Hope’s Daughters. R. Wayne Willis
aims to sear a brand (more than a product) into consumers’ brains. Tiger Woods’s business partners are hoping his confession will help pull his weakened brand out of the fire.
I was discussing Albert Schweitzer with a class of college seniors and used a sentence often spoken of Schweitzer: “He made his life his argument.” With three earned doctorates, Schweitzer decided that instead of spending his life ensconced in a European university talking up Christian love and service, he would give his life to putting into practice love and service as a jungle doctor in Africa.
One student in my class had an epiphany that she put in writing and gave to me: “Schweitzer definitely has caused me to wonder whether or not I am making my life my argument. It’s also made me wonder what my argument really is.”
Each one of us—whether we are aware of it or not—is building a brand. Our life is an argument for something. A sobering question is, to quote one tenderhearted college senior, “what my argument really is.”
March 13
“Amazing Grace”
Probably no one ever called her that in her first one hundred years. Orphaned at twelve, taken in by family and friends until she was adopted, Grace Groner worked as a secretary for forty-three years. She bought her clothes at rummage sales, never owned a car, and lived alone in a one-bedroom cottage. These days thirteen hundred Lake Forest (Illinois) College students have scholarships, internships, and studies abroad because of her. They call her “Amazing Grace.”
When she died in January, 2000, at age one hundred, Grace Groner left $7 million to her alma mater, Lake Forest College. She never sold the three shares of Abbott Laboratories stock she bought in 1935 for $180. When she died, after many stock splits and dividends reinvested, her initial investment had grown into a $7 million fortune.64
I recently listened to a professor sound off about “this generation,” in particular how they make no provision for the future. He stereotyped them as addicts to “instant gratification and instant communication.” His caricature was of a student wolfing down a Big Mac (instant food paid for with plastic money), text-messaging with the other hand (im chewing bm now), while steering the car with his knees. He would not expect any of them, like a Grace Groner, to set aside anything for old age.
Most of us admire the plodding, intentional game plan of a John McPhee, Pulitzer Prize-winning writer, Princeton professor, and author of twenty five books. He says he hardly ever has cranked out more than one single-spaced page a day. “You know, you put an ounce in a bucket every day,” he explains, “before you know it you have a quart.”
Aesop’s ancient story about the turtle and the hare may be truer in our time than ever before. There is still something to be said for eschewing immediate pleasure for taking the long view; something to be said for the discipline and perseverance of the turtle, or John McPhee, or “Amazing Grace” Groner.
March 14
Three women who met each other almost half a century ago on the campus of George Peabody College in Nashville reunited, this time bringing their spouses with them to a Turkish restaurant. Together their three marriages represented 128 years of lasting love. Joining them was one couple’s daughter and the daughter’s fiancé.
At one point one of the old married men quipped: “It would be a shame to deny this young couple the benefit of all the wisdom assembled here. Let’s each of us put into one word the secret of our marriage.”
The first to volunteer said “forgiveness.” Holding grudges, nursing old wounds, is malignancy in a marriage. His wife offered her one word, “sensitivity.” Stay attuned to what your beloved is thinking and feeling and needing.
A second married woman said “compromise.” Her husband contributed “devotion.” Total commitment to protecting and nurturing the relationship trumps everything else.
The third married man said “mutual-respect.” He hyphenated the word to conform to the game’s one word rule. His wife agreed: “respect.” She said, “We admire each other’s talent, knowledge, creativity, and pursuit of excellence. We are equally yoked in our own little mutual admiration society.”
The young unmarried couple was invited to participate: “Surely you don’t want to just be voyeurs—what do you two value most in your relationship?” She said “support.” They encourage each other and give each other a soft place to fall when life gets messy. He volunteered “awareness.” Pick up on the vibrations, the heart-sounds, of your beloved.
The eight values overlap. Taken as a whole they may give a pretty clear profile of real love—not the feeling of love, or the idea of love, but the dogged practice, day in and day out, of the behaviors that make love last.
March 15
Some of my friends e-mail me stories, corny jokes, or political commentaries that are just not my cup of tea, but I cannot bring myself to tell them to stop so I just grimace and touch the delete button. For some reason I opened one today. I am glad I did. It made me smile and think.
It seems a volunteer greeter who worked in the registration area of a large hospital sometimes showed up ten to fifteen minutes late for his shift. However, when on duty, he greeted everyone with a friendly, bright-eyed, hospitable smile. Everyone agreed he was a tremendous asset. One day the director of volunteers invited Sparky to join her for a cup of coffee. After praising his work ethic and chipper spirit, the manager asked: “I’m just a little curious. About half the time you show up a little late. I know you retired from the military. What did they say to you there when you came in late?”
Sparky answered: “They said, ‘Good morning, Admiral. Can I get your coffee, sir?’”
Some of the people I admire most are the rich and famous who have a servant heart. I think of Bill Gates and Warren Buffet, some of the richest people in the world, who now are giving much energy and much of their fortunes to bless the world’s poorest and sickest. I think of Jimmy Carter who for over thirty years after finishing his presidential term has been volunteering for Habitat for Humanity, building houses for people who otherwise could never be homeowners.
Two quotations come to mind, the first from philosopher and Rabbi Abraham Heschel: “When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.”
The other comes from Indian poet and philosopher Rabindranath Tagore: “I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted, and behold, service was joy.”
March 16
A little over a century ago, the National American Woman Suffrage Association held its national convention at Louisville’s Seelbach Hotel. It would be another decade, though, before the Nineteenth Amendment granted all women the right to vote.
Did anyone then foresee that in less than a century more than half the students in many seminaries, medical schools, and law schools would be women? Who foresaw that three United States Supreme Court justices would be women? The “Rules for Teachers” one hundred years ago illustrate how far women have come:
1. You may not marry during the term of your contract.
2. You may not keep company with men.
3. You must be home between the hours of 8:00 p.m. and 6:00 a.m. unless at a school function.
4. You may not loiter downtown in any of the ice cream stores.
5. You may not travel beyond the city limits unless you have permission of the chairman of the school board.
6. You may not ride in carriages or automobiles with any man except your father or brother.
7. You may not smoke cigarettes.
8. You may not dress in bright colors.
9. You may under no circumstances dye your hair.
10. You must wear at least two petticoats.
11.