Rhoda Fleming. Complete. George Meredith
only she would then be moving to her new lodgings. “But, oh! my dear, my blessed Rhoda!” the letter concluded, “do keep fast in your heart that I do love you so, and pray that we may meet soon, as I pray it every night and all day long. Beg father to stop till we meet. Things will soon be arranged. They must. Oh! oh, my Rhoda, love! how handsome you have grown. It is very well to be fair for a time, but the brunettes have the happiest lot. They last, and when we blonde ones cry or grow thin, oh! what objects we become!”
There were some final affectionate words, but no further explanations.
The wrinkles again settled on the farmer’s mild, uncomplaining forehead.
Rhoda said: “Let us wait, father.”
When alone, she locked the letter against her heart, as to suck the secret meaning out of it. Thinking over it was useless; except for this one thought: how did her sister know she had grown very handsome? Perhaps the housemaid had prattled.
CHAPTER XI
Dahlia, the perplexity to her sister’s heart, lay stretched at full length upon the sofa of a pleasantly furnished London drawing-room, sobbing to herself, with her handkerchief across her eyes. She had cried passion out, and sobbed now for comfort.
She lay in her rich silken dress like the wreck of a joyful creature, while the large red Winter sun rounded to evening, and threw deep-coloured beams against the wall above her head. They touched the nut-brown hair to vivid threads of fire: but she lay faceless. Utter languor and the dread of looking at her eyelids in the glass kept her prostrate.
So, the darkness closed her about; the sickly gas-lamps of the street showing her as a shrouded body.
A girl came in to spread the cloth for dinner, and went through her duties with the stolidity of the London lodging-house maidservant, poking a clogged fire to perdition, and repressing a songful spirit.
Dahlia knew well what was being done; she would have given much to have saved her nostrils from the smell of dinner; it was a great immediate evil to her sickened senses; but she had no energy to call out, nor will of any kind. The odours floated to her, and passively she combated them.
At first she was nearly vanquished; the meat smelt so acrid, the potatoes so sour; each afflicting vegetable asserted itself peculiarly; and the bread, the salt even, on the wings of her morbid fancy, came steaming about her, subtle, penetrating, thick, and hateful, like the pressure of a cloud out of which disease is shot.
Such it seemed to her, till she could have shrieked; but only a few fresh tears started down her cheeks, and she lay enduring it.
Dead silence and stillness hung over the dinner-service, when the outer door below was opened, and a light foot sprang up the stairs.
There entered a young gentleman in evening dress, with a loose black wrapper drooping from his shoulders.
He looked on the table, and then glancing at the sofa, said:
“Oh, there she is!” and went to the window and whistled.
After a minute of great patience, he turned his face back to the room again, and commenced tapping his foot on the carpet.
“Well?” he said, finding these indications of exemplary self-command unheeded. His voice was equally powerless to provoke a sign of animation. He now displaced his hat, and said, “Dahlia!”
She did not move.
“I am here to very little purpose, then,” he remarked.
A guttering fall of her bosom was perceptible.
“For heaven’s sake, take away that handkerchief, my good child! Why have you let your dinner get cold? Here,” he lifted a cover; “here’s roast-beef. You like it—why don’t you eat it? That’s only a small piece of the general inconsistency, I know. And why haven’t they put champagne on the table for you? You lose your spirits without it. If you took it when these moody fits came on—but there’s no advising a woman to do anything for her own good. Dahlia, will you do me the favour to speak two or three words with me before I go? I would have dined here, but I have a man to meet me at the Club. Of what mortal service is it shamming the insensible? You’ve produced the required effect, I am as uncomfortable as I need be. Absolutely!
“Well,” seeing that words were of no avail, he summed up expostulation and reproach in this sigh of resigned philosophy: “I am going. Let me see—I have my Temple keys?—yes! I am afraid that even when you are inclined to be gracious and look at me, I shall not, be visible to you for some days. I start for Lord Elling’s to-morrow morning at five. I meet my father there by appointment. I’m afraid we shall have to stay over Christmas. Good-bye.” He paused. “Good-bye, my dear.”
Two or three steps nearer the door, he said, “By the way, do you want anything? Money?—do you happen to want any money? I will send a blank cheque tomorrow. I have sufficient for both of us. I shall tell the landlady to order your Christmas dinner. How about wine? There is champagne, I know, and bottled ale. Sherry? I’ll drop a letter to my wine-merchant; I think the sherry’s running dry.”
Her sense of hearing was now afflicted in as gross a manner as had been her sense of smell. She could not have spoken, though her vitality had pressed for speech. It would have astonished him to hear that his solicitude concerning provender for her during his absence was not esteemed a kindness; for surely it is a kindly thing to think of it; and for whom but for one for whom he cared would he be counting the bottles to be left at her disposal, insomuch that the paucity of the bottles of sherry in the establishment distressed his mental faculties?
“Well, good-bye,” he said, finally. The door closed.
Had Dahlia’s misery been in any degree simulated, her eyes now, as well as her ears, would have taken positive assurance of his departure. But with the removal of her handkerchief, the loathsome sight of the dinner-table would have saluted her, and it had already caused her suffering enough. She chose to remain as she was, saying to herself, “I am dead;” and softly revelling in that corpse-like sentiment. She scarcely knew that the door had opened again.
“Dahlia!”
She heard her name pronounced, and more entreatingly, and closer to her.
“Dahlia, my poor girl!” Her hand was pressed. It gave her no shudders.
“I am dead,” she mentally repeated, for the touch did not run up to her heart and stir it.
“Dahlia, do be reasonable! I can’t leave you like this. We shall be separated for some time. And what a miserable fire you’ve got here! You have agreed with me that we are acting for the best. It’s very hard on me I try what I can to make you comf—happy; and really, to see you leaving your dinner to get cold! Your hands are like ice. The meat won’t be eatable. You know I’m not my own master. Come, Dahly, my darling!”
He gently put his hand to her chin, and then drew away the handkerchief.
Dahlia moaned at the exposure of her tear-stained face, she turned it languidly to the wall.
“Are you ill, my dear?” he asked.
Men are so considerately practical! He begged urgently to be allowed to send for a doctor.
But women, when they choose to be unhappy, will not accept of practical consolations! She moaned a refusal to see the doctor.
Then what can I do for her? he naturally thought, and he naturally uttered it.
“Say good-bye to me,” he whispered. “And my pretty one will write to me. I shall reply so punctually! I don’t like to leave her at Christmas; and she will give me a line of Italian, and a little French—mind her accents, though!—and she needn’t attempt any of the nasty German—kshrra-kouzzra-kratz!—which her pretty lips can’t do, and won’t do; but only French and Italian. Why, she learnt to speak Italian! ‘La dolcezza ancor dentro me suona.’ Don’t you remember, and made such fun of it at first? ‘Amo zoo;’ ‘no amo me?’ my sweet!”
This was a specimen of the baby-lover talk, which is charming in its season, and maybe pleasantly cajoling to a loving woman at all times, save when she is