Against the Titans. Peter Nguyen
Delp’s prison experience was a decisive stage in his spiritual formation. The notion of inner freedom in Delp’s farewell letter to von Tattenbach alluded to the Ignatian charism of realizing the disposition to choose and do God’s will. Indeed, in recognition of this time as a period of being gifted with God’s presence, Delp entered into the realm of grace in which the path and the will of God was step by step disclosed. This patient willingness to learn and receive from God corresponded to the Ignatian concept of indifference, according to which one is freed from inordinate attachments and passions to love God first and foremost.172
All creaturely indifference possesses a mysterious magis that points to God. In a letter dated January 11, 1945, and addressed to his mother, Delp said,
Stay brave and upright. It is the Lord God who decides our destiny. We want to give ourselves to him without being bitter. I understand that this is difficult for you, dear Mother, but it must be borne. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for every single thing that you have given to me and have been for me . . . . Stay strong, dear Mother. Pray for me. When I am with God, I will always pray and plead on your behalf and make up for all the love I have failed to give. We will see each other again. After a little while, we will be together again. Then it will be forever in God’s joy.173
In another letter, written on the same day and addressed to Marianne Hapig and Marianne Pünder, Delp wrote,
Now I am going down the other path. Whatever God wills, let it be done and surrendered into his freedom and goodness. That was no court of law, but an orgy of hatred. . . .
Due to the manner of the trial, my life has received a purpose for which one can live and die . . . . If I have to die, at least I know why. Who else today [among the many who are dying] knows that much? We are going to be killed as witnesses for these four truths,174 and if I am allowed to live, I know what my sole goal is in the future.175
In these two letters, Delp acknowledged that the ever-greater God expresses himself in the concrete lives of men and women who testify on his behalf. The role of Christian discipleship is embodied in a self-sacrifice that reveals the nature of God, and the disciple receives the strength to live this self-oblation seriously and consciously.
In the mid-afternoon of January 11, 1945, after a two-day trial, the German People’s Court in Berlin, Germany, convicted Alfred Delp to death for high treason against the Third Reich.176 According to the verdict, Delp was convicted, along with Helmuth James von Moltke, of being one of the foremost conspirators in the Kreisau Circle, an anti-National Socialist group. The court sentenced Delp and Moltke of weakening Germany’s defense through their clandestine meetings, discussions, and creation of plans to seize power in a post-National Socialist Germany.177 Their activities, the court claimed, fostered a defeatist mentality that aided the enemies of Germany. As a consequence, Delp and Moltke were judged to be accomplices of Germany’s enemies. In particular, Moltke was convicted of being the lead conspirator, and Delp was convicted of devising plans for a state that abolished private property through the implementation of Catholic social teaching.178
While Delp was awaiting execution,179 he wrote two more reflections on the Lord’s Prayer and the Holy Spirit.180 After composing these two prison meditations, Delp continued to engage in writing letters to friends, family, and Jesuit brethren. Delp’s letter written to Franz von Tattenbach on January 18, 1945, offered a glimpse of his inner peace despite suffering from anxiety:
I’m still alive . . . . An interior strength allows me more and more hope and confidence. As I sit here waiting for my execution, though, I certainly do not want to trivialize the situation and go into nervous breakdowns. The time for breakdowns is definitely past (in Plötzensee, they are only physiological and, therefore, do not count). I live in great peace and freedom . . . . Perhaps the last salutary humiliation involves accepting life as a grace. Maybe the entire thing (awaiting execution) concerns the meaning of waiting, and yet, the acceptable time will come. Only God knows. I cast my entire existence on Him.181
Despite the hostile conditions that confronted him, Delp continued to encounter a greater peace, and a vital aspect of that peace was his friendship with Moltke.
On January 23, 1945, Delp’s friend and companion, Helmuth James von Moltke, was hanged in Plötzensee Prison; prior to his execution, Moltke wrote letters to his Freya and his friend Delp. Writing to Freya, Moltke revealed the profound impact Delp had had on him by acknowledging humorously that he was dying “as a martyr for St. Ignatius of Loyola.”182 In his letter to Delp, Moltke beautifully expressed the gift of friendship that emerged between them while in prison:
Dear Friend,
In order to clarify a point, I want to say the following: the Lord has led us here marvelously. He also showed us in the last couple of months in human relationships the places that he could prepare and make favorable twists and turns. He showed with various signs that he is with us . . . . And he can make good for us at the gallows in Plötzensee, as in the freedom [we experienced] in Kreisau or elsewhere . . . One thing, however, is most certain, we must without ceasing dare to pray . . . . Who can know that to which all this is necessary in the plan of the Lord. For us only one thing is valid: to commit ourselves joyfully in his guidance, even if we must go into the dark and are not able to see the path before us.183
In these two notes, Moltke revealed the mutual bond between Delp and him that beckoned forth the good in each other. Moltke saw both Delp and him as God’s gift to each other, in which they were able to enjoy the presence of each other, and, under Divine Providence, were willing to witness the Gospel under harsh conditions. Their friendship, in this case, was a grace, enabling the two to participate in God’s redemptive work. Moltke’s “thank you” to Delp became a sort of eucharist, in which he communicated an appreciation to God for Delp’s presence.
Moltke’s death led Delp into an intensification of anguish. After the execution of Moltke, on the same day, Delp poured out his soul to Oestreicher:
Today is a tough day. Now all my friends and companions are dead. I am the only one left, the only one in chains. I do not know what is the reason behind it; however I do not expect anything good. Perhaps it is a necessary bridge to a stronghold? I am exhausted with sadness and terror. Humanly, it would be easier to be dragged [to the gallows with my friends] . . . . More than ever my life stands absolutely on God. For me, every exertion of reason is gone. I pray and trust and surrender and abandon myself to the Lord.184
In a letter to Marianne Hapig and Marianne Pünder, dated January 24, 1945, Delp wrote:
Good people, this was a tough week. I believe the hardest of all . . . Sometimes you would like to switch off [the anxiety] for an hour, but that is not just possible. In addition, Buchholz185 has corrupted my imagination. In the midst of the anguish over my friends’ death, he told me exactly what happens when one is hanged. I think it would have been sufficient for me to experience it on the spot. Well at least, I know it now . . . . Next week, the First Friday devotion to the Sacred Heart and a Marian feast are on the same day. Please pray.186
In these letters, Delp’s anxiety manifests itself as a terror (Schreck) which isolates and leaves him restless and in great perplexity. Despite his apparent extended intensification of his own “Gethsemane,” Delp did not abandon his faith in God. In fact, his trust in God increased in the midst of his anguish. Though his gift of himself to God did not lessen his fear, Delp’s suffering became part of his witness against the evil of his time; his suffering was a participation in Christ’s redemptive work. Even the terror of the Nazis can be met with faith, hope, and love.
In Delp’s last letter to his fellow Jesuits, he wrote:
Dear Brethren,
The actual reason for my condemnation was that I happened to be and chose to remain a Jesuit. There was nothing to show that I had any connection with the attempt on Hitler’s life, so I was acquitted on that count. The rest of the accusations were far less serious and more factual. There was one underlying theme—a Jesuit is a priori an enemy and betrayer of the Reich. So, the whole proceedings turned into a sort of comedy developing a theme.