The Consolidator; or, Memoirs of Sundry Transactions from the World in the Moon. Defoe Daniel
Climate, and he was just a going to it, and would take me with him.
He told me in General, the Country was Good, Wholsome, Fruitful, rarely Scituate for Trade, extraordinarily Accommodated with Harbours, Rivers and Bays for Shipping; full of Inhabitants; for it had been Peopled from all Parts, and had in it some of the Blood of all the Nations in the Moon.
He told me, as the Inhabitants were the most Numerous, so they were the strangest People that liv'd; both their Natures, Tempers, Qualities, Actions, and way of Living, was made up of innumerable Contradictions: That they were the Wisest Fools, and the Foolishest Wise Men in the World; the Weakest Strongest, Richest Poorest, most Generous Covetous, Bold Cowardly, False Faithful, Sober Dissolute, Surly Civil, Slothful Diligent, Peaceable Quarrelling, Loyal Seditious Nation that ever was known.
Besides my Observations which I made my self, and which could only furnish me with what was present, and which I shall take time to inform my Reader with as much Care and Conciseness as possible; I was beholding to this Old Lunarian, for every thing that was Historical or Particular.
And First, He inform'd me, That in this new Country they had very seldom any Clouds at all, and consequently no extraordinary Storms, but a constant Serenity, moderate Breezes cooled the Air, and constant Evening Exhalations kept the Earth moist and fruitful; and as the Winds they had were various and strong enough to assist their Navigation, so they were without the Terrors, Dangers, Ship-wrecks and Destructions, which he knew we were troubled with in this our Lunar World, as he call'd it.
The first just Observation I made of this was, That I suppos'd from hence the wonderful Clearness of the Air, and the Advantage of so vast Optick Capacities they enjoy'd, was obtained: Alas! says the Old Fellow, You see nothing to what some of our Great Eyes see in some Parts of this World, nor do you see any thing compar'd to what you may see by the help of some new Invented Glasses, of which I may in time let you see the Experiment; and perhaps you may find this to be the reason why we do not so abound in Books as in your Lunar World; and that except it be some extraordinary Translations out of your Country, you will find but little in our Libraries, worth giving you a great deal of Trouble.
We immediately quitted the Philosophical Discourse of Winds, and I began to be mighty Inquisitive after these Glasses and Translations, and 1st, I understood here was a strange sort of Glass that did not so much bring to the Eye, as by I know not what wonderful Operation carried out the Eye to the Object, and quite varies from all our Doctrine of Opticks, by forming several strange Phænomena in Sight, which we are utterly unacquainted with; nor could Vision, Rarification, or any of our School-mens fine Terms, stand me in any stead in this case; but here was such Additions of piercing Organs, Particles of Transparence, Emission, Transmission, Mediums, Contraction of Rays, and a Thousand Applications of things prepar'd for the wondrous Operation, that you may be sure are requisite for the bringing to pass something yet unheard of on this side the Moon.
First we were inform'd, by the help of these Glasses, strange things, which pass in our World for Non-Entities, is to be seen, and very perceptible; for Example:
State Polity, in all its Meanders, Shifts, Turns, Tricks, and Contraries, are so exactly Delineated and Describ'd, That they are in hopes in time to draw a pair of Globes out, to bring all those things to a certainty.
Not but that it made some Puzzle, even among these Clear-sighted Nations, to determine what Figure the Plans and Drafts of this undiscover'd World of Mysteries ought to be describ'd in: Some were of Opinion, it ought, to be an Irregular Centagon, a Figure with an Hundred Cones or Angles: Since the Unaccountables of this State-Science, are hid in a Million of undiscover'd Corners; as the Craft, Subtilty and Hypocrisy of Knaves and Courtiers have concealed them, never to be found out, but by this wonderful D-l-scope, which seem'd to threaten a perfect Discovery of all those Nudities, which have lain hid in the Embrio, and false Conceptions of Abortive Policy, ever since the Foundation of the World.
