua was also often beaten, for the rabbi always found a reason to. Joshua hated his father so much, but also revered him in a strange way since he was highly respected in the village and always treated the other people fairly. And for this he hated him even more.
“Woman, answer me when I ask you a question.” It took a few seconds until Sarah was able to speak. Silence and fear filled the air.
“Yes, they are back again, Samuel.” She spoke very quietly. “Miriam came over to me yesterday evening and greeted me. Then I told her that the village was going to host a celebration in their honor. Joseph wanted to visit you after school and go over some things with you. “ She looked at her husband and awaited a reply that did not come.
“They were in the country of the Egyptians the past four years and meanwhile even have a son. He is called Yeshua. It must have been him you heard laughing. “
“They were gone for four years. Hard to believe that they even dare to show up here again.” Samuel shook his head angrily. “This village could have used a good craftsman these past years. But it is a mystery to me how they are still able to afford that big house. Oh well, then I suppose I will listen to what he has to tell me.”
Not a single word was spoken for the remainder of the meal. The strict glances of the rabbi suppressed any further expression. He was the ruler of this family.
Joshua had to let his mother and sisters clear off the table by themselves and followed Samuel across the courtyard into the large meeting hall which was situated across from the three living rooms. Samuel was a big man who took big steps, however he walked so hunched over that Joshua sometimes thought he would tip over any moment due to losing his balance.
The whole village gathered in the assembly hall when important events were to be discussed, and it was here that the children met for school. The rabbi was especially proud of this assembly room, in which Joshua was taught the teachings of their forefathers together with the other boys.
The family of the rabbi was one of only few in the village that owned a house with several rooms. Other inhabitants hat huts with one room in which the whole family lived and slept. However most of them lived in caves, for Galilee was strewn with caves. These living grottoes mostly consisted of one room, the main space inside of the cave. The living room was closed by a wall of piled up stones except for a space for the entrance. Some caves had an extension room built in front of their entrance which allowed the women more room for cooking and baking. There were also barn caves next to and behind the living areas that gave the animals shelter at night.
Joshua loved studying the torah. Since his fifth birthday that was his life. In the beginning it had been burdensome for him to always have to sit still. His concentration suffered from having to endure the strict gaze of his father for hours on end, and always facing the danger of painful punishment when he made mistakes. But then he found solace in the holy writings of his forefathers. He was lucky in that he learned easily and through this he also gained confidence. Studying the torah gave him courage and strength. In this way his father unintentionally showed him a way to be able bear the tyrant, for Joshua often escaped in his mind into other worlds and prayed to God, his real father. Thus he was able to absorb the teachings well and this was also why he was the best at reciting in school, although he was the youngest in his class.
For several years already Joshua was being taught Hebrew by Samuel. Although no one spoke it nowadays, it was mandatory for the study of the torah, for the torah was only allowed to be read in Hebrew. Samuel already began with this when Joshua was two years old. The first books, which were about Moses, Joshua found boring. The books of the prophets on the other hand were more interesting. Joshua was fascinated by the book of Micah. Especially the fifth chapter, in which the Messiah is announced, who is to be born in some small place in Judea. He had however forgotten which the name of that place.
Today once again the study of the torah was on the agenda. Joshua followed his father, who always wore the lightest prayer tunic over his head. Compared to their fathers Samuel was very old. Joshua had once overheard Sarah telling a friend that Samuel was thirty-nine years old when Joshua was born. He knew that other fathers were only half as old.
“Joshua, come along, hurry up. You are dreaming again.” The old rabbi was angry again and let him feel it.
That was not fair. Joshua became angry. Sometimes his hatred against his father was so strong that he could not fall asleep at night. Then he would pinch himself in the arm so that the pain chased away his thoughts and he could then get to rest, sobbing quietly. Joshua was safe from Samuel in the synagogue, which was what the grown-ups called the assembly room. Only in this place was Samuel not angry at him, one might almost say that he conveyed a sense of pride or quiet affection for Joshua here, for he spoke with him here and never beat him. That is why Joshua dug himself deeper into the study of the torah from month to month. Joshua loved the assembly hall, even if he met Simeon there again.
And sure enough, the first person who crossed his path was this demon of a braggart. He was safe from his mocking in the synagogue, for even he dared not speak in this room, but his glances were almost just as painful. If only Rachel were here, next to whom Joshua felt safe. But girls were not allowed to go to school, they had to learn the arts of household duties at home. But no matter, Samuel wanted to read from the book of Isaiah today. At least this would be exciting, even if it would take a long time. Simeon especially needed a long time for translating the texts into Aramaic. Almost all of them had trouble with the translation, but Simeon was completely incapable. And this pleased Joshua.
“The people who walk in darkness see a great light.” Samuel read loudly and clearly from the book of Isaiah. “A bright light shines over the inhabitants of a dark country. You give rich jubilations, create great joy. One is happy