The Future Homemakers of America. Laurie Graham
must have just ruined their teeth. ‘May Gotobed’s seen them,’ she said. ‘She’s stood as close to them as I am to you. She’s been a backstairs maid, donkey’s years, since the old king was alive.’
Betty said, ‘Oh boy! A backstairs maid! You hear that, Peggy? Go on! Tell us more!’
‘Well,’ she said, ‘May was on her way up with hot water when they found him. She seen him Tuesday night. He was outside having a smoke. Wednesday, she was carrying water up for a lady of the bedchamber and word come, Dr Ansell been sent for. Nothing he could do, of course. King was long gone. And the Duke of Gloucester, he come over directly in his motor car. That’s a cheery shade,’ she said, stroking Lois’s sleeve.
People were leaving. Just walking away into the mist.
Betty said, ‘I just love hearing about all this. I am the biggest fan of your royal family. I have so many pictures, especially of your Princess Margaret. She just looks such a sweet girl. Do you know any stories about her?’
The old guy called Jim was still there, hanging back, watching us. ‘Time you were getting off home, Kath Pharaoh. Careless talk costs lives.’
‘War ended, 1945, Jim,’ she said. ‘Haven’t you heard?’
We offered her a ride, but she came over shy. Looked flustered and said there was no need, she didn’t have far to go. Audrey called to the guy. ‘How about you?’ she said. ‘We have room for a small one.’
‘Save yer juice,’ he said, and both of them disappeared, him in one direction and Kath Pharaoh in the other. And there we stood in the freezing mist, the four of us, feeling about as welcome as a pack of prairie dogs.
Betty gave me one of her pretty-please looks. ‘Oh, Peggy, let’s go catch up to her, can we? Get her number, at least? I’d love to talk with her some more.’
It was all one to me because I needed to drive on and find a safe turning place, highways in England not being proper highways at all.
Lois said, ‘Heaven’s sakes, Betty. She’s gone. Let’s find a bar. Get ourselves a little inner warmth?’
But we soon found her, stepping out at a real brisk pace. It was her flag we saw first, sticking out of the top of her shopping bag. Betty wound her window down. ‘Hi again! We seem to be going your way. Are you sure we can’t give you a ride home?’
She had a dewdrop hanging from the end of her nose. ‘Go on, then,’ she said, and she tried to open Lois’s door, just tugging on it.
Betty leaped out. ‘No, no, you ride in front,’ she said, ‘then you can tell Peggy which way to go. Lois, move over.’
She got in. I looked at her, waiting for her to tell me which way to go, but she just sat there, so I just kept driving.
‘Well now, we should all introduce ourselves.’ Betty was bubbling. She was so happy we’d adopted somebody who knew a servant who’d breathed the same air as a real king. ‘I’m Betty. This here is Lois, and Audrey. We’re from the United States. Our husbands are stationed at the air base.’
Kath nodded. She was tongue-tied.
I said, ‘And I’m Peggy. Guess I’m just the driver around here.’
She smiled. ‘Do you take Blackdyke Drove,’ she said, ‘you’d best go steady. That’s all frez.’
I didn’t know what in tarnation she was talking about, but I soon found out.
‘My name’s Kath,’ she said, ‘Kath Pharaoh. Ah. Now you’ve gone and driv past the turn. That’s easy done, when you’re moving along so fast.’
Blackdyke Drove was just a track, when we found it again. The ground fell away from it, either side, and disappeared into the mist, and the mud had a frosting of ice that crackled under the wheels. I never got out of second gear, but Kath held on to the dash anyway and once or twice her hand came across towards the steering column, like she wanted to guide me.
‘What make of car would this be, then?’ she asked me. She’d been peering down into the foot-well. ‘So, that’s the go-faster pedal and that’s the go-slower pedal,’ she said. ‘I reckon as I could soon git the hang of that. But how does the juice make the wheels go round? That’s a mystery to me. And what’s this?’ She hit the horn. ‘Oh, beg your pardon,’ she said, laughing, and gave me another good look at her poor English teeth. ‘That’s enough to waken the dead,’ she said. ‘That’s enough to waken him indoors. STOP!’
I felt the tail slide a little and I heard Audrey’s head crack against her window.
‘See? You nearly went past,’ she said, real accusing. And there it was. Another sway-back house, hunkered down low, just like Gayle and Audrey’s billet out at Smeeth.
I said, ‘This your place, Kath?’
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Your friend all right, in the back?’
Audrey said it was no more than a tap and her head was just fine, but Lois thought a little drink would be a good idea. Lois often did.
‘You could have delayed shock, Aud,’ she said. ‘Is there a bar, some place near? One of those thatched taverns?’
‘There’s the Flying Dutchman,’ she said. ‘You don’t want to go in there, though. That’s for men. I could make you a nice cuppa tea.’
Betty loved that idea. ‘Then we can keep Audrey under observation,’ she said. ‘Check she doesn’t have a concussion. And I would just adore to visit with a real English family.’
Lois said a Norfolk fen was the last place on earth she’d want to be with any kinda medical condition. She said she’d want to be right back where Uncle Sam’d take good care of her, but Betty was out of the car already, and Audrey wasn’t far behind.
‘Come on!’ she said. ‘It’ll be interesting. See how other people live. And, by the way, I do not have a concussion.’
Kath seemed kinda proud to be taking us home, like it was Sand-ringham Palace itself. Course, in those days she didn’t know what lovely homes American people had, and ignorance is bliss.
I’ve often thought, if that king hadn’t died when he did, I don’t suppose we’d ever have met Kath or gone driving up that frozen track. We’d just have stayed home and baked cookies, and then a whole lot of things would have turned out different.
‘John Pharaoh,’ she shouted, ‘we’ve got company. Come out here and see this fancy motor.’
We filed in, and Aud had to duck her head. Those ceilings were so low she nearly ended up with a concussion after all. It was dark inside. We pushed through a narrow passageway, old coats hanging on pegs.
‘Come on in,’ she said. ‘You’ll have to take us as you find us.’
I could see a wood-range, and a bed, with somebody on it, but my eyes were still getting accustomed to the gloom.
‘I seen the train,’ she said. ‘We give him a good send-off. Jim Jex was down there, said did you want a pup off of his fowling dog, I said no thank you, and these ladies kindly brought me home. They’re from Drampton, with the Yankee Air Force, and you should see the big fancy car they got, windows that go up and down and all sorts. Dear God, that smells like a old hoiley in here. John? You awake?’
First impression was, they only had one room. Later on, when I knew them better, I saw the place where he kept his eel traps. Another little room that could have been fixed up, for a bedroom or something, instead of them carrying on the way they did, sleeping in the kitchen.
That’s where he was, the