The Dead Fathers Club. Matt Haig
woman on the phone said Hello? Hello? Is that Philip?
I knew the voice because it felt like a feather on my neck. It was my History Teacher Mrs Fell.
I said Yes.
It was the first time I had talked to Mrs Fell since the lesson on Family Trees.
She said Hello Philip. Its Mrs Fell. I was just wondering how you are doing?
I lied and I said Im all right.
It felt weird talking to a Teacher on the phone. Even Mrs Fell. It was more weird than talking to Dads Ghost.
She said Everyones thinking of you at school.
And I thought What are they thinking? but I didnt say it and then Mrs Fell said We cant wait to see you.
I didnt know what to say and the only word I had in my head was Yes so I used it.
She said Is your Mum there Philip?
I said Yes.
I wanted to say something about Romans but I didnt.
She said in a voice that sounded like it was on tip toes Would she be able to talk?
I said Yes Ill just get her.
Then I said Mum! Mum! Phone!
And Mum got out of bed and walked downstairs with sleepy hair and she said with her eyes Who is it?
I said School.
Mum got the phone and said in her sad voice Hello? Yes yes it is. Yes. No. It has but were getting there. No. It just doesnt seem. No. Yes. Oh yes I think he would. I think he wants to. I think it will do him good. Yes. Definitely. Thank you. Oh thats. Oh. Thank you. Bye.
Mum put the phone down and said out of a yawn She was just double checking that youre going on the Trip to Hadrians Wall. She thinks it will do you good. I told her you were still going.
I said But
But I couldnt think of anything.
When Mum was in the bathroom getting ready I sat and looked at the five Guppies and then I saw a reflection in the fish tank. It wasnt like a normal reflection it was like a reflection of a reflection and I turned round and it was Dads Ghost and I said Dad? in a loud voice.
He said Quiet.
He put his finger on his lips and then he finished telling me what he had to say.
He told me about a man in the Dead Fathers Club called Ray Goodwin.
Ray Goodwin is the ghost Dads Ghost saw first after he left the car and he is the one who told him about the Dead Fathers Club.
Ray Goodwin was a miner who lost his job and he was murdered 11 years ago the year before Dad bought the Pub and the year I was born.
I said How did he get murdered?
And Dads Ghost waited for a minute like he didnt know the answer and then he said I dont know. Ray talks about everything but not that.
I wondered why Dads Ghost was telling me about Ray Goodwin but then he said Ray Goodwin was the one who told him the truth about ghosts.
THE TRUTH ABOUT GHOSTS
1. The only people who end up ghosts are MURDERED.
2. Some ghosts like Dad dont know they are murdered until after they die but they always find out.
3. All ghosts get the Terrors.
4. The Terrors can only stop when ghosts stop being ghosts.
5. Ghosts can only stop being ghosts when they get Revenge.
6. Ghosts can only get their Revenge when the murderer is killed.
7. Not all the Living can see ghosts only some of the Living and they are mostly the children of the ghosts.
8. If the Living dont take Revenge in the No Time the ghosts stay ghosts for ever.
Uncle Alan is Dangerous
I didnt say anything because I didnt understand. I just stared right through Dads Ghost and watched the black Mollies and the five Guppies in the fish tank swimming together like a cloud.
He said All ghosts were murdered.
I heard Mum get out of the shower and she said Philip? Are you all right? Philip?
And Dads Ghost said Say yes Philip.
I said Yes in a loud voice.
Then Dads Ghost said I have to tell you Philip. I have to tell you because you are the only one who can see me.
I said in a whisper On the news no one was there.
He shook his head and said They werent.
Then he said The brakes on the car didnt work. I pressed down and it was just air.
And I said Oh.
And he said Someone did it. Someone broke the brakes on purpose Philip. Someone who knows a lot about cars.
The words went into my head two times. The first time they were just words and the second time was after Dads Ghost had said them and they went one sound at a time
some
one
who
knows
a
lot
a
bout
cars
The last word sounded louder like it had capital letters like CARS.
And then he said what I was thinking just at the same time as I was thinking it so at first I thought the voice was in my head and he said It was your Uncle Alan.
And I said No.
Then he said He wants this place. He wants your Mum. He was always jealous.
And I said No.
And Dads Ghost said I have seen him. I have seen him Philip. I have seen him saying sorry. Saying SORRY Philip. I have seen him drive over the bridge looking for signs. I know it was him Philip.
And then he looked at me and said it again.
I know it was him.
You have to trust me.
I know it was him.
And I said No no no.
He said Uncle Alan is dangerous. He will kill anyone who stands in his way Philip. That includes you Philip. And what happens when he gets bored of Mum? He will kill her too Philip.
The words were squashing on my chest and I had to think of my breathing to get the air inside me.
He said You have to stop him Philip.
I said Ill tell the police.
He said You cant tell the police Philip theres no evidence.
I said But youve seen him.
He said Ghosts dont count as evidence.
I said Ill tell Mum.
He looked really angry and said You cant tell Mum anything Philip. It will put you both in more danger.
I said Ill tell him to leave us alone.
He said No Philip no. He wont listen to you.
I said What shall I do?
He stood there and his face didnt move for ages like he was a see through photo and then he said in a voice that squeezed my chest even harder You must kill him Philip.
You must get my Revenge.
The Hole in the Wall
After