Starstruck. Lauren Conrad
her eyes up to the ceiling, which was stained acoustic tile. “Can’t wait,” she muttered.
Glory either didn’t hear her, or else she chose to ignore Madison’s lack of enthusiasm. “We accept challenging pets,” she went on. “Lost Paws is the place that people come when they have no other options. When you meet some of these animals, you’re going to have to remind yourself: It might be ugly or it might be mean—or, honestly, it might be both—but every animal in here deserves to be taken care of and loved. Remembering that makes a big difference. These animals are in some of the most difficult circumstances of their lives. They’re in cages. They’re frightened. Even though we do our best to try to take care of them, we are a shelter. We are not a home.” She looked at all of them, her vivacity suddenly muted. “Our job is to make this feel as much like a home as possible.”
Madison suppressed another eye roll. Was this lady for real or was this speech for the cameras?
“Sounds good to me,” said the guy with the giant forearms. “I dig it.”
Madison decided instantly that she hated him.
“So let’s go around the room and introduce ourselves, all right?” she said.
Forearms said his name was Stan. The twins were Hazel and Ivy, and the raisin said that her name was Sharon. Madison felt she needed no introduction, but she offered her name anyway. It was clear that neither Stan nor Sharon had heard of her before (well, she never claimed to be a hit with the Geritol crowd), but Hazel and Ivy gazed at her with what seemed like awe.
Madison offered them a small, haughty smile, which neither of them returned. She assumed that they were star-struck. Maybe, if she was feeling generous, she’d give them an autograph later.
“So we’re going to divide and conquer now,” Glory said, before the gorgeous guy had had a chance to say his name. “Let’s get you your assignments.”
Madison looked down at her industrial-strength gloves and wondered why she was the only person who had been given a pair. They looked like the kind of thing you’d wear if you were going to clean up hazardous waste.
Glory’s voice was brisk and efficient. “Stan, I’m going to give you to the Great Danes. They need a walk—and a strong person to do it. Sharon, you’re going to work with me in intake, greeting people and getting them started on their paperwork. Hazel and Ivy, you’ll be in the Family Room, which is where we work on animal socialization. All right, shall we?”
“Excuse me,” Madison said briskly. “What about us?” She indicated the hot guy in the corner.
Glory shook her head. “Wait here. I’ll take you to your duties after I introduce Stan to the Great Danes, Billy and Spike.”
She turned and left, with the other volunteers following her. As Hazel (or was it Ivy?) passed by her, Madison readied herself to smile again. She had to be nice to her fans, even under these unfortunate circumstances. But the girl stared out from beneath her greasy bangs and said, “Scarlett should have challenged you to a cage match, you backstabbing bitch.”
Madison flinched. That wasn’t what she’d expected. But she sat up straighter and smiled. “Sure,” she said sweetly. “And I would have kicked her skinny, angsty college ass.” Then she turned away and stared at the ancient coffeemaker and the dusty vending machine until Glory returned.
When she did, Madison held out the gloves. “These must be for Stan, right? The guy with the arms? Because they’re giant.”
Glory smiled pertly. “Nope. They’re for you. Try them on.”
Reluctantly Madison did as she was told. What was she going to have to do? The gloves were much too big and they smelled like a petroleum by-product. She flexed her fingers. “I feel like my hands are paws.”
“Then maybe it’ll give you some empathy for the animals,” Glory said.
“I have plenty of empathy,” Madison retorted.
“Oh, I’m sure you do, dear.” But bubbly Glory sounded pretty darn sarcastic.
Madison decided not to pick a fight. She could convince these people of her compassion some other time. Or … not. Whatever. “Anyway,” she said. “Show me which cute little puppy you want me to walk.”
Over in the corner, that gorgeous guy made a noise in his throat. Was it a cough? A laugh? Madison couldn’t be sure.
“Uh, right,” Glory said. “Come with me.”
The cameras followed them down a narrow hallway lined with laundry hampers and mop buckets. Wild barking was coming from somewhere, and from somewhere else, a terrible, high keening that sounded almost human.
“Here we go,” Glory said brightly. She opened a heavy metal door and gestured for Madison to walk in.
The room was windowless; it held stacks of metal cages. The air was thick with excremental stench, and Madison nearly stumbled from the olfactory assault.
“But there aren’t any animals in here,” she said, her voice tight. She didn’t want to open her lips very much because she was afraid of letting the horrible smell into her mouth.
“Nope!” Glory said. “But there will be. And that’s why I need you to clean these cages.” She pulled a bucket and a giant bottle of bleach down from a shelf. “The water in that faucet is cold,” she said, pointing to the small industrial sink. “If you want hot, you’ll have to hoof it back to the break room.” She gave Madison what was clearly an insincere smile. “All set, then?”
Madison was so shocked that she didn’t even know what to say. And by the time she thought of something—Wait, what? Are you kidding me? Get me a kitten to pet, stat!—Glory was gone.
She stood silently in the dank, smelly room, surrounded by metal bars and shining locks. She looked in panic at Bret, the cameraman, and noticed he had a bandana wrapped over his face to mask the smell. It felt, she realized suddenly, a lot like jail. But jail, no doubt, was nicer.
“I’m not doing this,” she yelled to the empty room. “I am so not doing this!”
It was all she could do not to turn to Bret and mouth “What the fuck?” There was no way in hell she was going to clean all these cages. She remained motionless in the center of the room for a minute, and then she stormed back into the hallway. The camera quickly followed behind her. She found Glory by the front desk, showing one of the twins how to work the computer.
“No way,” Madison said. “You can’t make me do that.”
Glory looked up, her eyes glittering. “Oh, but yes, my dear, I can. This is your court-ordered community service. You can either clean those cages, or you can go back to the judge and see what other punishments he can find for you. I hear they need people at the morgue….”
Madison shuddered.
“Anyway,” Glory said. “I don’t make the job assignments. Ryan does.”
“Who’s Ryan?” Madison demanded.
“You’ll meet him later,” Glory said. “Now go clean.”
The next three hours were pure hell. Madison nearly passed out twice from the stench of the dirty cages. She broke a nail, and the soapy water destroyed her Chanel flats. (She made a note to wear her Jimmy Choo hunter boots the next time around.) And no one came to check on her, to see if she was hungry or if she needed help or if she could use a break. She threw a mini fit around lunch-time, but only the PopTV camera paid any attention.
By the fourth hour, Madison was cursing to herself. “I think we’re done here,” said Bret. “The smell is kind of getting to me. And they said it’ll probably take you the rest of the day to finish.” He looked thrilled to be leaving, and no wonder.
So now Madison was utterly alone. Until she turned around and saw the hot guy she’d spotted earlier, leaning in the doorway.
“Oh,