Some were of Opinion, this Plan ought to be Circular, and in a Globular Form, since it was on all sides alike, full of dark Spots, untrod Mazes, waking Mischiefs, and sleeping Mysteries; and being delineated like the Globes display'd, would discover all the Lines of Wickedness to the Eye at one view: Besides, they fancied some sort of Analogy in the Rotundity of the Figure, with the continued Circular Motion of all Court-Policies, in the stated Round of Universal Knavery.
Others would have had it Hyrogliphical as by a Hand in Hand, the Form representing the Affinity between State Policy here, and State Policy in the Infernal Regions, with some unkind Similies between the Oeconomy of Satan's Kingdom, and those of most of the Temporal Powers on Earth; but this was thought too unkind. At last it was determin'd, That neither of these Schemes were capable of the vast Description; and that, therefore, the Drafts must be made single, tho' not dividing the Governments, yet dividing the Arts of Governing into proper distinct Schemes, viz.
1. A particular Plan of Publick Faith; and here we had the Experiment immediately made: The Representation is quallified for the Meridian of any Country, as well in our World as theirs; and turning it to'ards our own World, there I saw plainly an Exchequer shut up, and 20000 Mourning Families selling their Coaches, Horses, Whores, Equipages, &c. for Bread, the Government standing by laughing, and looking on: Hard by I saw the Chamber of a great City shut up, and Forty Thousand Orphans turn'd adrift in the World; some had no Cloaths, some no Shoes, some no Money; and still the City Magistrates calling upon other Orphans, to pay their money in. These things put me in mind of the Prophet Ezekiel, and methoughts I heard the same Voice that spoke to him, calling me, and telling me, Come hither, and I'll show thee greater Abominations than these: So looking still on that vast Map, by the help of these Magnifying Glasses, I saw huge Fleets hir'd for Transport-Service, but never paid; vast Taxes Anticipated, that were never Collected; others Collected and Appropriated, but Misapplied: Millions of Talleys struck to be Discounted, and the Poor paying 40 per Cent, to receive their Money. I saw huge Quantities of Money drawn in, and little or none issued out; vast Prizes taken from the Enemy, and then taken away again at home by Friends; Ships sav'd on the Sea, and sunk in the Prize Offices; Merchants escaping from Enemies at Sea, and be Pirated by Sham Embargoes, Counterfeit Claims, Confiscations, &c a-shoar: There we saw Turkey-Fleets taken into Convoys, and Guarded to the very Mouth of the Enemy, and then abandon'd for their better Security: Here we saw Mons. Pouchartrain shutting up the Town-house of Paris, and plundring the Bank of Lyons.
2. Here we law the State of the War among Nations; Here was the French giving Sham-thanks for Victories they never got, and some body else adressing and congratulating the sublime Glory of running away: Here was Te Deum for Sham-Victories by Land; and there was Thanksgiving for Ditto by Sea: Here we might see two Armies fight, both run away, and both come and thank GOD for nothing: Here we saw a Plan of a late War like that in Ireland; there was all the Officers cursing a Dutch General, because the damn'd Rogue would fight, and spoil a good War, that with decent Management and good Husbandry, might have been eek't out this Twenty Years; there was whole Armies hunting two Cows to one Irishman, and driving of black Cattle declar'd the Noble End of the the War: Here we saw a Country full of Stone Walls and strong Towns, where every Campaign, the Trade of War was carried on by the Soldiers, with the same Intriguing as it was carried on in the Council Chambers; there was Millions of Contributions raised, and vast Sums Collected, but no Taxes lessen'd; whole Plate Fleets surpriz'd, but no Treasure found; vaft Sums lost by Enemies, and yet never found by Friends, Ships loaded with Volatile Silver, that came away full, and gat home empty; whole Voyages made to beat No body, and plunder Every body; two Millions robb'd from the honest Merchants, and not a Groat sav'd for the honest Subjects: There we saw Captains Lifting Men with the Governments Money, and letting them go again for their own; Ships fitted out at the Rates