Etiquette Guide to China. Boye Lafayette De Mente
Lawyers Out
Pay Attention to Small Details
Beware of Using Humor
Dress the Part
Chapter 10 What to Expect While Negotiating
The Business Card Imperative
Addressing the Senior Person
Sit Up Straight & Stand Tall!
Keep a Damper on Your Enthusiasm
Make a Series of Short Presentations
Keep Notes at Meetings
Confirm Mutual Understanding & Summarize the Meeting
Ask the Right Questions
Striking Like a Snake
Withholding Information
The “Hit-Run” Tactic
The Passive Face Ploy
Silence as a Negotiating Tactic
What to Do When They Leave the Room?
The Intimidation & Anger Tactics
Using Competitors as Bogeymen
Compromising the Right Way
Authority Levels Matter
Using Go-betweens
Keep on Negotiating!
Chapter 11 Business Entertainment
Business & Official Banquets
Reciprocal Banquet Hosting
Alcohol & Business
Answering Personal Questions
Gift Giving Is Dangerous
Chapter 12 When You Are Host in Your Own Country
Getting Personal
Structuring the Meeting Room
Providing Refreshments
Preliminary Remarks
Giving Your Guests Face
Inviting Guests Out for the Evening
Paying Bills
Seeing Your Guests Off
Appendix
Selected Vocabulary & Useful Expressions
Personal Titles
Family Relationships
Corporate Titles
Government Titles
Everyday Expressions
Useful Sentences
Saying hello and good-bye
Getting to know each other
In conversation
At the restaurant
At the office
At the hotel
On the road
Technology and communications
Money
Helpful Vocabulary
Glossary of Terms Related to Digital Communications
Index
Preface
Most Westerners think of culture (when they think of it at all) in terms of the arts, literature, and music, but these elements are only a small part of culture. Culture is also the way people think, talk, and behave, as well as the way they work and what they create. The various mental constructs that people have of their own existence, of life in all of its forms, and of the universe at large are products of their cultures. People are programmed by their cultures to view and react to the world in certain ways, and it is this programming that unifies them into individual civilizations.
The traditional culture of China is one of the most enduring and powerful ever to have been developed, and because it is the force that motivates and guides such a large number of people it is one of the world’s most important cultures.
Wenhua (wen-wha), the Chinese term for culture, can be translated as “patterns of thought and behavior.” The Chinese have traditionally viewed China more as a cultural entity than as a landmass, and in the past some writers have suggested that the country should be called Zhong Hua (Johng Whah), or “Middle Cultural Essence,” instead of Zhong Guo (Johng Gwoh), or “Middle Kingdom.”
China’s culture is so powerful that Chinese whose families have lived abroad for several generations are often still culturally identifiable as “Chinese.”
Throughout most of China’s long history, the relationships between people in all classes were based on carefully prescribed forms of behavior that addressed virtually every aspect of conduct. This was true to such a degree that learning and following proper etiquette was one of the major facets of life. And the higher one was on the social ladder, the more meticulous and demanding were the rules of etiquette.
The Chinese word for etiquette, li (lee), originally meant “rite” or “ritual”, referring to the fact that following officially sanctioned etiquette required detailed knowledge of hundreds of correct forms of behavior.
Training in this highly prescribed way of living was so thorough, so pervasive, that people were judged first, last, and sometimes only by how closely they followed its rules of behavior. Etiquette was equated not only with learning in general, but also with culture, morality, and even nationality and nationalism.
The Chinese eventually came to believe that theirs was the only correct form of etiquette in the universe, and that all who did not follow the same meticulous rules of conduct were uncivilized barbarians. Of course, the rules of etiquette in China today are no longer enforced by harsh feudal sanctions as they once were, and have been considerably relaxed. But they remain very important.
Despite the attempts of Mao Zedung and his communist regime to destroy all vestiges of China’s traditional culture, and despite the inroads made by Western cultures since then, most of the core values and basic behavioral patterns that have existed in China for more than two thousand years are still very much in evidence throughout the country. Formalities in business and formal situations are still ingrained in the behavior of the Chinese.
While some of China’s common customs are quite different from Western mores, others are similar. But in spite of any similarities, they often differ in ways that can spell success or failure for uninitiated foreigners.
It is therefore extremely valuable for visitors to China to have a working knowledge of the basics of Chinese etiquette, and it is vital for businesspeople, diplomats, and others going to China for professional reasons to know the ins and outs of Chinese thinking and behavior.
Since the last edition of this book, there have been momentous changes within China. By GDP, China is now the second richest nation in the world. The larger Chinese cities now look and feel just like cities in more developed nations, though there are still large pockets of poverty within China, especially in rural areas.
However, most people have access to cell phones, computers, and the Internet. Even if their home lacks a landline, it seems that just about everyone in China has some access to the digital world, giving people a degree of connection with others and access to information and news