Father by Surprise: A Man of Distinction / His Baby Surprise. Lisa Childs
paused. “It’s the only way to get it in.” The way she said it made it clear that she thought he was choosing the car over the kid.
He wanted to tell her that it was a very expensive car, but he knew that observation wouldn’t go over real well. Instead he leaned over the seat, making sure to brace it so she couldn’t keep scraping up his woodwork. “He shouldn’t be riding in the front seat anyway.” Clearly, he was going to have to rethink this plan. “Maybe you could bring him out to my place this weekend?”
Tanya’s eyes bored into him. He realized that his face was less than a foot from hers. “This may come as a surprise to you, but I have plans.”
Her tone kept rubbing him the wrong way. Yes, he had earned a little flack, but that didn’t give her the right to treat him like the enemy. She was just as much a culpable party in this as he was. She’d stayed here of her own choice, so she could quit treating him like he’d abandoned her. As far as he could tell, he was not the bad guy here, and the sooner she stopped treating him like he was, the easier things would be. “This may come as a surprise to you, but not everything I say is a direct attack on you.”
She held his gaze without flinching. He leveled his most effective glare at her, and she met him head-on. Despite the attitude, he was impressed that she didn’t buckle. “So you’re leaving indirect attacks on the table.”
He was about to cut her down to size—he did not need all this resistance in his life—but then the corner of her mouth curved up and the angry lines faded from around her eyes. And just like that, she was radiant.
The air between them seemed to thin, making it hard to breathe. Relinquishing his grip on the car seat, he reached up and smoothed an escaped strand of hair away from her face before he cupped her cheek in his hand. “I have missed you, Tanya.”
She leaned into his touch, her eyelids fluttering—but not quite closing. Instead, she opened them wide. The confrontation was gone; instead, he saw desire just below the surface. This time, it wasn’t hiding behind ulterior motives. It was right out where he could see it.
“I don’t have to love you.” She tried to throw his words back at him, but she couldn’t stop the way her voice shook. He could feel that tremor through his hand. It was a small thing, but he still felt it throughout his entire body.
Mentally, he pumped his fist in victory. For once, she didn’t have a barb ready to throw at him. “But you still care for me, don’t you?” You still want me is what he really wanted to ask, but that would be pushing too far, too fast. Besides, Tanya was smart enough to know what he’d really been asking.
She dropped her gaze, her face flushing with a different sort of heat. Nick could hear the yes on her breath. He could see it in her eyes. But she didn’t say it. Instead, she pulled away and backed out of the car.
He’d lost her. Maybe she was better at playing this game than he thought. But he wouldn’t let his disappointment show. Part of playing the game was not letting the other side know when they had you on the ropes. He stood. Tanya stood by the driver’s door. He could feel the weight of her expectations. He just wasn’t sure what she expected of him. She wanted him, that much was clear. But she didn’t trust him. Though she seemed open to letting him spend more time with Bear. Maybe he’d been wrong earlier—this situation wasn’t as black-and-white as he wanted it to be. Not for her anyway. “I’d still like to see Bear this weekend.” Of course, he’d like to see Tanya, too, and preferably without a car between them.
“You’re welcome to come with us.”
Was he mistaken, or was there a challenge in her eyes? “Sure, I could do that. Where are you going?”
No, he wasn’t mistaken. She was throwing down the gauntlet. “There’s a powwow in Platte.” Her smile grew menacing. “I’m sure everyone would love to see you again.”
Nick’s mouth ran dry. He’d been to powwows before. He’d done his fair share of dancing. But that had been a long time ago. A lifetime ago, some would say.
Powwows were big deals on the rez. Everyone came for the food and the dancing. Which meant everyone would be there. All those people who he hadn’t seen in years—people who still lived in crappy trailers, who still drank themselves into a stupor. His family would be there.
Everything he’d tried to escape.
Tanya was waiting on an answer. Nick knew he should say something smooth, something that wouldn’t knock her opinion of him down another notch—“Sounds great” would be a good start—but he couldn’t do it. It was bad enough to work in a hole of a broom closet, worse to see his son living in near-poverty. He couldn’t bring himself to willingly lower himself any more. He was not going to be one of “those Indians,” damn it. Not for Tanya. Not even for Bear. Not for anyone.
And to think, just a half hour ago, Nick had been sure Tanya didn’t play any games. Well, she’d played him—right into a corner. And the only way out was through her.
So he went on the offensive. He couldn’t help it. She had him trapped, so he had to do an end-run. “How many of those people know I’m Bear’s father? No one at the office seems to have a clue.”
It worked. “What?”
“My own mother never mentioned you had a kid. Did you tell people you had a one-night stand after a weekend of drinking? Immaculate conception? Who did you name as the father?”
If he were half the lawyer he thought he was, he wouldn’t be letting the crestfallen look on her face make him feel the slightest bit guilty. She’d backed him into a corner—he’d just returned the favor. He should not feel bad for her.
But he did, damn it all. Her eyes watered, but he had to admire her self-control, which kept those tears from spilling over. “He was small,” she said, the fierceness in her voice at odds with the wounded expression on her face. “People assumed he was premature. No one suspects you.” She spat the last word out like she’d expected to eat some chocolate and gotten a Brussels sprout instead. “And I don’t expect you to come to the powwow. I wouldn’t want you to debase yourself. God forbid you act like an Indian, Nick. God forbid you be an Indian.”
He watched her storm back into her dinky house and slam the door. At least he’d been right about one thing. No one in Chicago talked to him like Tanya did.
He wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Chapter 6
Tanya walked around the outside of the dance circle. Well, walked was a strong word. She lurched around it, with Bear holding on to both of her hands as he smiled at everyone and every thing—even a bear headdress got a grin. The elders sitting in lawn chairs patted Bear on the head; a few dancers in full regalia swooped him up and spun him around. The red, black and yellow fringe on Bear’s dance shirt whipped around him, almost as if the yarn was laughing out loud for him.
She loved coming to the powwows. When she’d been younger, she’d competed in the fancy shawl dance, her fringe spinning as much as Bear’s did this afternoon. However, now that she was older, she preferred to do the traditional dance. The fringe still swayed, but not with the same fervor.
Tanya chatted with people as they made the rounds. Socializing was a huge part of the powwow, but she also took mental notes on who needed to have a hot meal delivered or who was in danger of having their power shut off this winter. One of the reasons she stuck with the receptionist job at the Tribal Council was that Councilwoman Mankiller would sit down with her once a month and listen to Tanya’s “news from the front,” as she called it. If there was enough money in the budget, Councilwoman Mankiller authorized Tanya to pay an electric bill or do the grocery shopping for the elders. It wasn’t a lot, but Tanya could say she was making life better for her tribe, one meal at a time. That was why she’d wanted to be on the Council in the first place—once she had some real power, she’d be able to move up from one meal, one bill at a time to wider initiatives.