Contrapuntal. Christopher Kondrich

Contrapuntal - Christopher Kondrich


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We didn’t know exactly what we were looking for, we didn’t know how the abnormality would present itself, in what sector, in what form, on what day—

       At one time,

       One man admitted that T made him feel.

       I remember cleaning out my desk, rearranging my things

       Time has oxidized to a dull green. Those given a placebo have

       Book Four

       Lying awake

       You can’t resolve any issue

       We need the mind to know

       Because the body is an

       He was in the process

       Having recalled

       I was making headway

       Tim was taking T

       I didn’t know that

       Though you must linger

       I’m not there yet, nor

       What was disappointing

       You have to choose

       If I chose the Bösendorfer,

       Perhaps we were led

       In Beethoven’s time,

       I couldn’t dawdle.

       We have a greater capacity

       Acknowledgments

       About the Author

       Free Verse Editions

      Sometimes a ghost entered my heart and I could feel, and some-times phrases entered my mind and I could speak, with reason. But never was I able to stay a man long enough to remain him.

      — Jeff Clark, “Napoleonette”

      Whatever we do on the piano is a collection of illusions.

      — András Schiff

      So I take my hand,

      and even though I know my hand,

      I know I know it,

      it feels like your hand.

      I take it but I’m tired.

      I know I’m tired because I squeeze

      what I see between my eyelids.

      Then I dream that your mind is mine.

      I dream that I secure it

      with my end of the rope.

      I wake while saying

      that what I say is the truth,

      that you should believe me

      because I say it.

      Book One

      If there’s one thing

      I remember apart

      from all other things,

      that I remember it

      is astounding to me

      though maybe not

      to Tim who I recounted

      this to before I left,

      I recounted that you

      arrived home one day

      fatigued as much as

      I’ve seen anyone fatigued,

      you could barely connect

      to your life and in a way

      you felt as though

      it were repeating.

      You were aware

      that it repeated, but

      you had no control,

      all the little things

      you did that day

      were out of character,

      you had been exposed

      to T, the lab bustled

      with dishes and you

      wore the protective gear,

      but you said perhaps

      it wasn’t enough,

      there could be no

      other explanation

      for your fatigue,

      there had been no out-of-

      the-ordinary activity

      besides working

      with the dishes of T,

      which were introduced

      that day by members

      of a parent company.

      When they presented you

      and your colleagues

      with Petri dishes,

      you felt a little uneasy,

      but mainly because it

      was something new,

      not because the dishes

      caused some red flag

      to pop up, you always

      tell me of your uneasiness

      when something new

      enters your life and

      you haven’t


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