Unraveling The Past. Elisabeth Rees
did I do this time?” she asked. “Did I fail to lace up my sneakers with a safe and secure double knot?” She knew she was being childish, but Tyler often hit a nerve.
He pointed down the quiet road. “Crusher was there at the motel.”
Joanna flung a hand up to her face. “What? Crusher? Where?”
“He was in a car in the parking lot, just sitting there, watching.”
She felt sure she had scanned the area thoroughly. “Are you sure? I took a good look around.”
“No, you didn’t,” Tyler said, raising his voice. “You think you were on your guard, but in reality, you were unfocused and sloppy. At one point I actually thought you were enjoying the dangerous situation.”
Joanna shrugged. “I wasn’t enjoying it,” she said, feeling the need to defend herself. “But neither was I scared. I thought bravery was a good attribute to have.”
“Being brave is not about being gung ho,” Tyler said, speaking quietly and slowly, as if trying to contain his irritation. “It’s about being able to defend yourself properly. Crusher was right there in front of us, and you didn’t see him because you were caught up in the moment. He could have fired on you or pursued us or tried to run us down.”
“But he didn’t,” she argued.
“And that’s probably because there were two police cars sitting only yards away from him.” She could see Tyler’s frustration bubbling. “We were fortunate this time. Crusher has no idea what direction we took from the highway. You should always remember that bravery is not the same as recklessness.”
She smiled.
“Did I say something funny?” Tyler asked, crossing his arms.
“You said those exact same words to me seven months ago,” she replied. “Right before I went undercover with The Scorpions. You didn’t want me to take the job. You said I wasn’t ready for an assignment like that.” His lack of belief in her abilities still hurt deeply. “You tried to persuade me to wait until I’d undergone more intensive training before agreeing to any undercover work.”
He raised his eyebrows. “I can see why I would say that.”
She crossed her arms, mirroring his defensive stance. They were going over old ground, yet for Tyler it was brand-new.
“Your objections to my assignment were vetoed by the Southern Missouri Drug Task Force,” she said defiantly. “And I did a good job of being an undercover officer, no matter how little faith you have in me.”
He sighed, no doubt guessing he had perhaps come down a little hard on her. “I’m sorry. You put yourself in the line of fire on a very important assignment, and you deserve far more than criticism. Well done, Deputy Graham. I’m proud of you, despite my objections to your style of working.”
She tried so hard not to smile, but it was impossible. Praise from Sheriff Beck was hard to earn, and she basked in its warm glow.
“Thank you, Tyler. I appreciate you saying that.”
He checked his watch. “We’re heading into Tennessee where a buddy of mine is going to meet us and help us out. If we avoid the interstate and major highways, we should be okay, but please try to stay alert. If you see anything, and I mean anything, that concerns you, tap me on the shoulder, okay?”
Joanna placed a hand over her rumbling stomach. She was famished. “Okay.”
“I’ll stop along the way to get us some food,” he said. “But let me do the talking. I don’t want you mess...” He stopped. “Just let me do the talking.”
She slid her helmet over her head, knowing the exact content of Tyler’s unfinished sentence. The scant praise from Sheriff Beck was short-lived. He had placed himself in charge again, and she was back to being the wild card.
* * *
The log cabin in the Meeman-Shelby Forest State Park was perfect, set in beautiful dense woodland, far from any neighboring properties. The forest was spectacular, with a mixture of oaks, American beech, hickory and sweet gum. At any other time, Tyler would be incredibly excited to explore their temporary new environment. But this wasn’t a vacation. This was a hideaway.
Tyler pushed his motorcycle inside the garage around back. Joanna watched him with steely eyes, sipping from a bottle of water they’d picked up from a large store in the town of Millington, along with some food provisions and ladies’ clothes. Joanna had discarded her neon pants and bright purple sweatshirt and chosen some blue jeans and warm sweaters that would allow her to blend in better. The store in Millington had been full of Christmas shoppers with laden carts, perusing the aisles to the sound of festive songs. The children lining up to meet Santa added to the noisy excitement in the air. Tyler and Joanna must have looked like any regular couple, doing last-minute shopping, and, for a little while, he wished it were true. Spending Christmas in the bosom of your own family was a blessing that many failed to appreciate. Since his grandmother had died, the holidays were mainly lonely and painful, at least those he could recollect. Yet with Joanna by his side, the pain eased a little. The pretense of being a happy couple at Christmas was too much to resist.
His forced his thoughts to return to their immediate situation. He had already scouted out the cabin and the surrounding area, leaving him satisfied that this was the safest place they could possibly be. His earlier heated exchange with Joanna had given him a better understanding of why their relationship hadn’t worked out. She truly was hotheaded and impetuous, whereas he was meticulous and measured. He smiled to himself, imagining how she must have driven him crazy—how she still drove him crazy. Yet a lingering feeling of affection for her remained, and he knew that she must have gotten under his skin.
Joanna had said very little while shopping, only asking questions after he had taken a call from Ed, informing them that the cabin had been opened up by a naval officer and was ready for them to inhabit. Their Dark Skies buddy, Dillon Randall, had arranged for the property to be at their disposal until it was required by navy personnel, which wouldn’t be for a good while yet. Tyler was beyond grateful. He closed his eyes and said a brief thank you to God for providing them with avenues of help at every turn.
Joanna obviously saw his prayer. “Put in a good word for me, will you?” she said with a strangled laugh. “I need it.”
He opened his eyes. She had tried to disguise her misery with humor, but he saw through it in an instant. “You’re feeling a little lost, huh?”
“You could say that.” She suddenly seemed more vulnerable. “I think God forgot about me somehow.”
Tyler walked over to her and sat on the porch step, leaning forward with his forearms on wide apart knees. “God never forgets about anybody,” he said softly, watching his breath swirl in the coolness of the air. “Did you ever read that poem about footprints in the sand? When you see only one set of footprints, that’s when the Lord carries you.”
A sound rushed from her mouth, like a sob, but she quickly turned it into a snort. “Carries me?” she said with incredulity. “Wow, if this is how it feels to be carried, then I’d hate to know how it feels to be put down again.”
He couldn’t help or counsel Joanna unless he knew more about her, and they had another few hours to wait for Ed to arrive, so he wanted to use it wisely.
“Tell me about yourself,” he said. “I’d like to know you.”
She smiled. “You know me already. You just forgot all of it.”
“Exactly,” he said. “So tell me again.”
She sat on the step next to him. The late-afternoon sun was pleasantly warming, and it lit up Joanna’s face with an orange glow. She really was beautiful, with smooth, clear skin and an expressive face, framed by a mass of deep brown hair. Yet he couldn’t see any joy in her heart.
She took a deep breath and stared into the woods beyond. “I grew up on