You have yourself. Diary of a Tired Mom. Elena Tiranova

You have yourself. Diary of a Tired Mom - Elena Tiranova


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right, sometimes we forget that you also have your own boundaries and need to rest. I’m ready to take on some of the responsibilities and help you unload. We can work out a plan so that things are distributed more evenly, and you can get the rest you really deserve.

      Let’s work together as a team to lighten your burden and create balance in our family. I appreciate everything you do for us and our children, and I am ready to be a support for you in difficult moments. Kisses, see you later».

      Oh God, everything inside me was rejoicing at that very moment. It was one of the brightest and warmest moments for the first time in a long time. It seemed that for a moment we suddenly turned into that carefree, loving couple who once said «Yes» to each other, standing in the registry office. The fire was rekindled between us, and for the first time since the birth of my daughter, I was able to feel intimacy with my husband again.

      A moment of rest

      So, Saturday came. It was one of those beautiful days when the gentle morning sun was just rising above the world. It was at this very moment of creation that I decided to do something special for myself.

      My heartbeat quickened with excitement the moment I crossed the threshold of the apartment. What should I do? Where to go? Responding to an internal response, I headed to one of my favorite coffee shops, which was located not far from home. Looking around the counter with pleasure, I decided to stop at my favorite chocolate bar. So I decided to thank and encourage myself. When the first piece melted on my tongue, I felt real magic gently penetrating into every cell of my being. I enjoyed every bite, slowly and consciously, not sharing with anyone, not rushing anywhere. It was at this moment that I felt sincere joy and genuine bliss.

      «Where should I go next?» I thought. The decision came quickly enough – I wanted to go to a flower shop. By all means, I decided to buy myself a bouquet. For each of us, there is a way to please ourselves and confess our love. For me, these are flowers.

      My eyes were caught by a delicate composition of white and pink orchids, complemented by a combination of field ear, lisianthus and eucalyptus twigs. The natural combination plunged me into dreams. At that moment, I felt each flower touching my heart, filling it with warmth and magic. It seemed that with each breath I revived more and more and returned to myself. The bouquet became a symbol of my beauty and importance at the time of the walk, and upon returning home, it decorated my house with tenderness and fragrance.

      The next stop is a beauty salon. Many people get relaxation through a tactile communication channel, and I am no exception. That is why I entered the salon doors with anticipation of the master’s touch. Massaging movements not only relieve muscle tension, but also provide a slight surge of dopamine. I was lying on a soft table, closing my eyes and going into a world of deep peace. Every touch of the master enveloped my face with a feeling of tenderness and care, lulling music sounded in my ears. «I’m standing on the ocean shore: birds are flying overhead, and a mysterious ship is visible in the distance». The usual massage practice allowed you to completely let go of all worries and enjoy the current moment.

      Sometimes it takes very little to restore the necessary energy to the body and mind. Ask yourself, «What can please me right now? What can I do just for myself?» Simply follow your own desires: it can be a walk, a hot bath, or just a pack of your favorite cookies. Put Yourself first. At least for a little while.

      I was returning home happy, with a smile on my face. My last stop was at a bookstore. I had a small goal – to find a new notebook. A notebook for creativity, a notebook for dreams. I decided that from now on I will write down all my «I want» there. I did not seek salvation in this simple thing, but thanks to it I allowed myself to form an intention. My fingers glided lightly over the smooth pages of the notebook, as if they penetrated into the world of my thoughts and ideas.

      Filled with gratitude and love, I returned to my family. It was amazing how little it took me to relieve my fatigue. For the first time in a long time, I sincerely felt happiness and peace when I looked at my child, who was sleeping on my husband’s chest. It seemed that the retreating fatigue allowed me to feel the primordial again.

      In the dead of night, when everyone fell asleep, I took out my paints and canvas from the «bins». Surrendering to the judgment of my own imagination, I «danced» with a brush on the canvas. Each drop of paint came to life and told its own story, and I felt my soul blossom with each stroke. As it often happens, immersion in creativity allowed me to forget about time, to enjoy every next second. It is at such moments that we catch a certain sense of grounding, in which there is no place for worry, anxiety and anger.

      Sitting on the couch, I closed my eyes for a minute. The following picture appeared in my mind:

      I was standing on the bank of a beautiful river. There were tall trees to my left, creating a pleasant shade. To the right, there were blooming fields on an open plain. The warmth, the light breeze, the cool softness of the ground underfoot. The environment seemed to permeate every cell of my body.

      The water in the crystal-clear river shimmered in the sun like a thousand small diamonds. Its flow made me feel calm and peaceful. I watched its smooth flow with fascination. A whole natural concert seemed to grow up around me – the singing of birds, the rustle of leaves, the sound of water.

      After a little thought, I decided to follow the flow of the river. The water touched my feet, the freshness and coolness drove away any echoes of negative thoughts. It was a moment of unity. Unity with nature and myself. My path had no purpose, I trusted my heart. What awaits around the next corner?

      There was an atmosphere of real life in the air. Every breath was intense, I felt strength and confidence coming. Somewhere in the distance, I saw a bloom of unusual flowers. Nature, as a true creator, makes works of art. But it has her own tools.

      Finally, I reached the source of the river. As I came closer, I remembered many legends and tales that special water filled with healing power flows in the springs. The icy freshness of the water worked like an electric shock on my body. It was like an instantaneous renewal – bodily and spiritual. The moment of restoration and inner transformation.

      This vision plunged me into thought. According to folk myths, the image of the river symbolized the unity of all worlds: the beginning stream in the sky or underground was the connecting thread of the universe. The river is a symbol of dynamics, formation, and continuous development. At the same time, the eternal flow of water signifies stability, order, and peace. This ancient image contains great human strength, capable of overcoming any difficulties with composure and clear intention.

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