The Amish Mother. Rebecca Kertz
Ja, it hurts a mudder as it happens, but then the birth is a joyous thing, and she forgets all about the pain.”
“Mam didn’t,” Annie said, startling Lizzie with her words. “She wasn’t happy after Ezekiel was born. She cried a lot and Dat tried to make her feel better, but she didn’t listen.” Annie looked at Lizzie with confusion. “Why didn’t Mam love us anymore?”
“What?” Lizzie said, taken aback by the child’s revelation. “I’m sure that your mam must have loved you very much.”
Annie blinked back tears.
“Nay. Mam didn’t want us anymore. I heard her telling Dat.”
“She was probably tired and upset. I doubt she meant it.” Lizzie placed an arm around her daughter’s shoulders. “I’m sure your mam loved you just as your dat did.” Annie had overheard things that her mother never should have said. It upset Lizzie to realize that Annie was still hurt by the memory. Some women suffered depression after giving birth. They couldn’t enjoy life or their babies. Was that the way it had been with Abraham’s first wife?
“I miss Dat.”
Lizzie nodded. “I know you do,” she whispered. “So do I.”
“Onkel Zack looks like Dat, only his hair is dark and he is younger.”
Lizzie had noticed and told her so. It hurt her to know that Anne had suffered. She hugged her, put on a happy face and said, “Now, we should go downstairs to fix breakfast. Would you like to help make waffles?”
Annie nodded enthusiastically. “Ja, I like helping in the kitchen.”
“I’ll get dressed and then we’ll go downstairs. I need to feed the animals first. Will you set the table while I’m outside?”
Annie agreed, and soon Lizzie and Annie went silently down the stairs to the kitchen. Lizzie took out the plates, napkins and utensils and gave them to Anne. Then she left the house and crossed the yard. She reached the barn as Zack was leaving it.
“Zack!” she gasped, startled.
“Lizzie.”
“Is there something I can help you with? I’ve come to feed the animals and do the milking,” she said.
“The animals have been fed.” Zack studied her intently. “And your cows have been milked.” He held up the bucket of milk she hadn’t noticed previously.
“You did my chores?” she said politely, but she was silently outraged.
“I thought I’d help with the chores while I am here,” he said. “You have enough to do caring for the children.”
“I’ve been doing just fine since your brooder died,” she told him. “And I’ve been managing well.”
“Ja.” His voice was quiet as he narrowed his gaze on her. “But it’s time someone helps you with the burden.”
Lizzie stiffened. “I don’t consider the children or this farm a burden.”
He nodded, looking thoughtful. “I don’t suppose you do. But I’d like to work as long as I am staying here. Is that a problem? What would you have me do all day, if not help with the farm chores?”
Lizzie opened her mouth to respond and then promptly shut it. She sighed. She understood how he felt. “Fine. You may help.”
His lips twitched. “Goot.”
“’Tis not because I can’t do it,” she pointed out quickly.
Amusement gleamed in his dark eyes. “I never said it was.”
Lizzie felt satisfied. She would try not to feel threatened just because he needed something to do.
“Will you and Esther come for breakfast? The children should be awake soon. Please join us.”
He seemed to think for a minute as his gaze went toward the dawdi haus. “I don’t believe Esther has eaten yet.”
“I’ll set places for you.” And she left, her composure shaken by her confrontation with Zack.
Lizzie headed toward the house, her thoughts spinning in her head. Having the Fisher siblings on the property disturbed her peace of mind and threatened her place within this family. She shouldn’t be alarmed if her brother-in-law wanted to do farm chores. Zack hadn’t come out and said that he was here to take over the farm. Perhaps she should confront him and learn the truth? But what if in the asking, I give him the idea he never had? Do I really want to know? Or must I first convince him that I can manage without help before he’ll stop worrying and return to Ohio?
Lizzie entered the house to find that Annie had set the table, and Mary Ruth, Hannah and Rebecca had come downstairs to help with breakfast. The girls looked over as she entered the room with a smile.
“I’ll be making waffles this morning,” she told Mary Ruth. “Would you like some?” Mary Ruth was slow to answer, and Lizzie added, “Your onkel and endie will be eating with us.”
Her eldest daughter looked pleased. “I’ll get the butter and syrup.”
“I’ll help with batter,” Hannah said.
Lizzie shot her a look of apology. “I promised Anne that she could help.”
Hannah looked at Anne, who appeared as if she would cry if someone took away her job of batter making. She appeared to understand. “Can we have muffins, too? Onkel Zack likes your muffins. I can open a new jar of your strawberry jam.”
“That’s a wonderful idea, Hannah,” Lizzie said.
Soon, each of the girls had a special job to do to help in preparing breakfast for their aunt and uncle. Matthew and the two young boys, Jonas and Ezekiel, entered the kitchen minutes later. “It smells goot in here,” Matt said.
Lizzie, who was showing Anne how to stir the batter, glanced over her shoulder. “Zack and Esther are joining us.”
Looking pleased, Matt asked what he could do to help.
As the kitchen filled with activity of her and the children working together, Lizzie felt grateful. If nothing else, Zack’s visit had brought the family together to work without sadness, sulking or anger.
Zack and Esther arrived for breakfast, and everyone sat at the large kitchen trestle table. Lizzie, with Esther’s help, set out the waffles and other breakfast items.
“Waffles!” Zack exclaimed with pleasure as Lizzie handed him a plateful.
“You like waffles, Onkel Zack?” Annie asked.
Zack grinned at her. “Ja.” He took a bite. “These waffles taste especially goot.”
Lizzie watched her daughter beam and felt grateful to Zack for making Anne happy. He looked over and winked at her, and she couldn’t help grinning back at him. He had known that Anne had helped with the batter, and he’d wanted her to feel special.
Zack Fisher is charming. If she weren’t worried about his motives, it would be very easy to fall under his charm. She wondered how it would have been if they’d met at another time and under different circumstances. She frowned. She had to stop thinking of such things. Having such thoughts was disloyal to Abraham and to herself.
The children were excited to eat with their aunt and uncle. They chattered nonstop, especially Matt, Hannah and Rebecca, who debated the merits of waffles with maple syrup versus waffles with warm, sautéed apples.
“I like warm cinnamon apples best,” Hannah declared.
“Nay, there is nothing like goot maple syrup,” Matt insisted. “Don’t ya think, Onkel Zack?”
Zack