The Sign of the Spider. Mitford Bertram

The Sign of the Spider - Mitford Bertram


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spluttered.

      "It reminds me," he said, "of one voyage I made by this line. Some of the passengers got up what they called an 'Amusement Committee.'"

      "A fearful and wonderful monster!"

      "Just so. It's mission was to worry the soul out of each and all of us, in search of some nefarious gift. Oh, and we mustered plenty, from the 'cello to the 'bones.' Well, what is going on down there now is sheer delight in comparison. Imagine the present performance heaped up – only relieved by caterwauls of about equal quality – and that from 6 A. M. until 'lights out.'"

      "I don't want to imagine it, thank you, Holmes; so spare what little of that faculty I still retain. But, say now, when was this eventful voyage?"

      "In the summer of '84."

      "Precisely. I remember now. It was in the newspapers at the time that in more than one ship's log were entered strange reports of gruesome and wholly indefinable noises heard at night in certain latitudes. Some of the crews mutinied, and there was an instance on record of more than one hand, bursting with superstition, going mad and jumping overboard. So, you see, Holmes, your 'Amusement Committee' doubly deserved hanging."

      The delicious readiness of this "lie" so fetched Holmes that he opened his head and emitted a howl of laughter. He made such a row, in fact, that neither of them heard the convulsively half-repressed splutter which burst forth somewhere behind them.

      "Well, you were going to explain how it is you haven't got sick of the voyage yet," said Holmes, when his roar had subsided.

      "Was I? I didn't say so. What a chap you are for returning to worry a point, Holmes. However, I don't mind telling you. The fact is, I enjoy this voyage because it is so thoroughly and delightfully restful. You are not only allowed to do nothing, but are actually expected to perform that easy and congenial feat. There is nothing to worry you – absolutely nothing – not even a baby in the next cabin."

      "I don't mind a little worry now and then," objected the other, in the tone and with the look of one who was ignorant of the real meaning of the word. "It shakes one up a bit, don't you know – relieves the monotony of life."

      "Oh, does it? Look here, Holmes; I don't say it in an 'assert-my-superiority' sense, but I believe I'm a little older than you. Now, I've had a trifle too much of the commodity under discussion. In fact, I would take my chances of the monotony in order to dispense with any more of the other thing."

      Holmes cast a furtive and curious glance at his companion, but made no immediate reply. He was an average, good-looking, well-built specimen of Young England, and his healthy sun-burnt countenance showed, in its cheery serenity, that, as the other had hinted, he was not speaking from knowledge. At any rate, it was a marked contrast to the rather lined and prematurely careworn countenance of Laurence Stanninghame, even as his frank, jolly laugh was to the half-stifled grin which would lurk around the satirical corners of the latter's mouth when anything amused him.

      "What a row those women are making over there!" remarked Laurence, as peal after peal of feminine laughter went up from one of the groups above referred to.

      "That ass Swaynston, I suppose," growled the other. "Don't know what anybody can see funny about the fellow; he makes me sick. By the way, I haven't seen Miss Ormskirk on deck this morning."

      "That'll make Swaynston sick, won't it? Isn't he one of her poodles?"

      "Eh? Her what?"

      "Fetch and carry; stand up on his hind legs and beg. There – good dog! and all that sort of thing, you know; go to heel, too, when ordered."

      Holmes laughed again, this time in rather a shamefaced way, for he was conscious of having filled the rôle whose subserviency was thus pungently characterized by his cynical companion.

      "Oh, dash it all, Stanninghame, don't be such an old bear!" he burst forth. "A fellow can't help doing things for a devilish pretty girl, eh?"

      "A good many fellows can't, apparently, for this one. Directly she appears on the scene they go at her like flies at a honey pot. There's the doctor, and the fourth brass-button man – er, I beg his pardon, the fourth 'officer,' – and Swaynston, and yourself, and Heaven knows how many more. And one gets hold of a cushion – which she doesn't want; another a wrap – of which the same holds good; two of you strive to rend a deck-chair limb from limb in your eagerness to dump it down on the very last spot in the ship where she desires to sit, what time you are all scowling at each other as though there was not room for any given two of you in the same world. I don't want to hurt your feelings, Holmes, but, upon my word, it's the most d – ridiculous spectacle on earth."

      "I don't see why it should be," was the half-snuffy rejoinder. "There's nothing ridiculous in common civility."

      "No, only to see you all treading on each other's heels to do konza to a woman who's nearly losing her life trying not to laugh at the crowd of you."

      "Hallo! what's this?" sung out Holmes, not sorry for an excuse to change the subject. "Why, you used a Zulu word, Stanninghame, and yet you say you never were in South Africa before."

      "Well, and then? I've once or twice known fellows use a Greek word who had never been near the land of Socrates in their lives."

      "Still, that's different. Every fellow learns Greek at school, but no fellow learns Zulu, eh?"

      "You can't swear to that. Well, never mind. Perhaps I have been mugging it up as a preliminary to coming out here. Note, however, Holmes, that I used the word advisedly. Konza does not mean to show civility, but to do homage, and that of a tolerably abject kind – in fact, to knuckle under."

      "All the same, I believe you have been out here before," went on Holmes, staring at him with a new interest. "Only you're such a mysterious chap that you won't let on."

      "Have it so, if you will. Only, aren't you rather drawing a red herring across the trail, Holmes? We were talking about Miss Ormskirk."

      "Um – yes, so we were. But, have you talked to her at all, Stanninghame? I believe even you would be fetched if you did."

      "H'm – well, I'd better leave it alone then, hadn't I, seeing that I undertook this voyage not for love, but for money? What's her name, by the way?"

      Holmes stared. "Her name," he began – "Oh – er – I see; her other name? By Jove! it's an odd one. Lilith."

      "An old one too; the oldest she-name on record, bar none."

      "What? How does that come in?"

      "Tradition hath it that Lilith was Adam's first wife. That makes it the oldest she-name on record, doesn't it?"

      "Of course. What a rum chap you are, Stanninghame! Now, I wonder how many fellows could have told one that?"

      "Well, I am a 'know-a-little-of-everything,' they tell me," said Laurence, without a shade of self-complacency. "But, I say, what do these two want bothering around? Not another subscription already?"

      Two individuals, armed with mysterious pencil and paper, were moving from group to group, with a word to each. The hawk-like profile of the one bespoke his nationality if not his tribe, even as the pug-nosed, squab-faced figure-head of the other spoke to his.

      "It's the 'sweep,'" said Holmes, with kindling interest. "They're going to draw it in the smoke-room. Come along and see it. It'll be something to do."

      "But I don't want something to do. I want to do nothing, as I told you just now, and – Hallo! By George, he's gone!"

      One glance at the retreating Holmes, who was making all sail for the smoke-room, and Laurence tranquilly resumed his former occupation – gazing out over the blue-green surface, to wit. Not long, however, was he to be left to the enjoyment of the same.

      "Can I have this chair? Is it anybody's?"

      He turned, but did not start at the voice, which was soft and well modulated. The two deck-chairs had been backed against the companion, in whose doorway now stood framed the form of the speaker.

      Rather tall, of exquisite proportions, billowing in splendid curves from the perfectly round waist, the form was about as complete an example of


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