Forsaking All Others. SUSANNE MCCARTHY
affectation…
“Not dancing?”
She glanced up in surprise to find Leo Ratcliffe at her side. “Oh…No, not just for the moment,” she managed a little awkwardly.
“I found this in the drawing-room—I believe it’s yours.”
He held out a small, heart-shaped gold locket, and Maddy gasped in shock, her hand flying automatically to her bare throat. “Oh, my goodness—yes, it is! Thank you.” She took it from him, agitation making her hands shake. She might have lost it, and it was the only thing she had…“The clasp isn’t broken—I must have not fastened it properly. It was a good job it slipped off here—I might have lost it on the train…”
And never seen it again. The bleakness of that thought brought tears to her eyes, but she quickly blinked them back under cover of refastening the chain around her neck—being extra careful this time that it was fastened properly.
“It’s a pretty little thing,” he remarked, lifting it on his finger to study the fine flower pattern wrought into the gold.
“Yes…”
Suddenly she became aware of how close she was to him. There was a faint, musky, male kind of scent about him—not an aftershave, she was sure, but the unique scent of his own skin. It seemed to have a strange effect on her senses, and when she looked up she found herself gazing into his eyes. Deep-set brown eyes—not quite the same colour as Jeremy’s, she realised now, but a shade darker, and intriguingly flecked with gold…
“Leo! You said you’d only be ten minutes, and you’ve been gone half an hour!” Saskia’s petulant voice shattered the fleeting spell as she dragged Jeremy up the steps of the terrace. “Come and dance with me.”
He shook his head, smiling down at her indulgently. “In this crush? No, thank you. Come and get something to eat instead.”
For a moment Saskia looked rebellious, but then she smiled sweetly, tucking her hands into his arms and stretching up on tiptoe to put a kiss on his cheek. “All right,” she conceded, her sapphire-blue eyes aglow with adoration. “If that’s what you want.”
Maddy watched them walk away. Was that how it always was with them? They did whatever he wanted? She had quite been beginning to like him—almost, even, to envy Saskia a little bit. It had even crossed her mind to wonder why a man of such apparent intelligence would choose to marry a featherbrain like Sass—fond as she was of her, she could describe her in no other way. But apparently he was one of those men who wanted a sweet, biddable little wife, who would hang on his every word and think he was absolutely wonderful. She was aware of feeling just a little disappointed in him.
But Jeremy was demanding her attention, dragging her out on to the dance-floor. She did enjoy dancing, and she couldn’t help but enjoy Jeremy’s company. And as the evening drew on, and the music slowed, she found that she enjoyed being in his arms, and being kissed by him. And, if her mind occasionally wandered to thoughts of Leo, she could remind herself that Jeremy was every bit as attractive, and certainly more fun. And he wasn’t engaged to her best friend.
“WHAT…was it you wanted to discuss, Leo?” Maddy enquired, relieved to find that her voice was now completely under control again.
With a wave of his hand he indicated the piles of bills and documents on the desk and on the floor around it, stuffed into shoe-boxes and old brown envelopes—Jeremy had never had much patience with paperwork. “This. I’ve been trying to go through Jeremy’s papers and see if there’s anything that needs my immediate attention, but it’s the biggest mess I’ve ever seen.”
The note of censure in his voice stung her into sharp annoyance. “I’m sure there’s nothing that can’t wait another few days,” she retorted. “Why are you going through it anyway? Shouldn’t that be left to the executors of the estate?”
“I am one of the executors,” he responded evenly. “You’re the other. We’ve also been named as joint trustees. Everything’s been left to Jamie, naturally—although you’re to have a lifetime annuity—and there are a few small gifts to the staff.”
“Oh…” A lump had risen to her throat, and her eyes filled up with tears; it was so sad to think of Jeremy drawing up his will, cheerfully expecting that it would be many years before it would be needed. And it was typical of his generosity to have remembered the staff—but why on earth had he had to make Leo her co-trustee?
The housekeeper’s arrival with the coffee gave her a few moments to regain her composure. She should have guessed, of course, that Jeremy would have wanted Leo to administer his estate; he had always looked up to his older cousin—maybe even been slightly in awe of him. And he hadn’t been aware that Maddy would have preferred not to have too much to do with him.
Leo brought over a small table, set it down beside her chair and put her coffee-cup on it before seating himself on the opposite side of the fireplace. “How has Jamie taken it?” he enquired.
“Oh…He seems OK. Well, you saw him. He’s old enough to understand, but not old enough to really take it in properly. He knows it means he won’t be seeing his daddy again, but I suppose it’ll be a while before the realisation sinks in.”
“Yes.” Leo’s voice had thickened. “It will be for me, too.”
“For all of us,” she mused sadly.
Leo’s cold laughter startled her. “Oh, come on,” he protested, on a note of cynical mockery. “Don’t start playing the broken-hearted widow. All it’s done for you is save you the bother of getting a divorce.”
“I beg your pardon?” Her eyes flashed with frosty indignation. “For your information, I was still very fond of Jeremy. And if I’d wanted a divorce, I could have had one years ago.”
“Not without Jeremy’s consent,” he countered. “You walked out on him, remember? As the guilty party, you could only sit it out for the full five years.”
She stared at him, struggling to regain sufficient control over her voice to answer him. “Don’t you think I may perhaps have had good reason?” she queried with fine understatement.
Those agate eyes were hard and unforgiving. “You knew what he was like when you married him,” he asserted disparagingly. “It didn’t seem to matter to you then. You just wanted the sort of lifestyle you thought he could give you—the chance to mix with the county set, go to all the country house parties. But marriage vows are for better or worse, you know—not to turn your back on just because things don’t turn out to be quite the bed of roses you were expecting.”
Maddy felt her cheeks go from white to deep scarlet. He didn’t know—Jeremy had never told him about Saskia. Of course not, she reflected wryly; even though that hopelessly misconceived engagement had ended inside of three months, Jeremy would have been reluctant to let his cousin know that he was having an affair with his ex-fiancée.
And she could hardly tell him now, she realised in the next instant; he probably wouldn’t believe her, and it would just seem to him that she was trying to off-load the blame on to Jeremy when he could no longer defend himself. Besides, what did it matter to her what he thought of her? Once, maybe—but that was a long time ago. Now she only had to think about what was best for Jamie. She had to work with Leo over the administration of the estate—it would be best if personal feelings didn’t come into it at all.
“What happened between Jeremy and I is none of your business,” she informed him, her voice stiff with dignity. “But neither of us particularly wanted a divorce—it wasn’t as if either of us was in any hurry to marry again. And besides, it was better for Jamie to leave things as they were. It was a perfectly amicable arrangement.”
He lifted one dark eyebrow in frank scepticism,