Wyoming Strong. Diana Palmer
She wanted to move away. She really did. But the feel of him so close to her, the smell of him, familiar and dear, the hard warmth of his mouth teasing hers, made her reckless. She’d never really wanted a man to kiss her. But she loved it when Wolf did. He made the bad memories go away.
His fingers were tracing up and down her long neck, making sensuous little patterns while his mouth smoothed over her lips.
“You could become an addiction,” he whispered. “That would be the worst thing I could do to you.”
Her eyes opened wide on his face, seeing it harden, seeing his eyes glitter.
“I mean it,” he said roughly. “I hate brunettes. I wouldn’t mean to take out old vendettas on you, but I might not be able to help it.” His mouth crushed down on hers briefly and then lifted. “She liked to make me crazy in bed, then she laughed at me when I lost control and went over the edge.”
She caught her breath at the images that flashed through her mind.
“I don’t think she ever felt a damned thing. But she pretended that she did, at first. She told me she was a virgin. She even acted like one...”
He jerked away from Sara. His pale eyes were glittery on her face. “Just like you,” he said in a rough undertone. “Backing away to make me come close then pretending that I got through her defenses, that I wasn’t like the other men who frightened her.”
She began to understand what Gabriel meant. She felt a sense of loss. This man was far more damaged even than she was.
“Have you ever had therapy?” she asked sadly.
“Therapy.” He laughed out loud. “I had two years of a woman ridiculing me every time I lay in her arms, making me beg for satisfaction. Can damned therapy fix that?” he asked in a rasping tone.
She winced.
“So I date blondes. They don’t come with bad memories, and I can make them lose control, make them beg me.” He smiled coldly. “Payback.”
She had a sick feeling deep inside. He would do that to her, if they ever became involved. He would make her pay for those scars the other woman had given him. She hadn’t realized until then that she felt different with him than she ever had with other men.
“Have I shocked you?” he asked sarcastically.
“Yes,” she replied softly. “I...haven’t ever... Well, that’s not quite true.” She lowered her eyes. “My stepfather tried to have me. He was brutal and vulgar and there was a trial... I had to testify against him. He went to prison.”
“Did you tease him?” he asked coldly. “Drive him crazy until he had to do something about it?”
Why had she thought he might feel differently than other men had? She laughed softly to herself. She took off his jacket and handed it to him. “I’m sure that’s what I did,” she replied. “It must have been my fault.”
He couldn’t see her face. He didn’t realize that she was being sarcastic. “Poor damned fool,” he bit off. “Just don’t think you’ll ever get the opportunity to try it out on me.”
“Mr. Patterson,” she said with ragged pride, “it would never occur to me that you’d be that stupid. Excuse me.”
She brushed by him and went into the civic center. She found Gabriel standing by the punch bowl. She was poised, but very pale.
“I’d like to go home, please,” she said in a haunted tone.
Gabriel looked over her head at Wolf Patterson’s cold expression. He glared at his friend, but Sara looked as if she couldn’t take any more.
“Yes,” he told her. “Come on.”
* * *
SHE MADE COFFEE. They sat at the kitchen table and drank it.
“What did he say to you?”
“The usual things.” She sighed. “But he did tell me about the woman...”
“Ysera?”
She looked up. “Is that her name?”
He nodded. His face was grim. “We hated her. We knew what she was doing to him, but you can’t drag a man away from a woman he thinks he’s in love with. She damned near destroyed him.” He frowned. “He’s never spoken of it to anyone. Not even to me. I know about it from a girl who worked with her. She thought Ysera was warped, mentally. I have to agree.”
“He told me about her to warn me off,” she said. She shook her head. “I can’t imagine a man putting up with that.”
“He loved her,” he said simply.
She drew in a breath and sipped coffee. “He said that he didn’t think therapy could do anything for him.” She flushed.
“What else did he say?”
She laughed hollowly. “That I must have teased our stepfather until he went crazy to have me.”
“I’ll break his damned neck!”
“You will not,” she said, pulling his shirtsleeve to make him sit back down. “He doesn’t know a thing about me. It’s what even one of my friends thought.”
“You were thirteen!”
She winced. “Maybe I wore shorts too much...”
“Oh, God, don’t do that to yourself!” he burst out. “You were a child, far more innocent than most girls your age. He’d been after you for months.”
“I didn’t tell you that!” she exclaimed, embarrassed.
“The prosecutor told me,” he replied. “He was livid. He said they should have the death penalty for cases like yours.”
She lowered her eyes to the table. “I have no peace. I have nightmares.” She smiled sadly. “There’s this man I play WoW with,” she recalled. “He says he has nightmares, too. Of course, he could be a woman or a man or a child, I don’t really know, but he...he gives me peace. We get along so well together. He said that he couldn’t get away from the past. I know how that feels.”
He didn’t dare tell her that her WoW friend was none other than Wolf Patterson. The player was the only real confidant she had, besides Gabriel. It was one of the only happy things in her sad life, that game. Perhaps it was the only thing Wolf had, as well.
“Do you know who he is in the real world?” he asked conversationally.
“Oh, no. I don’t want to,” she added. “The game isn’t like real life. We just have fun playing together, like children.” She laughed. “It’s so funny. I don’t have friends, you know. But I have a friend in him. I can talk to him. Not that we go into specifics. But he’s a compassionate person.”
“So are you.”
She smiled. “I try to be.”
“Sara, do you understand now why I told you that you can’t afford to let Wolf get close to you?”
She nodded.
“Someone said that Ted got insistent about dancing with you,” he said abruptly.
“Yes. He tried to drag me out onto the dance floor,” she replied uneasily. “Mr. Patterson caught him by the collar and almost threw him into a wall.” She shivered. “He’s scary when he loses his temper.”
“Only because he never loses it,” Gabriel replied. “That’s one man you don’t ever want to make mad. Well, if you’re a man, that is. I’ve never known him to hurt a woman.” He studied her. “He was aggressive with Ted?”
“Yes.”
He didn’t want to make the obvious assumption, but it presented itself just the same. Ted was trying