My First Exorcism. Harold Ristau

My First Exorcism - Harold Ristau


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is jealous that God did not assume the form of an angel. In C.S. Lewis’ science-fiction novel, Out of the Silent Planet, the aliens on other planets (who also worship the Triune God) are dumbfounded and bewildered in their first meeting with a human being. Here before them stood the unique creature whose form the boundless Creator of the universe had assumed! God became man! The Creator had incorporated human beings into His life and Being. The authority that belonged to Christ had been communicated to His people and, to some extent, so had His capabilities.

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      Lisa fell into one of her trances as we strolled out of her mother’s dilapidated bungalow and passed in front of the weathered garage door. It was mid-summer, early afternoon. After a few steps, she froze in a stupor, except for her arms that swayed at her sides like rubber bands. Standing still as a mannequin, her head fell forward, motionless. This time, in this trance, something was different. She was not herself. More accurately, she was not there at all—something else was. I stepped away from her and asked God for guidance through a very short prayer with my eyes wide open. I had nothing to lose. I felt a bit paranoid, especially if it all turned out to be an immature prank. I began to address—what I thought might be—a demon. A wave of terror swept over me and I broke into a cold sweat. It all seemed so surreal. Lisa started to tremble slightly, head still hanging low, her face hidden under a veil of thick dark hair masking her sinking frame. To my surprise, I heard a deep voice protrude from a mouth that normally produced a high-pitched tone. It stated simply, “she’s mine,” after which the host resumed her ordinary state. No foaming at the mouth or 360 degree head spins. Yet those two simple words spoken in the third person sent chills up my spine. What an accurate expression summarizing its possession: “she’s mine.” It turned out that it was right.

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      The nature of a demon is a subject worth pondering. The word “demon” comes from the Greek daimon, which can be translated as “instrument” or “tool.” Ironically, demons do not want to be what they are. Loathing their instrumentality, they reject their place in the cosmological hierarchy. Our Lord warns, “When you see the abomination of desolation standing where he ought not to be (let the reader understand), then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains” (Mark 13:14). Unlike their angelic brothers, they refuse to remain God’s messengers and helpers, taking residence in places to which they are not assigned. Along with punk rock star Iggy Pop, they “lust for life,” but not their own. They want ours. Like us human beings, they are dissatisfied with their position in life. They reject their identity as servants and wish to seize the place of the king. They abhor being “used” and lust to be “ends,” even though that unique position is already fulfilled by God Himself who is the single end of all things.

      The Lord is the sole source of peace, rest, love, and joy although the demons adamantly deny it (while we often resist it). Accordingly, every creature’s fulfilment is uniquely in Him. Even unbelievers know this to be true intuitively. The secular world too has its prophets. The novels of Henry James and Ernest Hemingway impart a message that all human choices lead to dissatisfaction. A disproportionate number of poets commit suicide. True peace and rest for the Christian are found solely in God because, at the end of the day, at the end of our life, at the end of the world, we have one single use. Just as a light bulb finds satisfaction solely in an electrical socket, having no other use, so too, worship is the manner in which human beings are plugged into God, their unique source of eternal contentment. But due to our sinful and corrupt nature we have allied ourselves with the devil, a false plug and empty hole: the begetter of death, robber of life, root of all evil and vice, instigator of envy, font of avarice, fomenter of discord, and author of all pain and sorrow. We are clueless to the fact that our simple dissatisfactions betray our true allegiance. Yet just like the demons, we do not want to be what we are. Notwithstanding our identity as children of light we are all too easily attracted to the shadows and the darkness. The rhetoric of human servanthood and instrumentality rings inherently offensive, suggesting images of oppression by eighteenth-century slave drivers mistreating their human property. Characteristic of the demonic is scorn of one’s true identity and spurn of one’s place and role in God’s order. Accordingly, demons are riotous monsters of chaos. In the Eastern Church sin is not described in terms of a deliberate wilful opposition to God. Instead, the sinful nature is framed within a discourse of man’s inability to know himself and God clearly: a confusion of identity. During one exorcism, a demon was quoted describing hell in the following way:

      For creatures that find their satisfaction, fulfilment and peace in something that lies outside of their own personhood, hell is the absolute expression of navel-gazing—useless.


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