Journey of a Cotton Blossom. Jennifer Crocker-Villegas
out like an electric current of pure rage. It flowed from his body through the whip onto her stripped back, over and over again. Everything that had ever happened to him was projected out onto the tender flesh of this helpless woman.
As the woman screamed out in sheer pain, Joseph felt the release of all his emotions departing through her mouth as cries of agony. He had never felt so exhilarated and sickened all at the same time. He stopped himself just short of pure insanity while her blood dripped off of his hands and arms.
The senator walked off with a grin full of pure evil.
The woman was weak, with blood dripping off her sides and forming bloody streams in the sand. Then, with anger, feelings of betrayal, and bravery, she turned her head, looking over her left shoulder and up at Joseph. Her eyes were soaked from tears and laced with pure disgust. “Didn’t your mama teach you any better?” she said in a frail voice.
It was in that moment that the light shattered through, and it all rushed back to him in an instant. It exposed the memories of why he had left the Kingsleys’ house, why he had come here in the first place, and how that beating from Richard Kingsley had given him the courage to try and change it all. He was supposed to be helping himself and others, not turning into this monster he had become.
As the woman stared at him with disgust and hurt in her eyes, he saw a familiar glimmer, and he felt something strange. As quickly as the rage had come, it dispersed, and his knees gave out as he almost fainted. He fell to the ground with his body shaking uncontrollably. All the while, the little boy inside of him screamed with fury and wrath because of what he had done. He grabbed his face and started to cry in agony, smearing her blood all over him. He thrust himself forward so that he, too, was on all fours. He dry heaved and vomited; each splash of sickness sprayed dust and a spatter of her blood back in his face. He looked up at her with tears rushing down his cheeks. They left streaks where they had washed away the dust and blood. Snot was streaming out of his nose and pouring off his upper lip onto the sandy floor. Vomit-filled saliva dangled out of his mouth from his pouting bottom lip. He looked at her with defeat in his eyes and uttered, “Mama?”
Joseph was in sheer shock, disgust, and horror of what he had done. With tears, vomit, and his mother’s blood covering his face, he began to punch himself brutally. It was one blow after another on his cheekbone, which was beginning to collapse. His mother reached up to grab his arm.
“No, son! Stop it! Stop it!”
Joseph again fell to his knees and screamed. It was a scream that shook the ground and bellowed all his raw emotions. “I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry, Mama! How could I do this to my own mama? I deserve to die!”
Joseph began to punch himself again. He knew it was what he deserved. Claudia was crying as she reached for Joseph’s arm.
“Son, please don’t hurt yourself. You don’t deserve this.”
“Yes, I do. I don’t deserve to live.”
“Son, please, you got to forgive yourself. I forgive you.”
Claudia reached over to him with her arms open, and Joseph crumbled into them.
When Claudia realized this was her son, she forgave him instantly. She knew this was not his real character, and she believed he had been misled and brainwashed by the depraved senator. The son she had been longing for, year after year, was finally in front of her. She had wished better for him, but she was nonetheless ecstatic to finally be with him. Joseph was happy, too, even if he couldn’t enjoy it at that moment.
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