New Girl On The Job. Hannah Seligson
a group of women who have made an enormous impact in their respective field, some of whom have very recognizable names, such as Bobbi Brown, founder and CEO of Bobbi Brown Cosmetics; Soledad O’Brien, the host of CNN’s American Morning; Fern Mallis, the vice president of IMG Fashion; Gail Evans, best-selling author of Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman; and Tory Johnson, the CEO of Women for Hire and career expert for ABC’s Good Morning America. In addition, I interviewed other high-level women in every field, ranging from finance to television to the nonprofit sector. I asked these women such questions as, “What did you do at the beginning stages of your career to get you where you are today? “What are the three pieces of advice you have for young women starting out in the twenty-first-century workplace?” “What are some the pitfalls you see young women fall into at the office?” “How do you think this generation of women can break the glass ceiling?” Fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg boils her “New Girl on the Job” advice down to, “I think it is most important for a girl to work. Even when you have a family, it is recommended to have an identity outside of your family. My advice to women is to pay attention to details, put your heart and enthusiasm into work, and just go for it! Enjoy the ride!”
Interviewing such a wide range of women—from those who have “been there”—to those who are “there” in the trenches right now, figuring it out as they go along—gave me the perspective I wish I had had during my short tenure at my first job and perspective that has helped me get where I am today. Perspective I want to pass on to you.
Based on my research, I’ve also identified lists of takeaways, do’s and don’ts, and other helpful guideposts to give you the information you need in quick, concise doses. In addition, I’ve coined terms (here in italics) for many “New Girlisms” defined in a glossary at the back of the book.
What You Can Expect to Find Inside
So what will you find in this book? New Girl on the Job asks and answers tough questions like:
How can I learn not to take things so personally?
What’s the best way to go about getting feedback so I don’t get slammed at my year-end review?
How do I develop a thick skin?
How can I bounce back after I make a mistake?
How do I stand up to a difficult boss?
What are the professional boundaries with co-workers in social situations?
How do I handle my supervisor’s sexual innuendos?
What do I do if I keep getting all the administrative tasks?
How do I assert myself when I feel like I’m being undervalued?
How do I self-promote without being obnoxious?
How can I negotiate my salary or get a raise?
What’s the deal with mentors, and how can I find one?
How can I quit my job without burning bridges?
What do I do if I get fired?
You Need More Than a Nice Suit and Black Pumps
In the November 2006 workplace issue of Glamour magazine, editor-in-chief Cindi Leive wrote, “When I started working eighteen years ago, pretty much the only advice I received was this, from a friend’s mom: ‘Buy black pumps.’ So I strode into the working world with good shoes…and no clue about anything else.”1 Although Cindi started working two decades ago, her experience of preparing for the workplace is not much different from today; in fact, the majority of young women interviewed for New Girl on the Job said that buying a suit was the extent of their career preparation.
But we all know that in the highly competitive twenty-first-century workplace, you need resources beyond the salesperson at the department store. This is not to say that young women can’t survive and flourish in their first couple of jobs without a book—many have and will continue to—but New Girl on the Job will empower young women intent on building a successful career. It’s time to give the next generation of women moving through the workforce the potent combination of knowledge and tools to make their first steps on a career path positive ones, setting a precedent of success in these formative years.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
New Girl on the Job would not have come to fruition without the voices of over 100 women, who shared their workplace experiences and insights with me. My deepest gratitude to all those I interviewed.
Thank you to Elisabeth Weed, my amazing agent at Trident Media Group, who believed in this book in its infancy, and for her continued guidance and friendship throughout the process.
An enormous thank you to Alice Peck for teaching me how to make it “sing” and for having the big vision for this book from the very, very beginning.
A number of people provided instrumental help along the way. A huge debt of gratitude and the standing offer to put you all on a retainer one day to:
Dina Epstein, my dear friend and future business partner, for her feedback on an early draft. Jamie Kaufman, the jack of all trades, whose magic touch I don’t know what I do without. Brienne Walsh for setting up the meeting that started it all and, thereby, putting the New Girls’ Network in motion. Jayne Finst for all the material and support. Brooke MacDonald for being such an amazing guinea pig. Colleen Cary for modeling how to find a career not a job.
And finally, gratitude beyond measure to my editor, Danielle Chiotti, for her dedication to this book that never failed to come through with all of her keen editorial suggestions, and for being that rare hybrid: my editor and mentor.
CHAPTER ONE
Making a Graceful Entrance
How to Find a Job You Don’t Want to Quit
The beginning years in the workforce entail constant trial and error, and that often translates into a lot of turnover. Most young people take the first job that’s offered to them, even if it’s not the best match, because they feel like having a job is more important than having the right job. Sound familiar? Think about it: You probably don’t know many people two years out of school who are in the same job they took right after graduation, and that number dwindles the more years you’ve been in the workforce. According to 2001 unpublished data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the median length of time workers in their early twenties stay in one job has shrunk by half since 1983—from 2.2 years then to 1.1 now.1
Like many young women starting out, Esther, 29, an architect in New York, says she was too eager to jump into her first job. After that experience she discovered the cardinal job-searching principle. “You really have to consider yourself a good enough product to sell. That way, you will look at a lot of places and not just jump at the first offer. With my first job, I sort of jumped the gun and it wasn’t the best experience. With my second job, which I’m a lot happier at, I came to visit the office and had them show me the project they were working on. Doing my due diligence made me a lot more confident about coming in on my first day, and ultimately happier and more productive at my job.”
Making a Match
Finding the right job match is a lot easier said than done. The reality is that most people don’t enjoy what they do. In a 2003 Career Builder survey, nearly one in four workers said they were dissatisfied with their job, a 20 percent increase over 2001. And six in ten workers said they planned to leave their job for other pursuits within two years.2 But how do you even know where to start looking? To make the best match possible—and this sounds ridiculously obvious but is often overlooked—it helps to figure out what you are best at. The truism goes something like this: “Your learned skills augment your natural abilities.” Figuring out what you are good at and matching those skills to a specific job are going to make finding a prospect and making a match a lot easier.
Steve Jobs, the founder and president of Apple Computer, Inc., said in his commencement address to Stanford’s class of 2005, “I’m convinced that the