The Freelance Mum: A flexible career guide for better work-life balance. Annie Ridout
to cook, and coffee. It’s tax deductible so I pay £600 a year for my membership.’
Having somewhere to work outside of the home also removes you from a domestic setting, which can be distracting (laundry to be hung out, packages being delivered, etc.). ‘As a freelancer, you need to be more selfish than you feel comfortable with,’ says Lucy. ‘If I’m in the house, I feel all the domestic duties coming at me. But if I leave the house, they can’t intrude on my mental space.’ Of course, working outside of the home means you have less control over your surroundings – including noise. ‘Always carry headphones and white noise to block out irritating sounds,’ she advises. ‘It’s incredibly frustrating when you plan to work on the train for four hours and end up next to someone playing music loudly on their mobile. But white noise will drown them out. Or you can just ask them to be quiet.’
Dealing with isolation
While I’m generally OK with my own company, there were definitely times – particularly in the dead of winter – when my daughter was at nursery, and before my son was born, when the house felt incredibly quiet, and I longed for some human contact. Sometimes, I’d go to the shop just so that I could have a chat with someone. Or phone my sister. When my son was at home with the childminder, I had to vacate, so I’d work in public spaces, meaning I was surrounded by activity. I still go now, if I feel lonely. Although I don’t intend to meet up with anyone – I’m there to work – I’ve actually made friends at my local coffee shop with people who are also freelance, and there to work. So we’ll have a quick chat, or give each other some advice, then get our heads back down. Working in this way – surrounded by other people who are also tapping into their laptops – makes me forget how isolated I sometimes felt when I worked from home.
Sali Hughes – author, columnist for The Pool, Guardian and Empire, and event host – says that the social aspect of office work can be felt as a real loss when you go freelance. ‘Lots of women really struggle when they go freelance with the fact that they’re not in a team any more. They don’t have those water-cooler moments. You have to embrace social media, but know when to stop. Be able to manage the loss of the social aspect.’ She used to enjoy managing people in the workplace, as well as coming in and talking about what was on the telly. ‘But now I’ve got Twitter and Facebook for that,’ she says. ‘After my first baby, it was the isolation that made me go mad. I didn’t know anyone with a baby, so I was really lonely. But after my second baby, there was Facebook – then Twitter. So I had people to talk to. As a journalist, if you’re a freelancer, it’s very solitary. Twitter and Facebook are the office. They’re your colleagues; people you speak to in place of physical co-workers. But then you’re reliant on yourself to stop messing about and get on with work. I strongly advise freelancers to block the internet between certain hours, using software. And if you need bustle, go to a coffee shop.’
Pragya Agarwal – designer, entrepreneur, journalist, TEDx speaker and mum of three, including two-year-old twins – agrees that becoming part of an online community, and using social media for real social interaction, can help to combat the isolation. ‘Working from home can be lonely,’ she says, ‘and I have written extensively for Forbes about how to manage loneliness as a freelancer. There are times when I do not speak to any adult for days, and so it is really crucial for me to have a strong community online. But I also try to go to some networking events when possible.’ (If the idea of ‘networking’ makes you feel panicked, there are lots of tips for making it more bearable – and even fun – in Chapter 9.)
Say yes
At other stages in this book, I’ll talk about the importance of learning to say ‘no’, but when you’re starting up, the big word is YES. Yes, I’d like to tell you about my new freelance business. Yes, I’d like to have a coffee with your sister who’s an editor of a women’s magazine and might be interested in doing a feature on me. Yes, I’d like you to take some flyers and leave them at your work. Yes, I’d like you to wear one of my tote bags to the networking lunch you’re attending. Say yes, and watch where it leads … And if you think it might be a good opportunity, but you’re not sure how, respond as quickly as possible and say: I love the sound of this and it would be great to talk more about it. It’s a way of saying ‘yes’ without saying: let’s do it right this second. Sometimes, you’ll need time to think about what you want, or can (with childcare limitations) commit to. You can ensure that you don’t let opportunities slip away, without making an immediate commitment.
Sali Hughes was working freelance before giving birth to her two sons, so she was already one step ahead in that she was being commissioned for work as soon as she was back at her desk, post-birth. However, she still felt a certain pressure to always say ‘yes’, in order to keep her position as the go-to for all things beauty. ‘The thing about being freelance,’ she says, ‘is that if you’re a successful freelancer, you’ll be fine for work. But there’s a degree of accepting work because you need to be the person who does it. So I’ve always taken on too much; to cement a position. I’m prone to taking on more than other people – than men, than people on desk jobs. But I’ve never missed a swimming gala or school concert, so you take the rough with the smooth. I work much harder than someone at a desk job but they don’t get the benefit of that flexibility.’ So say yes to the opportunities, but decide where your line will be drawn in terms of family commitments.
Meeting potential clients
The above steps – announcing your business on social media, telling your friends and family about it, saying ‘yes’ to as much as possible – all take you towards securing your first clients. You are the best person to sell yourself: you know the ins and outs of your trade, and you are the face of your brand. From now on, you’ll be telling as many people as you can about your business, so you’ll need to refine your elevator pitch. This is a way of explaining who you are, what you do and what you can do for them – all in the time it takes to get from the ground floor to the fifth floor, when they will be (metaphorically) getting out.
As I mentioned earlier, my work has various branches. Let’s take one: I’m editor of The Early Hour. My elevator pitch, to a potential advertiser on my website – let’s say an organic kids’ food company – would be this:
I’m Annie Ridout, founder and editor of digital parenting and lifestyle magazine The Early Hour. I put out articles at 5 a.m., for parents who are up early. I’ve grown a loyal following of parents who love thoughtful, ethical products. Like yours.
She might then say: Oh really. I’d love to hear more about what you’d charge for advertising but I’m rushing to a meeting. Can I take your email address? THIS IS THE IMPORTANT BIT: say, how about I take yours? This way, you won’t risk her forgetting about you and never making contact. Once she’s out of the elevator, or has hopped off the train – wherever it is that you are – compose an email: was great meeting you, Laura. Would love to talk more about how we could work together. Let me know when’s good to chat.
Also, if you know people working in your industry, offer to take them for coffee, or lunch, as you’d love to hear more about what they do and how they do it. Then tell them about what you’re doing. Always ask lots of questions, people will be flattered if you’ve done your research and know about them and their work. Showing an interest will make them warm to you. Shouting about you and your own work won’t. And remember to be open-minded – when you meet clients in their office, be friendly to everyone you meet: there could be someone else within the company looking for your services at a later date.