Falling: The Complete Angels Among Us Series. Linn Halton B.
kick his foot away, pretending to be insulted. Was I hoping for more?
“Okay, your turn. What’s your little secret?”
Alex puts his empty coffee cup on the floor and sits forward, stretching.
“You think I’m not interested in women,” he turns his head sideways to look at me before he continues. “I’m not. I’m only interested in one woman, and for some really obscure reason it’s not meant to be.”
He looks sad, no—more than that—beaten. It had never occurred to me that he was nursing a broken heart.
“I’m so sorry Alex. I never thought for one moment… and the dating agency?”
“It’s lonely at times,” he says, and it’s almost a whisper. “Rather sad for a guy in his early thirties. However, I’ve realised that I’m not prepared to settle. Maybe some men are born to be single. I enjoy my own company, so I can’t exactly complain.”
I move around to sit up next to him. If you put a few books in between us we’d be a great set of bookends. Still, like statues, each consumed by our own thoughts. Sharing a sense of sadness for the things that life has given us to deal with.
“I think I need another drink,” I say, heading off to grab what’s left of the wine and two fresh glasses. It’s going to be a long night.
***
I squint as the light filters in through the window. Closing one eye to avoid the brightness, I wonder why I forgot to close the curtains last night. My arm flops over the side of the bed and I stretch, my head beginning to clear a little. Oh, I’m never going to drink too much ever again. I haven’t said that since I was a teen and had a drunken session with a couple of girlfriends. Hearing a groan, I roll over and my stomach does a queasy flip. Alex is next to me, thankfully facing the other way. I wriggle slightly and realise I’m naked.
I guess it was a night best forgotten, but a part of me would love to recall all of the details. It might just have been the best night of my life so far…
Mason doesn’t take my rejection well. When I break the news to him, I realise there was definitely a little more to it than simply turning down a promotion and accompanying him to a few events. Fortunately I have a week’s leave planned leading up to the wedding. I only have to get through today, however that also makes it rather awkward with regard to Alex and last night. By the time he stirred this morning, I was long gone I should imagine. I’d jumped into my jogging bottoms and t-shirt virtually the moment I opened my eyes and headed out for my usual run. When I arrived back home, the bed was stripped and the linen had been placed in the washing basket. He’d tidied up the kitchen and left a note.
A great evening, lovely company. Appreciated, Alex
I know that we have to address the elephant in the room before I leave work this afternoon. I couldn’t bear spending the next week wondering if it meant anything. At lunchtime I suggest we go out to grab a takeaway sandwich, figuring it’s easier to talk when we don’t have to look each other in the face.
“I know this is awkward, but we can’t ignore last night as if it never happened.”
“Agreed, but I’ve been struggling as I’m not sure what to say. It wasn’t exactly what I was expecting. There’s one thing I do need to ask you,” he turns to me, but I keep my eyes firmly fixed on the pavement ahead.
“Was it comfort sex? Please don’t say it was pity sex.”
Guess he’s answered the awkward question whirling around in my head then, although I’m beginning to get a few flashbacks of some rather passionate clinches. It’s all a bit vague still, but one thing I know for sure—it wouldn’t have been either of those. I’m really attracted to Alex and even without total recollection, the bits I can remember were hot. We both let our barriers down and it’s a long time since a man has held me like that. My heart performs a totally unexpected backflip and my cheeks begin to burn.
***
As often happens, the nervousness and sense of expectancy hovering around me while I dress for the wedding feels weighted by something else. It’s a nagging worry that is growing by the minute, to the extent that I slink away unobserved and head up to the second floor of the hotel. The guys’ rooms are two-one-five through to two-two-nine, but I have no idea which one is Seb’s. I hang around until I see a face walking towards me that I recognise.
“Hi Ceri, are you looking for Seb?”
“Yes, I wasn’t sure which room was his,” I’m trying my best to remain calm and Tom doesn’t seem to notice anything strange. He points to two-one-seven and I tap gently on the door, then more urgently when there’s no reply.
“Seb, it’s me,” I whisper and he opens the door.
“Ceri, great timing. Can you sort this bow tie for me?” My brother looks amazing. A kilt suits him and I can’t stop myself throwing my arms around him. Tears start leaking out of my eyes all over the place and he lifts me away from him to look at me.
“Hey, I’m getting married not getting the death sentence.” He frowns when I don’t laugh.
“Seb, I have a bad feeling. It’s strong,” I almost whimper.
Seb rolls his eyes and groans. “Not now, Ceri, not today. Please, for my sake and Anna’s. I’ll listen to whatever you have to say tomorrow at the family lunch, but for today let’s keep it light.”
I’ve upset him and the fact that he’s offering to listen to me at all, shows how much I’m unsettling him. There’s more than concern for simply upsetting Anna though, I can see a fleeting moment of hesitation. Does he feel just the tiniest little vibe too?
I’m left wondering, when Tom suddenly appears and the others begin to filter into the room. I hurriedly wipe my eyes, giving them all a watery smile.
“Best go touch up my make-up!” I say lightly. I know they all think I’m emotional because it’s Seb’s big day.
When I arrive back at the girls’ main dressing room it’s chaotic. No one seems to take any notice as I sit down and begin scrubbing off my make-up with a moisturising pad to begin all over again. It isn’t until Anna’s mum comes into the room looking rather fraught that I realise Anna went to the bathroom at the same time I went to find Seb. Looking around I can’t see her and a chill hits my stomach. Several of the girls are still having their hair done and there’s a sense of mild panic because the clock is ticking. That’s not what I’m picking up. The feeling I have is overwhelming, as if it’s the pre-cursor to a disaster. I overhear Anna’s mum asking if someone can go down to reception.
“What’s wrong?” I ask Anna’s best friend, Eva.
“Wedding nerves, it will be fine. Anna’s feeling sick and a bit faint. I’m sure all she needs is a valium to calm her down.” Eva sounds confident, but something constricts my heart like a band has just been placed around it. I scan the room, looking for a spirit—anything out of the norm. But all I can see are bobbing heads, curling tongs being pulled high into the air while two hairdressers work quickly to add finishing touches. Then everything is in slow motion. I raise my hand in front of my face and even that seems to take forever to move the few inches from my lap. I’m on my feet and running back up to the second floor before I have time to think about what I’m doing. I hear myself screaming Seb’s name and when his door opens he runs towards me.
***
“No, no, no…” the tissues in my hand are soggy and the person sitting next to me grabs another handful, thrusting