My Secret Life, Volumes I. to III. - The Original Classic Edition. Anonymous Anonymous
excepting the right place, my sperm spurted out: and only the last drop remained just as I buried my prick in her. Then instead of meeting her humid tongue with mine, I sank on her breast kissing, yet damning and cursing like a dragoon, at my spoiled pleasure,--I had spent out of
sheer copiousness of spunk, and excitement.
Said she, "It is as well as it is, get off." I made no reply, hoping my
sexual force would return, for my prick was in her sheath. She moved to release herself. Stronger far than me, she could in any other attitude
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have easily done so; but the most difficult position for a woman to disengage herself from a man, is when he is on the top of her, well between her thighs, and clasping her backside tightly. As she moved there was no strong will in it; how could it be otherwise? She in the prime of life had been without it for weeks, nature was pleading for me, my prick was in her, my spunk all about her. To gain time I promised to
get off in a minute. "Kiss me." Our mouths and tongues met. It was like magic. A voluptuous throb passed through both of us, my prick stiffened to the full, a sympathetic grind of her cunt responded; again we were in the full tide of pleasure, fucking and spending together, the future was forgotten as we sunk quietly down. I had spent twice without uncunting; scarcely was it over than she pushed me off, and washed out her cunt in my footbath.
We sat on the side of the bed kissing and feeling each other, it was like the old time, the door wide open to hear the street door knocks.
When the housemaid knocked, into bed I got; an hour afterwards home came my mother and into my bedroom. She approved of the hot footbath, but insisted on my taking a febrifuge. To keep up the sham, I took it, Mary brought it and stood by, whilst my mother gave it to me; my prick was
again standing like a prop at the sight of Mary, and as my mother pulled the bedclothes over me, she might, if she had had eyes, seen my prick pushing them almost up.
Next morning she gave notice to leave. I never had her again. On one or two occasions I felt her, and if there had been more time might perhaps have had her. At the end of a fortnight she told me that her monthlies were all right. From that day she resolutely refused to even let me feel her. "I don't much care about going back," said she; "I don't think I
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shall be happy, but I do it for the best; at all events I shall have a
home." The day before she went she said, "Goodbye, God bless you, you are a good fellow," but you will play mischief with many a poor girl
here before you have done. "I like you very much, and shall always think of you." I never heard of her after, and with her, passed from me the woman who is still in my recollection as one of the most beautiful, and perfect in form; as one who gave me the greatest sexual pleasure,--but I was of course very young and inexperienced.
My mother remarked that she was the most trustworthy servant she ever had; but that there was a mystery about her. Her boxes were labelled
for a place that the coach would not take her to, and her boxes were not
like a servant's. "I think she has been crossed in love and ran away," said mother. Said I, "Perhaps she had gone off with a bobby," it was a current joke then, policemen not having been long invented. My mother said in her severe way, "She is a virtuous woman, a youth like you
should not utter ignorant jokes about women, especially about the humbler classes, to whom good reputation is everything." I began to see plainer than ever, that I could humbug mother after that.
Many of our conversations are told here in her very words, others as nearly as I can recollect them. I have often wondered at the way this woman behaved to me, talked to me, and all about her. The circumstances as they occurred, even at the time seemed peculiar; I felt as if I was
wicked in getting into her, almost as if I was going to poke my mother; but I cannot attempt to analyze motives or sensations, I simply narrate facts. Certain it is, that I never have had a woman who in behaviour
resembled Mary, in manner, conversation, and general behaviour,--I
always felt as if she were a superior person to me, as if she were
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obliging me and not herself, and was putting me under an obligation, by letting me fuck her.
Again lonely, I not only wanted cunt, but also the society of a
woman, it was so sweet to see and talk, to some one I fucked; to do so secretly, was an additional charm, and I used to feel quite sad. I was then about in my eighteenth year.
CHAPTER VII.
At the Manor house.--Fred's amours.--Sarah and Mary.--What drink and money does.--My second virgin.--My first whore.-- Double fucking.--Gamahucking.--Minette.--A belly up and down.
One aunt as said lived in H...shire, a widow; her son, my cousin Fred, was preparing for the Army. I wanted a change, and went by advice to stay there. Fred was a year older than me, wild and baudy to the day
of his death, he talked from boyhood incessantly about women. I had not seen him for some time, and he told me of his amours, asking me about mine. I let him know all, without disclosing names; he told me in nearly the words, that it was "a lie," for he had heard my mother say, that
I was the steadiest young fellow possible, and she could trust me anywhere. This, coupled with my quiet look, and the care I took not to divulge names, made him disbelieve me; but I disclosed so many facts
about women's nature, that he was somewhat astonished. He told me what
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he had done, about having had the clap, and what to do if I got it; then he had seduced a cottager's daughter on the estate; but his description of the taking, did not accord with my limited experience. One day he pointed the girl out to me at the cottage door, and said he now had her whenever he wanted.
She was a great coarse wench, whom he had seen in my aunt's fields. He had caught her piddling on one side of a hedge; she saw him looking at the operation from a ditch, and abused him roundly for it; it ended
in an acquaintance, and his taking her virginity one evening on a hay-cock,--that was his account of it.
Her father was a labourer on my aunt's estate, the girl lived with him and a younger sister, her name was Sarah; he expatiated on her charm from backside to bubbies, but it was soon evident to me, that with this
woman it was no money, no cunt; for he borrowed money of me to give her. I had squeezed money out of my aunt, my guardian and mother, and had about ten pounds,--a very large sum for me then, so I lent him a few
shillings.
He had his shove as he called it, and triumphantly gave me again such account of his operations, and the charms of the lady, that I who
had been some time without poking, wondered if the girl would let me; arguing to myself, he gives her money--my girls never wanted money,--why should his? He had been dinning into my ears, that all women would let men for money, or presents, or else from lust. "Kiss and grope, and if
they don't cry out, show them your prick and go at them." These maxims
much impressed me.
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"Fred," said my aunt at breakfast, "ride over to Brown about his rent, you will be sure to find him at the corn market," and she gave him other commissions at the market town. I promised to ride with him, but had been tortured with randiness about this great wench of his; so made some excuse, and as soon as he was well off, sauntered towards the cottage, which was about half a mile from the Hall.
It was one of a pair in a lane. Scarcely anyone passed them excepting people on my aunt's lands. One was empty. The girl was sweeping in front of the cottage, the door was wide open. I gave her a nod, she dropped a respectful curtsey. Looking round and seeing no one, I said, "May I come in and rest, for it is hot and I am tired?" "Yes sir," said she, and in
I went, she giving me a chair; then she finished her sweeping. Meanwhile