The Essential Guy de Maupassant Collection. Guy de Maupassant
But a white blackbird, Madame, for your niece is a pearl. Let me tell you, the happiness of these children will be the happiness of my declining years.
MME. DE RONCHARD
I wish that it may be, Monsieur, without daring to hope for it.
MARTINEL
Never mind. There are two things on which I am an expert--the merits of women and of wine.
MME. DE RONCHARD [_aside_]
Especially upon the latter.
MARTINEL
They are the only two things worth knowing in life.
SCENE II.
(_The same characters and_ Petitpr? _who enters_ C, _with_ L?on.)
PETITPR?
Now that this red-letter day has gone by as any other day goes, will you play a game of billiards with me, Monsieur Martinel?
MARTINEL
Most certainly, I am very fond of billiards.
L?ON [_comes down stage_]
You are like my father. It seems to me that when anyone begins to like billiards at all, they become infatuated with the game; and you two people are two of a kind.
MARTINEL
My son, when a man grows old, and has no family, he has to take refuge in such pleasures as these. If you take bait-fishing as your diversion in the morning and billiards for the afternoon and evening, you have two kinds of amusement that are both worthy and attractive.
L?ON
Oh, ho! Bait-fishing, indeed! That means to say, getting up early and sitting with your feet in the water through wind and rain in the hope of catching, perhaps each quarter of an hour, a fish about the size of a match. And you call that an attractive pastime?
MARTINEL
I do, without a doubt. But do you believe that there is a single lover in the world capable of doing as much for his mistress throughout ten, twelve, or fifteen years of life? If you asked my opinion, I think he would give it up at the end of a fortnight.
MME. DE RONCHARD
Of a truth; he would.
L?ON [_interrupts_]
Pardon me, I should give it up at the end of a week.
MARTINEL
You speak sensibly.
PETITPR?
Come along, my dear fellow.
MARTINEL
Shall we play fifty up?
PETITPR?
Fifty up will do.
MARTINEL [_turns to_ Mme. de Ronchard]
We shall see you again shortly, Madame.
MME. DE RONCHARD
Well, I have had enough of Havre for the present.
[_Exit_ Martinel _and_ Petitpr? C.]
SCENE III.
(Leon _and_ Mme. de Ronchard.)
L?ON
Martinel is a good fellow. Not a man of culture, but bright as sunshine and straight as a rule.
MME. DE RONCHARD [_seated_ L.]
He is lacking in distinction of manner.
L?ON [_inadvertently_]
How about yourself, Aunt?
MME. DE RONCHARD
What do you mean?
L?ON [_corrects himself and approaches_ Mme. de Ronchard]
I said, how about yourself? You know what I mean--you have such an intimate knowledge of the world that you are a better judge of human nature than anyone I know.
MME. DE RONCHARD
Indeed, I am. You were too small a boy to recollect it, but nevertheless, I went a great deal into society before my husband spent all my money, and let me tell you that I was a great success. For instance, at a grand ball given by the Turkish ambassador, at which I was dressed as Salammb?--
L?ON [_interrupts_]
What, you, the Carthaginian princess?
MME. DE RONCHARD
Certainly. Why not? Let me tell you that I was greatly admired, for my appearance was exquisite. My dear, that was in eighteen hundred and sixty--
L?ON [_sits near_ Mme. de Ronchard]
Oh, no dates! for goodness sake, no dates!
MME. DE RONCHARD
It is not necessary to be sarcastic.
L?ON
What! I, sarcastic? God forbid! It is simply this: in view of the fact that you did not wish this marriage to take place, and that I did, and that the marriage has taken place, I feel very happy. Do you understand me? It is a triumph for me, and I must confess that I feel very triumphant this evening. Tomorrow, however, vanish the triumpher, and there will remain only your affectionate little nephew. Come, smile, Auntie. At heart you are not as ill-natured as you pretend to be, and that is proved by the generosity of soul you have evinced in founding at Neuilly, despite your modest means, a hospital for--lost dogs!
MME. DE RONCHARD
What else could I do. When a woman is alone and has no children--and I was married such a short time--do you know what I am, after all? Simply an old maid, and like all old maids--
L?ON [_finishes the sentence for her_]
You love toy dogs.
MME. DE RONCHARD
As much as I hate men.
L?ON
You mean to say one man. Well, I could hardly blame you for hating him.
MME. DE RONCHARD
And you know for what kind of girl he abandoned and ruined me. You never saw her, did you?
L?ON
Pardon me, I did see her once in the Champs-Elys?es. I was walking with you and my father. A gentleman and lady came toward us; you became excited, quickened your steps, and clutched nervously at my father's arm, and I heard you say in a low voice, "Don't look at them; it is she!"
MME. DE RONCHARD
And what were you doing?
L?ON
I?--I was looking at him.
MME. DE RONCHARD [_rises_]
And you thought her horrible, didn't you?
L?ON
I really don't know. You know I was only eleven years old.
MME. DE RONCHARD [_crosses_ R.]
You are insufferable! Go away, or I shall strike you.
L?ON [_soothingly, and rising_]
There, there, Aunt, I won't do it again. I will be good, I promise you, if you will forgive me.
MME. DE RONCHARD [_rises, as if to go out_ C.]
I will not!
L?ON
Please