Operation Gigolo. Vicki Lewis Thompson
I couldn’t help overhearing some of your conversation. I have some knowledge in this area, and I think you’re both making a big mistake.”
Tony glanced at him in amazement. “Look, Jeff, with all due respect, I don’t think we need your—”
“You should see the color of your aura right now. And hers. You’re both troubled.” Jeff smiled. “Let me help. No charge.”
Lynn leaned forward and gave him a puzzled glance. “I must be missing something.”
Jeff faced her, his expression earnest. “Take pride in who you are! If society makes you ashamed, just surround yourself with white light, stand up and say, ‘This is me. I may be different from you, but that doesn’t make me less valuable, or less moral.’”
Tony had thought the guy was fairly rational, but he was reassessing that conclusion. “Listen, Jeff, are you overdue for some medication, or something? I’ll be glad to call the flight attendant and get you a—”
“I’m having a little trouble with my sun center these days, but meditation and color therapy seems to be taking care of it. In fact, I should be wearing my chakra glasses right this minute. Thanks for reminding me.” He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a pair of canary-tinted wraparound sunglasses and put them on.
Tony stared at him.
“That’s better,” Jeff said, as if it was perfectly normal to wear yellow sunglasses inside an airplane. He patted Tony’s knee. “My practice is filled with people of your persuasion, my friend. I advise you both to confess the truth to your parents. I promise you’ll be cleansed by the experience, and so will they. After all, everybody’s coming out these days.”
“What?” Tony instinctively rose out of his seat and bumped into the lap tray, upsetting his water glass into his lunch. Beside him, he could hear Lynn’s muffled laughter.
“Look, Jeff, I’m not—”
“Oh, Tony, of course you are. Why else would a lawyer feel it necessary to dress like that? You’re trying to project some macho image to throw people off the track, but it’s not working, and you know it.”
“I am not gay.” Tony realized he’d said that a little loud, and people were turning in their seats to check out the conversation.
Lynn cleared her throat and leaned over Tony’s destroyed lunch to gaze at Jeff. “He’s really not,” she said. Her lips were twitching, as if she was having a hell of a time keeping a straight face. “Dressing that way was my idea.”
“I’m not surprised.” Jeff looked knowing. “You’re projecting your own desire to act that role onto Tony. Be courageous! Wear the tight jeans and T-shirt yourself! Go for the motorcycle boots and the tattoo! Believe me, you’ll feel so much better.”
“Okay, here’s the deal,” Lynn said. “My parents are having some problems, and so—”
“There you go. I’ll bet they’re struggling with sexual issues, themselves. Clear the air for all of you, and you might have more in common than you think.”
Tony spoke through clenched teeth. “We…are…straight. All of us. Straight as a board.”
Jeff smiled and settled back against his seat. “You are so typical of my other clients. So defensive. You have my card. When you’re ready to honor that side of yourself, give me a call. I know a great sweat lodge.” He put on a pair of earphones and switched on a small tape recorder he had in his shirt pocket.
Tony had stuck Jeff’s business card in his wallet, and now it seemed to burn a hole in his butt. He longed to get it out and tear it into little pieces, but that would give Jeff more evidence that he was being defensive.
So he turned to look at Lynn instead. Yes, he was definitely heterosexual. He wanted to wring her neck for helping him get into such a ridiculous conversation, but even more he wanted to plant kisses on that neck.
She pressed her lips together and her eyes brimmed with laughter.
He lowered his voice. “You enjoyed that, didn’t you?”
She nodded.
“There goes my bid for the presidential nomination.”
“Tony! I didn’t know you had that kind of ambition.”
“I don’t, but if I did, I’d be dead in the water, and it’s all your fault.”
Her eyes rounded in innocence. “My fault? I defended you.”
“You were trying not to laugh the whole time. Very unconvincing defense, Counselor.”
“Want me to try again?”
“God, no. The harder we protest, the more he believes.” He found his own sense of humor gradually returning. “I’ve been accused of many things in my life, but never that.”
“You’re a very good friend, Tony. I’m sorry I laughed when you were dealing with him, but you have to admit it’s kind of funny. I never imagined somebody would draw that conclusion from our discussion.”
“No telling what the rest of the plane thinks, either, after I shouted out my sexual preference.”
“It doesn’t matter. I know you’re all male.” She paused and gave him a questioning look. “Aren’t you?”
“You’ll pay for that one, Morgan,” he said with a grim smile. And as the plane started its descent into the Phoenix area, he started anticipating the ways he might prove to her that he was, indeed, all male.
WHEN LYNN MADE everyone’s plane reservations, she’d coordinated the flights so that her parents would be waiting at the gate when she and Tony arrived. She had a grand entrance in mind.
After the plane landed and people began leaving their seats, Tony leaned toward her. “Let’s give our boy Jeff a head start,” he said in an undertone.
Just then Jeff stood and laid a hand on Tony’s shoulder.
Lynn smothered a smile as Tony flinched.
Jeff leaned over, and the crystal on a cord around his neck dangled next to Tony’s ear. “Keep me posted,” Jeff said. “I’m there for you if you need a friend.”
“Right.” Tony didn’t look at him.
“See you later.” Jeff gave Tony’s shoulder a squeeze and moved into the aisle.
“Not if I see you first,” Tony muttered under his breath.
“Don’t worry,” Lynn said, taking pity on him. “Have you ever once met someone again after sitting next to them on a plane?”
“I guess you’re right. Is he gone?”
“He just walked out the door. I think we’re safe.”
“Then let’s go play heterosexual games for your parents’ benefit.”
Lynn’s heart pounded as she pulled her wheeled carry-on down the jetway with Tony close behind. As long as she focused on her parents’ threat of divorce, she’d be fine. To avoid that, she’d be willing to do almost anything. She knew they loved each other, and they’d be miserable if they separated. She’d be miserable, too. They’d been a trusted anchor all her life, and she wouldn’t give up that feeling of safety without a fight.
Just before she emerged from the jetway, she paused and turned to Tony. “Ready?”
“Yup. As soon as we’re clear of the tunnel, I’m putting my arm around you. Look adoring.”
“Adoring. Got it.” She stepped out of the jetway.
The next few seconds delivered one sensory shock after another. First, she glimpsed her mother, whose usual conservative hairstyle had been replaced by the electrocuted look. The wild red curls were at complete odds