The Davey Dialogues - An Exploration of the Scientific Foundations of Human Culture. John C. Madden
– So glad you agreed to help me. When can we start?
– Just you wait a darned minute! There are a few things I need to know before we begin.
I was nettled that it had read my mind so easily. I sensed, but of course did not actually see, a condescending smile on the faceless voice.
– Fire away, but there is not much I can tell you about our universe just yet. Nor would it help you much if I could tell you. You humans don’t seem to understand your own universe all that well. Mine is very different.
– First of all, I still don’t believe you are from another universe. Just exactly what are you?
– Actually, your experts are simply mistaken. I do inhabit another universe. Believe me, this is not the only miscalculation your cosmologists have made.
– Whether or not what you say is true, I need to know more about you. How much do you already know about me? Can you read my mind? Do you know the history of humankind as well as my history?
– All good questions. Let me put your mind at rest. There is not much more to tell about me. Just as you cannot see me, I cannot see you. By a strange coincidence of nature, some aspects of our physics are the same as yours. This means that I can actually hear all the sounds made on your Earth, and, after careful study, I can attribute a source to each sound. I have made a study of all the noise emanating from human beings for what to you will seem like a long time, but for me is a very reasonable space of time. This has allowed me to decode and understand all languages currently spoken on Earth. Having heard your friends talk about you, and then tracked you down, I have been listening in on your conversations.
I could feel the blood rush to my face, as I tried to recall what I might have said that was embarrassing.
– Of course, as I have already told you, I am also holding conversations with others who share your interests.
– So, what would happen to your project if we all got together and gave you the same story?
I heard a hollow laugh.
– Not much chance of that. First of all, you have to find the others, none of whom so far has admitted to anyone that they are talking with me – and almost no one would believe them if they did. Secondly, you would all have to agree on what to tell me. Of course, I would be listening in on your conversation, and, in any case, I can assure you that there would be precious little agreement in the group of individualists I am talking to! You would be as intransigent as any of them.
I bristled at this.
– Nonsense! I don’t read a lot just so I can confirm what I now believe!
– True to a degree, but you are not really very tolerant of views you consider to be unscientific nonsense, are you?
Like most people, I rather flatter myself that I am very tolerant of the views of others, perhaps especially their religious views. I tried to think back on past conversations that might have led the disembodied voice to draw such a conclusion but gave up when the voice said it would like to get started, and could I please tell it how I planned to proceed.
I was ready for the request.
– Before we begin, Mr. Voice From Afar, what can you say or do to prove to me that you are real and not just a sign that I am going mad?
– Yet another doubting Thomas, as some of you would say! About half the people I talk to ask that question. The rest would probably like to ask but are afraid to. Well, the short answer is that there is likely not much I can do to convince you I am real. I have no power to influence events in your universe, except insofar as I might tell you something that would cause you to do something you might not otherwise have done. That being the case, I have to be pretty sure I understand what is going on before I give any advice!
But if you think about it a little, and especially if you decide to continue our discussion, you will likely come to the conclusion that your own mind would be incapable of inventing our discussion. If you think I may be the voice of another human sending messages to you by extra-sensory perception (as some of my other human contacts were inclined to do), you will then have to decide if any other human might reasonably come up with a story anything like what I am going to tell you, and, if you thought they might do so, you should then wonder why they would go to all that trouble.
– Okay, then you won’t mind if I ask you a few questions, like: “Who is your best friend? And what does he or she look like?” “Do you have a sun and moon where you live?” “Do you have literature and art and music?” “Do you fall in love?” “What do you eat? And where does your energy come from?” “Do your children go to sch . . .”
– Wait! Wait! Wait! I can answer most of these questions for you eventually, but not now. Any answer I give you now will be just as strange and incredible to you as what you know of me already.
Isn’t it enough for you to know that what you tell me may have an important influence in helping me to understand my universe? When we know each other better, you will learn quite a bit about me, I promise you.
This was the sort of reply I had expected to receive. In thinking about it after my first encounter with the voice, I had concluded that if I were in its position, visiting another unfamiliar universe, I, too, would not want to disclose very much at first, for fear that my universe could be harmed as a result. I had also concluded that there was not much to be lost from proceeding to the next stage. But the next stage, I had vowed to myself, would be a small step.
– All right, let’s proceed. You’ll have to give me a week or ten days to prepare, and then I will tell you all I know about creation myths. It will take me about an hour. Is that too long and drawn out for you?
There was silence. At length it spoke.
– This time it is you who must be kidding! Make me a break! Your proposal does not begin to provide enough information to explain your wars, your partisanship, your duplicity, your nobility, your avarice and cruelty, your thirst for knowledge or your literature. Yes, your literature, as well. Why do humans write and read books? Did Darwin provide an explanation for that?
Please don’t imagine that I am in a hurry. Time is a feature of your universe, and for you humans I know it can seem to pass quickly. I have no reason to be in a hurry. How often do you think I have heard you expound on Shakespeare and on your revered scientists and philosophers, on the properties of the brain and of DNA, on the nature of your universe and on exciting research on the real sources of human happiness. Are you going to try to tell me that these subjects are not relevant to an understanding of mankind? I think not!
Remember that I cannot read your books and journals; I can only listen in on conversations. Most of these don’t lead anywhere. As often as not, at least one of the speakers is enjoying herself or himself, while the others are too busy thinking about what to say next to listen to what the first speaker says. As a result I am taking in a jumble of information, most of it outdated and repetitive. I need a framework to fit it all into – but useful frameworks are not just hastily assembled beams leaning against each other at odd angles, they are carefully built segments of a larger structure whose overall form is determined by the assemblage of its parts so as to provide the backbone of a living functional structure.
– Hold on! I don’t need a lecture on a framework for understanding ourselves. What you propose is a major task. Even if I were to agree to proceed as you wish, what good would it do you? If you really are from another universe, it will almost certainly be useless – unless you have some evil designs on our universe. I have better ways of spending my time than talking to you. Please just go away and talk to some of the other thousands you claim to be conversing with.
An unworldly strangled sound filled the room, a sound straight from Hollywood. I had an almost uncontrollable urge to laugh at the incongruity of it all. But somehow the mid-ranges of the sound conveyed feelings of anguish and pathos, so I sat motionless waiting for the sound to cease.
– I suppose I should not be surprised