What every boy should know. Jan van Elfen
Let’s talk about them.
Bursting at the seams
Since birth, you’ve grown up so quickly. At one stage your parents couldn’t keep up with buying you new clothes. Your shoes were always too small.
Then your body slowed down, probably somewhere between your tenth and twelfth birthdays. At the same time, compared with your early school days, you became more relaxed in nature and in your behaviour. This was when your body took a break and recovered some of the energy it had used for all that growing.
You don’t have to worry that your friends will outgrow you during this slower stage. This break lasts only a short time – about a year or two. It’s actually the lull before the storm of adolescent growth. Then you’ll grow so quickly that your legs will seem too long and your feet too big. You’ll also tend to feel clumsy.
During this phase of growth you’ll probably catch up to and outgrow the girls of your age. But growing taller is only one part of puberty.
You’re spurting hair everywhere
Quite suddenly, you notice your body growing larger and your muscles getting bigger. You’ll see signs of a fuzzy moustache on your upper lip. On other areas of your body that used to be smooth, fine hairs will start to appear – especially in your armpits and on the pubis (the bulge just above the penis). Some boys also start to grow hair on their chest. At first this hair is light and fluffy, but later it becomes darker and curlier.
Your voice breaks
Not all these changes are equally welcome. Some will embarrass you. For instance, when your voice breaks: one moment it’s deep and then suddenly, without warning, it changes to a high-pitched squeak. It is so unpredictable!
Don’t get mad if your family teases you a little about your voice. They know what’s happening and they don’t mean to be nasty. There is nothing to be ashamed of – it’s just a sign that you’re developing normally.
Your sexual organs
The most obvious change in your body is in your external sex organs. Male hair growth starts at about the time the testes and scrotum start to get bigger. At the same time, or soon after, the penis grows longer and thicker.
The internal sex organs also start to mature. The prostate gets bigger and sperm production starts – so much so that ejaculation (release of sperm) may occur at night. A “wet dream” normally happens without warning and could be another cause of embarrassment. Remember that this experience is an important milestone in puberty – and another sign that you’re becoming a man.
At this stage you may be confused by the different anatomical names we’ve used here. Perhaps you’re used to different names for your organs, such as “willy” and “balls” for “penis” and “testes”. Get used to these new terms, but don’t be ashamed of the names used by you and your family.
When you read the following chapter – about the anatomy and physiology of the sex organs – you’ll realise just how interesting and efficient your body is.
When does it all start?
It’s not possible to predict exactly when the changes of puberty will start. With most boys it starts at the age of 12, reaching a peak between the ages of 13 and 14. However, it’s not unusual for some to start ahead of their friends at 11 or even 10 years old. But some guys start to mature only in matric, or even after they’ve left school. There’s no point in worrying about when you’ll start “growing up”. Some babies get teeth and start crawling before others. But in the end, they all chew and walk equally well.
Even a slow starter eventually reaches maturity. Everyone develops at their own pace. For example, a boy may have a well-developed penis, but may not as yet have experienced an ejaculation of semen, while another, less-developed boy may ejaculate in his sleep or as a result of friction.
Because they are at such a self-conscious stage of life, adolescents worry a lot about their physical appearance, such as crooked teeth, protruding ears or slow growth. And since boys will be boys, attention will also be focused on the appearance of the penis.
Your breasts also grow
Another unwanted sign of puberty for a boy is the enlargement of his breasts. Don’t be scared that you’re turning into a woman if your nipples start itching and the areolas (surrounding brown areas) show some swelling. Compared with a girl, you’ll always be flat chested.
The slight enlargement of your breasts could, however, be uncomfortable and for a while even a slight bump or the chafing of a rough shirt against your nipples could be painful. You may also find that both breasts don’t harden or get bigger at the same rate.
This phenomenon proves yet again that physically everybody has something of the opposite sex in them. You will see, when we discuss the physiology of a woman, that the clitoris is related to the penis.
You may find that not only your breasts, but also your testes feel tender. You may consider wearing protection for your testes when taking part in sport. However, sports injuries to the testes are rare. If it makes you feel safer and more comfortable, you could wear tight, bikini-type underpants. These give enough protection without chafing your groin or stopping you from moving comfortably.
About being hairy
A good self-image is very important and many teenagers are obsessed with this. This can lead to sessions of self-examination in front of the mirror and comparing yourself with your friends, and is not restricted to the appearance of your sexual organs. There is, for example, the hair (or lack of it) on your chest.
Don’t get upset if you don’t develop hair on your chest. Masculinity doesn’t depend on a hairy chest and it isn’t measured by how thickly it grows. Like father, like son – physical characteristics such as your build and hairiness are largely hereditary and there isn’t much you can do about them.
Men are hairier than women – and some men have more hair than others. But you don’t have to feel inferior if you are not as hairy as your friends.
Like other physical changes in your teens, facial hair develops as a result of the working of testosterone, the male sex hormone. A heavy beard, however, is not a measure of masculinity. Growing or shaving off of beards depends on changing fashions. Perhaps you dream of having a moustache, sidies or a goatee beard, but you’ll have to be patient – your beard is still too sparse and you will have to wait until the full force of testosterone kicks in.
The shaving ritual
You can be sure that the long-awaited moment in every boy’s life – when you first draw a razor over your face – is just around the corner. When you eventually start shaving, it will be the start of a ritual that most men repeat every day of their lives. Growing up brings extra responsibilities and routine.
Initially you shouldn’t need to shave too often. Don’t be in a hurry to start. Once you do, your beard will quickly harden and grow faster. But don’t put off shaving until you look like your little sister’s teddy bear.
You’ve probably watched your dad and other men pulling faces in front of the mirror to ensure they get a smooth shave, without cutting themselves. There are two basic methods of shaving: dry and wet. The latter involves wetting the face, applying shaving cream and removing the beard with strokes of a razor. Twin-blade razors are very popular these days. For dry shaving, you need an electric razor that uses either batteries or mains power.
Don’t panic if you cut yourself during your first attempt at shaving. It’s easy to stop the bleeding with a piece of cotton wool or toilet paper. Practice makes perfect. Minor cuts may bruise deeper pimples, but this shouldn’t cause ugly or permanent scars.
Before you buy a dud razor, ask advice from your father or another older man. Who knows, perhaps you’ll even get one as a gift!
There is also a wide range of shaving foams to choose from: the kind applied with a brush, or shaving foam or gel in a can. To save money, many men use ordinary soap. It helps if you shower