Dog Eat Dog. Niq Mhlongo
trying to calm me down. ‘But you are talking to ladies, remember?’
I turned to the security officer. ‘Just shut up! I’m not f-ffucken talking to you,’ I said, pointing my forefinger at him.
There wasn’t another word from him. I turned back to Ms Steenkamp.
‘Do you want to regret having seen me in this office today?’
I paused and looked at the two ladies as if I was waiting for an answer. They were bloody scared. I opened my eyes wide as if the two ladies had just insulted the president of the country. My aim was to frighten them into thinking that I was some big name. They must think I’m the son of their employer, although their employer is probably white, I convinced myself.
Everyone was watching me; I guess most of the people were trying to think where they might have seen me. Some of them must have thought for sure that I was the son of the Minister of Finance, or cousin of the President, or some important celebrity. But before I could vomit more insults, a white lady entered through the main door. She approached the counter, obviously surprised at the sight of the two security guards. Something in my enemies’ body language told me that somebody important had arrived.
‘My Gawd! What is going on here?’ she exclaimed. ‘I’m Dr Winterburn, the registrar in this office.’ She paused. ‘Is there some problem in this office I should know about?’
I felt that I had to answer her before anybody else took advantage of the situation. I summoned all my courage to dispel the anger that was already clouding my mind, and said as calmly as I could:
‘This lady here called me an ape when I came to see Registrar Winterburn, and I demand to lodge a formal complaint to her sup . . .’
Before I could finish my sentence the secretary with the narrow forehead interrupted me.
‘Ja. You think you’re clever mos. Say what you were saying before. Come on say it now. Tell her.’
‘Never shout and point at me like that,’ I warned her.
‘Let’s not be emotional and . . .’ said Dr Winterburn, looking at me.
‘Who’s emotional?’ I snapped.
‘I mean, it’s natural to be emotional and I understand how you feel,’ she said patronizingly.
Her attitude made my blood boil.
‘Listen here! Are you coming to take sides or have you taken them already?’
‘No no no. We don’t take sides in this office,’ she countered defensively. That’s where I wanted her, on the defensive. ‘I’m only trying to find out what happened because I’m the one in charge here. Please don’t misunderstand me.’
‘OK then. These two ladies insulted me by calling me an ape.’
The two secretaries hissed as I tried to explain, but Dr Winterburn shushed them.
‘Ms Steenkamp, is it true that you called this man an ape?’ she asked, trying hard to be fair.
Ms Steenkamp gave a little derisive laugh, her eyes blinking in disbelief. ‘No! Jeez! Good heavens!’ she exclaimed. ‘I did not call him an ape.’ She paused. ‘I was called by Rachel to come and talk to this guy who was forcing his way into the office instead of standing like the other students in the line and waiting for somebody to help him.’ She paused with her finger still pointing at the queue. ‘So I said to him he should stop his apish behavior. My God! I can’t believe this!’
Ms Steenkamp tried hard to make herself look more innocent.
‘You see! That’s what I don’t appreciate,’ I said, feigning horror. Like lightning, I flicked my eyes from Ms Steenkamp to Dr Winterburn. ‘And she is repeating it right in front of you, saying that my behaviour is apish. That is like saying that I was socialised with apes and I should be living in the mountains or the zoo. Is that what you see when you look at a black person like me?’
‘Bullshit! That is not true. I didn’t . . .’ said Rachel.
‘What did you say just now?’ I snapped again.
Silence fell while Dr Winterburn considered our statements. The look on her face told me that she was siding with me.
‘Rachel, what happened before you called Ms Steenkamp?’ enquired Dr Winterburn.
‘This gentleman came straight over to the counter and I had to tell him to go back to the end of the line. When he refused to do so I had to call Ms Steenkamp.’
Like a judge in a court of law, Dr Winterburn turned and faced me. ‘And why did you refuse to follow those procedural orders?’
‘Dr Winterburn, I know all about the procedures here.’I paused. ‘For me to make an appointment to see you in this office all I need to do is sign a form which is inside those files.’ I paused again and pointed at the files, which had been picked up off the floor by one of the security guards. ‘And not to stand in the queue with the other students.’
I paused and looked at Dr Winterburn. She was nodding in agreement. ‘I was coming to do just that when these two ladies here tried to embarrass me in front of all these students. This one even took the piss out of me by asking me what I was doing at university if I could not read the signs.’ I pointed at Rachel. ‘She said that without even greeting me properly, let alone asking me what I wanted like any civilised person would. That is not the way to treat people. They are here to help the students, not to insult us.’
‘He’s lying. Ask the officers. He’s the one who swore in this office!’ shouted Rachel.
None of the security officers came to her rescue. Maybe they were siding with their black brother. Rachel was breathing hard and her eyes were beginning to mist over with tears. Dr Winterburn turned and faced the two officers who were leaning on the counter, listening to everything that was being said.
‘Gentlemen, I think I can handle this little misunderstanding on my own.’
As soon as the two officers had left, Dr Winterburn invited Ms Steenkamp, Rachel, and myself into her office. She ushered us into the chairs and the three of us sat nervously in anticipation of her verdict, while secretly observing each other.
‘Sorry, I didn’t get your name,’ Dr Winterburn said, trying to address me in a conciliatory tone.
‘I’m Dingamanzi Makhedama Njomane,’ I answered.
My two enemies remained anxious and silent.
‘Mr Njomane, as you might have heard I am the one in charge here.’ She paused. ‘It’s against the policy of this institution as a whole to insult people, or rather to make people feel insulted. I take this opportunity to apologise to you on behalf of this office, and I hope my staff will do the same.’
The breath whooshed out of me in disbelief. I did not expect the matter to be concluded with such simplicity. Both my enemies looked at Dr Winterburn in disbelief and tried to mask their disappointment by remaining silent. But with a look that no one was likely to disobey, Dr Winterburn turned to the two ladies to elicit their apologies.
‘I’m sorry if you took my words to imply what you thought. It was not my intention to insult you,’ said Ms Steenkamp reluctantly.
‘I’m also sorry for the misunderstanding that happened between us. I hope you did not take it that bad. I did not mean what you imply,’ muttered Rachel quickly.
‘Okay. Thank you. You two can leave us now,’ ordered Dr Winterburn.
I watched my enemies leave the office with glee. But I knew that a mammoth battle was still ahead of me.
Without a word Dr Winterburn opened the top drawer in her desk and took out a diary. She hunched forward and removed her glasses, pushed her long bushy red hair backwards with her right hand, and then began to page through the diary with her long fingers. She groped in the same drawer again and took out a small brown bottle,