The Golden Fool. Робин Хобб
he would have come to me to explain if he had? He and his mother did not know about … the cat. They were not even aware I was Witted when they gave her to me. Oh, my little cat.’ His voice suddenly faltered on his last words, and I knew how all his thoughts had diverted to the loss of his Wit-partner.
The chill grief of his loss blew through his words. It stirred my own loss of Nighteyes to a sharper ache. I felt as if I were probing a wound as I asked relentlessly, ‘Then why did they do it? It must have seemed a strange request. Someone comes to them and gives them a hunting cat and says, “Here, give this to the Prince”. And they’ve never said who gave it.’ He took a breath, then stopped. ‘Civil spoke to me in confidence. I don’t know if I should break that trust.’
‘Did you promise not to tell?’ I demanded, dreading the answer. I needed to know what Civil had told him, but I would not ask him to break his promise.
An incredulous look came over Dutiful’s face. ‘Tom Badgerlock. A noble does not ask his prince to “promise not to tell”. It would not be appropriate to our station.’
‘And this conversation is,’ the Fool observed wryly. His comment made the Prince laugh, easily dispersing a building tension between us that I had not been aware of until the Fool disarmed it. Strange, suddenly to recognize his gift for doing that, after all the years I had known him.
‘I see your point,’ the Prince conceded easily, and now the conversation included all of us as we rode three abreast. For a short time, the steady clopping of the horses’ hooves and the whispering of the cool wind were the only sounds. Dutiful took a breath. ‘He did not ask me to promise. But … Civil humbled himself to me. He knelt at my feet to offer his apology. And I think any man who does that has a right to expect it will be kept from the public gossip.’
‘It would not become public gossip through me, my prince. Nor through the Fool. I promise. Please tell me what passed between you.’
‘The fool?’ Dutiful turned a delighted grin on Lord Golden.
Lord Golden snorted contemptuously. ‘An old joke between old friends. One that is becoming far too worn to be humorous any more, Tom Badgerlock,’ he added warningly to me. I ducked my head to his rebuke, but smirked also, hoping the Prince would accept the hasty explanation. Inside my chest, my heart sank down to the pit of my belly as I castigated myself for my carelessness. Did some part of me long to reveal myself to the Prince? I felt an old familiar twist in my gut. Guilt. Secrets withheld from ones who trusted me. Had not I once promised myself never to do that again? But what choice did I have? I guarded my own secret even as Lord Golden worked at prying the Prince’s secret loose from him.
‘But if you would tell us, I promise that my tongue will wag it no further. Like Tom, I am dubious of Civil Bresinga’s loyalty to you, as friend or subject. I fear you may be in danger, my prince.’
‘Civil is my friend,’ the Prince announced in a voice that brooked no argument. His boyish confidence in his own judgement cut me. ‘I know that in my heart. However,’ and here a strange look flickered over Dutiful’s face, ‘he warned me to be wary of you, Lord Golden. He seems to regard you with … extreme distaste.’
‘A small misunderstanding between us when I guested at his home,’ Lord Golden demurred casually. ‘I am sure we will soon resolve it.’
I rather doubted that myself but the Prince seemed to accept it. He pondered for a time, turning his horse to the west and skirting the edges of the forest. I manoeuvred Myblack to put myself between Dutiful and possible ambushers hiding amongst the trees. I tried to keep one eye on the woods and one on the Prince. When I spotted a crow in a nearby treetop, I wondered sourly if it were a Piebald spy. Little I could do if it were, I told myself. Neither of the others seemed to take notice of the bird. The Prince’s words broke from him just as the bird rose cawing from the trees and flew away.
Dutiful’s words came reluctantly. ‘The Bresingas were threatened. By the Piebalds. Civil would not say how, only that it was very oblique. The cat was delivered to his mother with a note, directing her to give the cat to me as a gift. If she did not, well, reprisal was threatened, but Civil didn’t tell me exactly what.’
‘I can guess,’ I said bluntly. The crow had disappeared from sight. It did not make me feel any more secure. ‘If they didn’t give the cat to you, one of them would be betrayed as Witted. Probably Civil.’
‘I think that is likely,’ Dutiful conceded.
‘That doesn’t excuse it. She had a duty to her prince.’ Privately I resolved to find a way to spy on Bresinga’s room. A quiet visit to it and a search through his possessions might also be a good idea. I wondered if he had brought his cat with him.
Dutiful gave me a very direct look and he seemed to speak with Verity’s bluntness as he asked me, ‘Could you put your duty to your monarch ahead of protecting a member of your own family? That is what I asked myself. If my mother were threatened, what could I be forced to do? Would I betray the Six Duchies for the sake of her life?’
Lord Golden shot me a Fool’s glance, one that was well pleased with this boy. I nodded to it, but felt distracted. Dutiful’s words itched at me. I suddenly felt as if there were something important I needed to remember but could not trace the thought any further. I could not think of an answer to Dutiful’s question either, so the silence lengthened. At last I said, ‘Be careful, my prince. I caution you against taking Civil Bresinga into your confidence, or making his friends your own.’
‘There is little to fear there, Badgerlock. I’ve no time for friends right now; all is duty. It was hard for me to wrench this hour out of my schedule and say that I would go riding with only the two of you. I have been warned that it will look odd to the Dukes, whose support I must court. Far better had I ridden out with some of their sons accompanying me. But I needed this time with you. I’ve something important to ask you, Badgerlock.’ He paused, then asked bluntly, ‘Will you come to my betrothal ceremony tonight? If I must endure this, I’d like to have a true friend nearby.’
I immediately knew the answer, but I tried to look as if I were pondering it. ‘I cannot, my prince. It would not be fitting to one of my station. It would look even odder than this riding out together.’
‘Could not you be there as Lord Golden’s bodyguard?’
Here Lord Golden himself intervened for me. ‘That would appear as if I did not trust my prince’s hospitality to protect me.’
The Prince pulled in his horse, a stubborn look coming over his face. ‘I want you to be there. Find a way.’
This direct command set my teeth on edge. ‘I’ll consider it,’ I replied stiffly. I was still not completely confident of my anonymity at Buckkeep. I wanted to settle more firmly into my role as Tom Badgerlock before I had any more chance confrontations with folk who might recall me from the past. There would be many of them at the betrothal ceremony tonight. ‘But I wish to point out to my prince that even if I am present, conversing with you will be out of the question. Nor should you take any sort of an interest in me that might call undue attention to our connection.’
‘I’m not a fool!’ he retorted, very close to anger at my indirect refusal. ‘I simply would like to have you there. To know I had one friend in the crowd of those watching me being sacrificed.’
‘I think you are being overly dramatic,’ I said quietly. I tried not to let it sound like an insult. ‘Recall that your mother will be there. And Chade. And Lord Golden. All people with your best interests at heart.’
He reddened a bit as he glanced at Lord Golden. ‘I do not discount your value as a friend, Lord Golden. Forgive me if my words were ill considered. As for my mother and Lord Chade, they are, like me, obliged to duty before love. They want what is best for me, that is true, but the largest facet of that is always what is best for my reign. They see the well-being of the Six Duchies as intrinsic to my own well-being.’ He looked suddenly weary. ‘And when I disagree, they say that when I have been King for a time, I will understand that what they obliged me to do was actually in my own best interests as well.