Broken Open. Lauren Dane
off her work light. “Hey. I just put on a new pot of coffee. It should be done in a few minutes. Any word on Maddie?”
“I’d say I couldn’t believe you’re here, but that’s a lie. I wish you weren’t but I knew you would be. Anyway.” Natalie held up a hand to stop Tuesday from arguing. References to Tuesday’s chronic insomnia weren’t new. “Maddie’s awake and in good spirits according to Paddy. He, Ezra and Damien are heading to the hospital and will meet us at the arena later. Mary is riding with us but I can tell you she’s currently in her kitchen cooking for everyone at the hospital. I’m going to guess she’ll want to go early so we can all eat together and then go to the show. Would that work for you?”
It had been a little odd to see Natalie make a friendship with Mary. She was part of Natalie’s life in a way Tuesday couldn’t be. Which was so good for her to have that sort of support within the Hurley family ranks. But there were times it smarted just a little.
It was also undeniable that Mary was a lovely person who cared about her family and Tuesday liked the Hurleys very much.
“Sounds like a good idea. I’m sure it’ll make Mary feel better. It’ll give everyone a chance to rest and eat after the stress of the hospital. Also, I can’t lie—I want to peep at this Kelly character.” Tuesday put her tools aside and came around to where Natalie had dropped into a chair near the counter.
The coffeemaker beeped. “Hold that thought. Coffee’s ready.”
Tuesday poured them both a mug and brought them over with some sugar.
“Just let me know when you want to leave. I managed to finish two pieces this morning and a customer picked up some frames a while back. So I’m good to close up whenever.”
Tuesday had finally accepted Nat’s invitation to visit the small town her best friend had moved to because she needed an anchor or she was worried she’d float away. Or to be fair it was more like she was beginning to not be worried about floating away and that brought her to the person she knew would see just how messed up Tuesday was and how much she needed to have someone refuse to let her spin bullshit anymore about being fine.
She hadn’t been fine then. Though she’d got better since, when she’d first slept in Natalie’s guest room and let herself accept that it could be her reality, that she could move to Hood River. It had been a step back into a life she actually lived instead of something that happened while she hid from it.
She knew how to frame things. Did a lovely job with it because she had a knack for what looked right for each person and back in high school she’d worked for a frame place at the mall so she had the skill set. Her custom work and the other pieces she sold on consignment of preframed art brought in enough to pay her half of the mortgage.
But what she really truly wanted to do was make jewelry full-time. Big, chunky pieces of a wide variety of shades, shapes and textures. She had a stall at a local farmers’ market and had been slowly building a customer base that way. She also had heard recently that a big outdoor market in Portland had given her a spot for a stall starting the following month. The exposure was on a far broader scale. She felt more alive and full of hope for the future right then than she had since about a year before Eric had died.
“I’ve seen a picture of her.” Natalie leaned an elbow on the counter, tearing Tuesday from her memories. “Kelly. Did you know she was a model?” Nat wandered off topic. “You know what would be really good with this coffee? A cinnamon roll. Even a cookie. Oatmeal, which is healthy even.” Natalie smiled brightly and Tuesday snorted.
“I have almonds and some apples.”
“I said good, not apples and almonds.” She frowned, still managing to look gorgeous. “So for God’s sake, tell me about it. Tell me how you feel after last night,” Natalie burst out.
“I’m hungry. Come on. Let’s lock up and I’ll make pancakes.”
“Wow, you so don’t want to talk about it.”
Tuesday put a cloth over the work she’d been doing and slid the tray into a drawer. “I’m still processing it. I feel fine. He’s...well, you know.” She threw her hands up, frustrated that he was so appealing. “I don’t know. We haven’t even actually fucked yet. We barely know one another.”
Natalie washed out the coffee stuff as she spoke over her shoulder, “You and Ezra know each other. You have since that first meeting. I see the way you look at each other, the way you circle and get all flushed. I’ve been going out with Paddy since July of last year and in all that time I’ve never seen Ezra with a woman. Or talk about a woman. Other than you.”
“Pause the lecture.” Tuesday turned off the interior lights except the security ones and then hit the alarm before returning to gather her things and lock up.
“I’m sure you walked so I’m up here.” Natalie pointed to her car.
Natalie started in again once they got on their way home. “And you, well you’ve built a wall around your heart.”
Tuesday held up a hand Natalie couldn’t see because she was driving. But her friend would know it was happening anyway. “I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Too bad. I’ve let you avoid it for way too long.”
“Natalie, I can’t do this right now. Everything is fine. We will eventually have sex and I will fill you in on it and that will be that. We’ll do it awhile and it’ll wear off and we’ll be those people who fuck every once in a while when they need it from someone they can trust to be a good time but not develop feelings.”
“Oh god. Seriously? This is how you’re going to play this thing? You and Ezra are fuckbuddies? You bang awhile and then you see each other all the time and it’s totally hunky-dory?”
“I’ve seen people I’ve had sex with in town or around and I don’t burst into tears that I never bore their children, Natalie.”
“Don’t get defensive with me. I know your tricks. When Paddy first came around, you told me to let him in because I didn’t have anything to lose. I’m saying that to you now. Let this be good. You deserve that. You can’t just let that part of you die.”
“I’m not some sort of defective goods, Nat.”
Natalie parked and they went into the house, heading to the kitchen, where they began to ready for the pancakes Tuesday had promised.
Neither of them spoke as they moved through the kitchen, washing hands, tying on aprons, getting the griddle heating and then mixing up the pancake batter. Natalie was a horrible cook so she gathered ingredients and then cleaned them up when Tuesday finished.
As they did all this, Natalie put out all the items they’d need with just a little too much force because she was pissed off. Normally, this was the place Natalie had stopped when the topic of Tuesday beginning to date again came up.
But things had shifted over the past year or so and it seemed pretty apparent to Tuesday that Natalie was going to push some more.
The problem was that Tuesday could lie to herself better than she could lie to Natalie. Which was also a testament to the friendship they’d had since the first day of college. They’d celebrated so many things together, grieved others, like the unthinkable when, four years prior, Tuesday’s husband had been diagnosed with cancer and had died three months later.
Through it all, through grief so deep it was simply inescapable, through that numb place she’d floated into, it was Natalie who’d grabbed hold and gave her roots. Friendship that saw everything and loved because of it saved her over and over.
So she couldn’t lie to Natalie because Natalie understood Tuesday’s grief and her avoidance behavior, too.
Once they’d settled at the table with a heaping platter of pancakes between them and two big glasses of orange juice, they began to talk again.
“He’s sexy. I