Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. Avy Joseph

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You do not dwell on past losses and failures. You think you are a failure, helpless. You do not see yourself as a failure or as helpless. You think that you can help yourself to move forward. You think the future is hopeless, bleak and full of misery. You have hope for the future. What you do or what you feel like doing What you do or what you feel like doing You pull away from other people. You express how you feel about your loss or failure. You withdraw into your head. You look after yourself and your environment. You stop looking after yourself and your environment. You engage in healthy behaviours. You get rid of your emotions in destructive ways, e.g. alcohol or overeating.

ANGER/RAGE VERSUS ANNOYANCE

Unhealthy Negative Emotion	What the belief is about	Healthy Negative Emotion
Anger or rage	Loss or failure	Sadness
How you think		How you think
You exaggerate the actions of the person who has broken your personal rule.		You are balanced about the intention behind the thing that was done.
You think the other person's intentions were malicious.		You don't see malice.
You are right and the other person is definitely wrong.		You are open to being wrong.
You can't see the other person's point of view.		You can listen to the other person's point of view.
You think of how you can get your revenge.		You do not think of seeking revenge.
What you do or what you feel like doing		What you do or what you feel like doing
You physically attack.		You talk and behave in an assertive manner but with the right intent.
You verbally attack.		You ask the other person to make changes but you don't demand it.
You pay them back somehow, e.g. by ignoring them or staying silent. You recruit allies against the other person.

HURT VERSUS SORROW

Unhealthy Negative Emotion	What the belief is about	Healthy Negative Emotion
Hurt	Someone has treated you badly. You think you deserve to be treated better.	Sorrow
How you think		How you think
You exaggerate the unfairness of your treatment.		You think in a balanced way about the unfairness.
You think the other person does not care about you.		You do not think the other person does not care about you.
You think of yourself as unlovable or misunderstood.		You do not think of yourself as unlovable or misunderstood.
You remember the other times when you felt hurt.		You don't think about the other times when you felt hurt.
The other person must understand and make amends first.		You don't insist the other person has to make the first move.
What you do or what you feel like doing		What you do or what you feel like doing
You sulk and shut down.		You talk about how you feel in order to persuade the other person to behave more fairly.
You pick on the other person without telling them why.

GUILT VERSUS REMORSE

Unhealthy Negative Emotion	What the belief is about	Healthy Negative Emotion
Guilt	You have broken a moral code or the feelings of a significant person were hurt.	Remorse
How you think		How you think
You have definitely committed a sin.		You think about what you did and put it in context before you make a judgement.
You think you are more responsible Скачать книгу