Spy Land Women Play Me. Perry Ritthaler
Her face lit up like a roman-candle and I escorted the beautiful woman to the dance floor. From nowhere she asked me how old I am. I smiled and tell her today is my birthday; I am twenty five. I pulled her close to me gently and she snuggled into my arms and chest even deeper.
My mind is racing with the details from our conversation at the bar. She is fresh out of university and here on business on behalf of her father’s textile corporation. They have a beautiful summer home on the water and she is twenty three and not twenty one. I look down into her beautiful blue eyes and I feel like I am falling under a mystical spell.
My sexual desire is overflowing from my body into the abyss hopeful; anticipating my next emotion flowering into a physical encounter. I lean deeper into her and our faces meet with a deep passionate kiss. I am rock hard and protruding into her leg. I almost feel embarrassed and afraid to break our embrace when the song ends. When we break the embrace and interrupt the trance she smiles and tells me; are you in the tent business.
I smile and tell her it is your entire fault. From nowhere she rubs her hand across my pants when we walk back toward the bar. I cannot help but notice her accent is Russian and I know I need to run a security check on this woman before I get more involved. When we return to the bar I order us fresh drinks and tell her I need to use the restroom. Before I walk away I take her business card off the bar and place it in my pocket.
When I arrive in the restroom I pull out my Blackberry and access the security network I upload the name Nakita Mistigri through the secure central intelligence server. They have a few details on the lady but nothing that stands in my way of me spending intimate time with the vixen. I am always worried about Russian spies coming into the USA and penetrating our intelligence network. The last thing I need is a screw up with the wrong woman to end my new promotion opportunities at the agency.
We have had four drinks and I need some food or my words will start to slur so I take Nakita by the hand and with a gentle kiss I whisper in her ear; I say please join me at my table for dinner.
Nakita smiles and snuggles into my arms and kisses me gently on my lips. I look over to Tommy and she has a smile on her face from ear to ear. Suddenly I pick up Nakita in my arms and walk over to table. We are getting very friendly and drunk. I tell Nakita it is time for food and time for more of her enchanting conversation. Nakita asks me if I am familiar with the Mensa program so I tell her yes; is that the IQ test or another organization. Nakita smiles and asks me; how high did you score on the Mensa tests?
I smile at Nakita; it is your sharp mind and ability to read intelligence that turns me on most about you. What do you think Nakita under two hundred or over two hundred? Nakita smiles and tells me a handsome man with charm like yours; then the water appears with menus and the waiter asks us if we would like an appetizer. We both need a glass of water and Nakita orders a shrimp cocktail and a cesar salad; I order a blackened grouper sandwich with salad.
I want to change the IQ question topic and remain a mystery to the woman so I ask her more questions focusing on how beautiful she appears. Before I know it the food arrives and we are eating like famished animals. I look into her beautiful eyes and I can see all of her food turning in her mouth. She smacks her food like a small pig eating at a trough and belches loud half way through her meal. We both laugh as the waiter asks if we need more napkins or water.
I am starting to wonder about my trickster sister because my stomach is starting to churn. I keep trying but I cannot hold back the loud fart sounds coming out of my body. My face is red and my forehead is sweating when I tell Nakita I need to use the bathroom. As I run past the bar I see my half-sister laughing at me. I just make it into the bathroom to see both toilet cubicles are full. I knock on the cubicle door and ask will you be long and I hear both men say we just sat down.
I am going to shit in my pants if I do not find a toilet. I look around the bathroom and there is a mop and pail sitting in the corner. Sweat is running off my face and my stomach is rolling with cramps. I have to fart so bad it is painfully buckling me over. I knock on the cubicle door again and the now the man sounds pissed at me and tells me to wait.
I frantically look around the room and decide to remove the mop from the pail; pull my pants down and sit on the pail. Suddenly my ass explodes into the pail and the smell almost knocks me to the ground. I am sitting in less pain in my stomach however with no toilet paper to clean up the mess on my ass.
Suddenly there is a knock on the bathroom door and I hear a woman say I need my mop and pail. I am coming into the bathroom. I feel so embarrassed when I see the door open. I want to stand and yet I just need to sit longer because my stomach wants to release another dump. The gas creates a farting sound echoed in the pail and the woman is holding her nose and tells me you are really a sick individual. Just then a midget comes out of the bathroom cubical and tells me you really are a pig.
The next thing I hear is the other guy in cubicle yell; hey buddy you believe in God don’t you; then he says why did God give a woman one more IQ point than a cow? My mind is racing and everyone in the bathroom is listening to this guy in the cubicle.
Then he yells because when you pull on a woman’s tits she does not shit or piss on the floor. I am so offended but not as offended as the woman that is looking at me shitting into the mop pail in the bathroom. She yells you people are all sick and walks out the door. I tell the midget I need some toilet paper and he laughs at me as he walks out the door. I hear the man in the cubicle flush the toilet and as I tell him I need some toilet paper; my adopted sister’s boss comes into the bathroom. She is laughing at me and uses her cell phone to snap a picture of me in my embarrassing position.
I am lost for words as I roll the pail into the abandon cubicle. I hear her laughing at me and she tells me make sure I clean the pail when I am done. The guy that tells me the joke also has a cell phone and snaps a picture of me as I try to get off the mop pail and sit on the toilet seat. I can hear him laughing as he leaves the bathroom. I am holding my head in my hands when I think the last thing I need are pictures like this in the internet or on You Tube.
Finally my stomach stops growling and I wipe the mess off my ass; I want to leave the stinky toilet cubicle and wash my hands before I return to my table.
When I walk past the bar my adopted sister is talking to her boss and they are both laughing at me. I cannot believe this just happened to me. Nikita smiles when I arrive back at the table. She tells me I thought you fell in and then she looked concerned and asks me if I am ok?
I am rattled and tell her I think my hard liquor shots I drank mixed adversely with the blackened grouper that had too much spices on it; and now I just need to drink more water.
Then my adopted sister has her cell phone in her hand as she walks over to the table and shows me a picture of me sitting on a mop pail in the bathroom on her cell phone. Nakita looks puzzled and asks if she can see the picture my sister is laughing at on her cell phone. I tell Nakita some things are not meant to be seen on a first date. Just then a waiter bumps into Tommy from behind and she drops her cell phone on the table; as the waiter drops the plate of food on the people sitting right beside us.
Nakita swings her arms back and moves her chair back to avoid being hit by food and hits the other waiter in the groin with her elbow. As the waiter bends over he sees the image on the cell phone. Nakita also looks down at the cell phone and both people say; he is shitting in a pail in the picture. I grab the cell phone and tell Nakita it is an old picture taken years ago. All I want to do is leave the restaurant. I grab Nikita by the hand and head for the cashier to pay my bill.
I tell Tommy I will call her tomorrow; I run my credit card, leave a tip and we are out the door heading into the parking lot. I am holding Nakita close by my side when I ask her if she is driving. Nakita tells me she wants to get to know me better and then kisses me on the lips slips me her tongue in a very passionate kiss. I feel the affection turn into a wild sexual desire rolling through my veins. Nakita tells me her car s at the summer house. I look at Nakita and smile as I say your black chariot awaits us. My BMW looks beautiful in the moonlight and I think my sports car impressed Nakita.
Nakita wants to direct me to the summer house so I let her. I know this town like the back of my hand so as soon