The Bible of Bibles; Or, Twenty-Seven "Divine" Revelations. Kersey Graves
stopped" (Gen. viii. 2). How fully is the heathen tradition disclosed here!
15. We are told that God gathered "the waters under heaven together unto one place" (Gen. i. 9). How ignorant he must have been of geography! He evidently had not studied the science, or had not traveled much, or he would have known the waters under heaven never have been "gathered together unto one place," but exist in many places, as the two hundred large lakes prove.
16. The Bible tells us, that, when God created the vegetable kingdom, he ordered each species of vegetation to "bring forth after its kind" (Gen. i. 11). Can we suppose that apple-trees would have borne buckeyes, or mullein-stalks produced pumpkins, or any thing foreign to their nature, if the command had not been given for each to bring forth after its kind?
17. According to the Bible, the vegetable kingdom was created before the animal; but the learned geologist Hitchcock, although a Christian by profession, in his "Elements of Geology" says, "An examination of the rocks shows us that animals were created as early as vegetables" (and he might have said much earlier). And yet the Bible says vegetables were created on the third day, and animals on the fifth (see Gen. i.).
18. The Bible represents vegetables as coming into existence before the sun, but philosophy teaches that they could neither germinate nor grow without the warming and vivifying influence of the sun.
19. The Bible tells us that "God made two great lights, the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night; and God set them in the firmament to give light to the earth" (Gen. i. 16, 17). That is, he made two round balls, and then stuck them into a hole scooped out of the firmament for the purpose. This seems to be the idea. Here is disclosed the most egregious ignorance of astronomy. Think of that stupendous solar luminary, as much larger than this pygmy planet as a man is larger than a mouse, being hung up or stuck up above us for our sole accommodation! How sublimely ridiculous!
20. The Bible represents the great world-builder, the almighty-, architect, as spending five days in plodding and toiling at this little mole-hill of ours before he got it finished up to his notion, and then made such a bad job of it that he repented for having undertaken it.
21. But when he came to make the countless worlds, the vast suns, and systems of suns, which roll their massive forms in every direction around the earth, these were all made in a few hours. "And he made the stars also." This text tells the whole story of the origin of the boundless planetary system, comprising millions of worlds larger than our planet. What superlative ignorance of astronomy Moses' God manifests!
22. Moses is awarded great credit by Bible believers for opposing polytheism, and teaching the existence of but one God: but it would have been more to his credit if he had stuck to a belief in a plurality of Gods; for it would take a million of such Gods as his imagination has created a thousand years to make such a universe as astronomers have brought to light since he wrote.
23. The language, "Let us make man in our own image" (Gen. 1. 26), seems to imply that there was an association of gods,—a company of almighty mechanics, who had formed a copartnership to do up a big job.
24. If man was made in the image of God, why was he cursed for eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge in order to be like God?
25. According to the Bible, God became so tired in the business of world-making that he had to take a rest of a whole day (and perhaps took a nap also) when the job was completed; but geology and philosophy both teach that creation never was begun, and never will be finished, but is going on all the time. Hence new species of animals and vegetables are constantly coming into existence.
26. The Bible represents the entire universe as being created less than six thousand years ago; but science teaches us that it has been in existence for millions of years.
27. A large volume of scientific facts has been accumulated by scientists, showing that even our earth, one of the youngest of the planets, is at least several hundred thousand years old. Look at a few of the facts which go to prove it. The coral reefs of Florida are estimated by Professor Agassiz to be one hundred and thirty-five thousand years old. Charles Lyell estimates the delta of the Mississippi Valley to be at least one hundred thousand years old. Four growths of cypress-trees far below the surface of the ground, and situated one above another, have been discovered near New Orleans, whose successive growths must have occupied a period of at least one hundred and fifty thousand years. So much for the agreement of geology and Bible chronology.
28. But we are told that a day in the Bible means a thousand years. Then, as the sabbath day constitutes one of the days spoken of in the Bible, and was provided as a day of rest, Christians and Bible believers should rest a thousand years at a time; and, as God rested a whole day (a thousand years), he must have been as tired of resting as he was of world-making. Why do the figures "4004 B.C." stand at the top of the first page of the Bible, if a thousand years mean one day?
29. The Bible teaches that whales, fishes, and birds were made on the same day; but geology assures us that fishes came into existence long before fowls.
30. The Bible teaches that beasts and creeping, things were all made on the fifth day of creation; but geology tells us that reptiles and creeping things crawled upon the earth millions of years before beasts came into existence.
31. The Bible represents man as coming into existence about six thousand years ago; but human bones have recently been discovered in the vicinity of New Orleans which Dr. Dowler estimates to be at least fifty thousand years old.
32. A deity who becomes so tired and physically exhausted with six days' labor as to be compelled to stop and rest, physiology teaches would be liable to physical disease; and, if physically diseased, it might terminate in death, and thus leave the world without a God (Godless).
33. The Bible tells us "the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground" (Gen. ii. 7); but philosophy teaches that dust possesses no vital properties, and that it would have been less difficult to make man of a stone or a stump, owing to their possessing more adhesive properties. One writer suggests that the negro must have been made of coal-dust.
34. According to the Bible, a serious blunder was made by Jehovah in the work of creation, by exhausting all the materials in the process of world-making and man-making, so that nothing was left to make a "helpmeet" for Adam; and this blunder caused the necessity of robbing Adam of one of his ribs.
35. But common sense teaches us that a small crooked bone but a few ounces in weight could not furnish half the material necessary to constitute a woman. The Parsees, with a little more show of sense, tell us that the rib was used merely as a back-bone, around which the woman was constructed; which revives in memory Erin's mode of making cannon, which consisted in "taking a round hole, and pouring melted metal around it." The Tonga-Islanders have a tradition about as sensible as that of Moses with respect to the origin of the first woman. Their God made the first man with three legs, and amputated one of them to make a "helpmeet for him?" This is an improvement, as a leg can be better spared when there are three than a rib: it also possesses more material than a rib.
36. The Bible teaches that man was created upright, but fell. If it means physically, it can be easily accounted for, and must be ascribed to his creator; for depriving him of one of his ribs would leave him in an unbalanced condition, so that he would be liable to fall.
37. The Bible imparts to us the strange intelligence that "the Lord God brought all the beasts and birds to Adam to see what he would call them" (Gen. ii. 19). What an idea for Omniscience or Infinite Wisdom to engage in the business of chasing bears, lions, tigers, elephants, and hyenas, and all manner of beasts great and small, and all manner of birds, also hissing, crawling, biting reptiles, and every living thing which he had created, and taking them to Adam "to see what he would call them"! Not having sufficient intelligence to find names for them himself (pardon the thought), his curiosity was no doubt aroused to see what an ignorant being of his own creation, who had not sufficient intelligence to clothe himself, would call the innumerable host of beasts, birds, &c., before any language was known, or even a single letter was invented to spell names with. (We are very far from desiring to wound the feelings or encroach upon the reverence that any man or woman may cherish for "a God of infinite