The Thubway Tham MEGAPACK ®. Johnston McCulley
thlipped between my ribth today. It ith a lucky day, I tell you. I can feel it! Dog-gone! You want it to cloud up and rain all the time!”
“Uh-huh!” the landlord grunted. “I only hope that you’ll be able to turn in tonight at the usual time and in the usual place, Tham. I hope you won’t be compelled to sleep in a cell on a hard bunk, old boy.”
“Well, my goodnethth!”
“If I was you, Tham, I wouldn’t for worlds try to lift a leather today. I’d take a walk, or go to the park, or somethin’ like that. I’d stay out of the subway and run every time I saw a dick or a cop!”
“You thertainly make me thick!” Thubway Tham told him. “You are a thimp!”
Tham snorted angrily, and descended the stairs to the street. Nosey Moore had attempted to throw cold water upon his enthusiasm, but it was at the point of blazing up again. It would take more than a soured and disgruntled landlord to change Tham’s mind.
So at the first corner Tham’s enthusiasm burst into sudden flame again. Happening to glance down at the curb, Tham saw something glittering in the bright sunshine. He stooped and picked it up. It was a cheap tie pin of the near-gold variety in the shape of a horseshoe and studded with imitation diamonds. It was worth about thirty-five cents over any bargain counter, but to Thubway Tham it was a symbol which represented good luck.
“A horthethhoe!” Tham gasped out, grinning again. “A good-luck horthethhoe! And that thilly Nothey Moore tried to make me think that thith ith not my lucky day!”
He fastened the horseshoe beneath the lapel of his coat and hurried on toward the little restaurant where he usually breakfasted. His enthusiasm was flaming again. Nosey Moore could take his croaking and travel hence with it! Thubway Tham knew a lucky day when he met one!
Tham ate his usual breakfast, the check for which should have been exactly fifty cents. The check he received was for forty cents only, another indication of good luck, and his belief in the day of good fortune was confirmed. Leaving the restaurant, Tham continued along the crowded streets toward Madison Square, his favorite resting place, and there he sat down on a bench and wondered whether Detective Craddock, his friend and enemy, would put in an appearance, as he did usually at this hour.
And Thubway Tham did not have long to wait. The big headquarters man came slowly along the walk, and, looking over the crowd, he saw Thubway Tham, grinned, and sat down beside him. Detective Craddock seemed to be in a rare good humor.
“Tho I thee your ugly fathe again, do I?” Tham said growlingly.
“Even so, Tham, old-timer,” the detective replied. “We always manage to be around when we are wanted.”
“And thometimeth when you are not wanted,” Tham told him. “You are a petht.”
“Tham, your tone surprises me! And we are about to part for a few days, too.”
“How ith that?” Tham wanted to know.
“Well, the police out in St. Louis have put violent hands upon a gent wanted badly in little old New York,” the detective explained. “In other words, he is being detained. And I have been selected by my chief to journey to the Missouri metropolis and bring this gent back to face the consequences of his many crimes. I leave this evening, and am to be gone five or six days.
“Thith ith my lucky day!” Tham gasped out.
“Do you intend for me to gather, Tham, my boy, that you are glad I am not to be in the neighborhood for a few days?”
“You can gather at leatht that much,” Tham told him promptly. “I hope you like Thaint Louith tho much that you dethide never to come back!”
“Tham, you surprise me again! You know very well, old-timer, that life for you without my frequent presence would be nothing but a sad burden.”
“Yeth?” Tham asked. “I could manage to thtruggle along, I guethth. I would forthe mythelf to endure your abthenthe, Craddock. It would be hard lineth and would pain me greatly, but I would try to bear up under it.”
“It seems to me that your smile is brighter than usual this morning, Tham.”
“Uh-huh! Poththibly tho! You thee, I’ve got a hunch that thith ith a lucky day.”
“In that case, possibly I’d better trail right along with you and protect the purses of the populace, or something like that.”
“Thuit yourthelf, Craddock,” Thubway Tham replied. “All the dickth in the world and Brooklyn couldn’t worry me any when I am havin’ a lucky day!”
“Got a hunch, have you?”
“I’ll thay I have? And it ith workin’ out, too. I found a horthethhoe thith mornin’—and now you thay that you are goin’ away for a time. And thothe are indicationth that my good luck ith buthy and goin’ thtrong.”
“Well, well! But bolts have been known to come from a blue sky, Tham!”
“You can’t worry me any,” Thubway Tham declared. “It ith one lucky day! I hope that you have a nithe trip, Craddock. I hope they keep you out there a month!”
“Huh! You seem to forget, old boy, that there are other detectives in the department. Possibly somebody will have his eyes on you though I be gone.”
“Poththibly! And poththibly I don’t care a whoop if they do,” Tham replied. “If you have any little errandth to run before catchin’ your train, don’t let me delay you, Craddock!”
“Why, Tham! You are positively insulting this morning,” Craddock told him, grinning.
“Maybe tho!”
“I hope that nobody catches you with the goods while I am gone, Tham. I hope to have that honor myself.”
“Uh-huh! You have been tryin’ to do that for thome little time,” Tham reminded him. “I’ll be in thome old man’th home before you get me, Craddock!”
“Well, Tham, I must go on down the street. I’ll see you when I get back.”
“Not if I thee you firtht,” Thubway Tham told him.
II.
Leaving Madison Square a few minutes later, firm in the belief that this was a lucky day, Thubway Tham made his way to Broadway and continued along it toward Times Square.
Passing through a crowd on a busy corner, he felt a touch on his arm. Tham turned slowly, to find “Nifty” Noel beside him.
Nifty Noel was known as the dude of the underworld. He had a passion for fine raiment. He would go without a meal to buy the latest in cravats. He frequented hotels where he was not known to the house detectives and swindled men and women.
And he was not always in funds. When he was not he often borrowed from his friends. Few could refuse him, for he had magnetism and a personality of a sort. But Nifty Noel seldom repaid these small loans, evidently forgetting all about them.
“Want to see you a second, Tham,” Nifty Noel said.
So Thubway Tham stepped aside with him, thinking that Nifty Noel was about to negotiate a small loan, and wondering whether he would have the strength to refuse. Noel led him out of the crowd and into the side street.
“Tham,” he said, “I owe you twenty dollars.”
“I guethth that ith correct, Nifty.”
“And I’m flush and want to pay you,” Noel continued. He drew a bundle of currency from his coat pocket, peeled off a twenty-dollar bill, and gave it to Tham. “Many thanks,” he said.
“Thankth yourthelf,” Tham replied. The affair had quite staggered him. Nifty Noel repaying borrowed money was something new, a thing scarcely to be understood.
Noel waved a hand and continued down the street, and Thubway Tham slipped the bill into