Sydney Harbour Hospital: Lexi's Secret. Melanie Milburne
‘Oh, I hang out here a lot,’ she said, shifting her weight from one high heel to the other. ‘My sister Bella’s in and out for treatment all the time. She’s been in for the last couple of weeks. Another chest infection. She’s on the transplant list but we have to wait until it clears. The chest infection, I mean.’ Lexi knew she was rambling but what else could she do? Five years ago she had thought they’d had a future together. Their connection had been sudden but intense. She had dreamed of sharing her life with him and yet without notice Sam had cut her out of his life coldly and ruthlessly, not even pausing long enough to say goodbye. Seeing him again with no notice, no time to prepare herself, had stirred up deeply buried emotions so far beneath the surface she had almost forgotten they were there.
Almost …
‘Sorry to hear that,’ Sam said making a point of glancing at his silver watch.
Lexi felt a sinkhole of sadness open up inside her. He couldn’t have made it clearer he wanted nothing to do with her. How could he be so … so distant after the intense intimacy they had shared? Had their affair meant nothing to him? Nothing at all? Surely she was worth a few minutes of his precious time in spite of the different paths their lives had taken? ‘I didn’t know you were back from wherever you went,’ she said. ‘I heard you got a scholarship to study overseas. Where did you go?’
‘America,’ he said flatly.
She raised her eyebrows, determined to counter his taciturn manner with garrulous charm. ‘Wow, that’s impressive,’ she said. ‘The States is so cool. So much to see. So much to do. You must’ve been the envy of all the other trainees, getting that chance to train abroad.’
‘Yes.’ Another frowning glance at his watch.
Lexi’s gaze went to the strongly boned, deeply tanned wrist he had briefly exposed from the crisp, light blue business shirt he was wearing. Her stomach shifted like a pair of crutches slipping on a sheet of cracked ice. Those wrists had once held her much smaller ones in a passionate exchange that had left her body tingling for hours afterwards. Every moment of their blistering two-week affair was imprinted on her flesh. Seeing him again awakened every sleeping cell of her body to zinging, pulsing life. It felt like her blood had been thawed from a five-year deep freeze. It was racing through the network of her veins like a flash flood, making her heart hammer with the effort.
Her gaze slipped to his mouth, that beautiful sculpted mouth that had moved against hers with such heart-stopping skill. She still remembered the taste of him: minty and fresh and something essentially, potently male. She still remembered the feel of his tongue stroking against hers, the sexy rasp of it as it cajoled hers into a sizzling hot tango. He had explored every inch of her mouth with masterful expertise, leaving no corner without the branding heat of his possession.
And yet he had still walked away without so much as a word.
Lexi lifted her gaze back to his. Encountering those unfathomable brown depths made her chest feel like a frightened bird was trapped inside the cage of her lungs. Did he have any idea of the hurt he had caused? Did he have any idea of what she had gone through because of him?
She swallowed in anguish as she thought of the heart-wrenching decision she had made. Would she ever be able to summon up the courage to tell him? But, then, what would be the point? How could he possibly understand how hard it had been for her back then, young and pregnant with no one to turn to? She hadn’t felt ready to become a mother. A termination had seemed the right thing to do and yet …
‘I have to get going,’ Sam said, nodding towards the hospital building. ‘The CEO is expecting me.’
Lexi stared at him as realisation slowly dawned. ‘You’re going to be working here?’ she asked.
‘Yes.’
‘Here at SHH?’
‘Yes.’
‘Not in the private sector?’ she asked.
‘No.’
‘Do you ever answer a question with more than one word?’
‘Occasionally.’
Lexi gave him a droll look but inside she was screaming: This can’t be happening! ‘Why wasn’t I told?’ she asked.
‘No idea.’
‘Wow, that’s two.’
‘Two what?’ he said, frowning.
‘Words,’ she said. ‘Maybe we can work on that a little. Boost your repertoire a bit. What are you doing here?’
‘Working.’
She mentally rolled her eyes. ‘I mean why here? Why not in the private system where you can earn loads and loads of money?’ Why not some other place where I won’t see you just about every day and be reminded of what a silly little fool I was?
‘I was asked.’
‘Wow, three words,’ Lexi said, purposely animating her expression. ‘We’re really doing great here. I bet I can get you to say a full sentence in a month or two.’
‘I have to go now,’ he said. ‘And, yes, that’s five words if you’re still counting.’
She lifted her chin. ‘I am.’
Sam looked into those bluer than blue eyes and felt as if he had just dived into the deepest, most refreshing ocean after walking through the driest, hottest desert for years. Her softly pouting mouth was one of those mouths that just begged to be kissed. He could recall the dewy soft contours under his own just by looking at her. He could even remember the feel of the sexy dart of her tongue as it played catch-me-if-you-can with his. Her platinum-blonde hair was in its usual disarray that somehow managed to look perfectly coiffed and just-out-of-bed-after-marathon-sex at the same time. He felt the rocket blast to his groin as he remembered having her in his bed, up against the wall, over his desk, on a picnic blanket under the stars …
Stop it, buddy, he remonstrated with himself.
She had been too young for him before, and in spite of the years a world of experience separated them now. She was still a spoilt, rich kid who thought partying was a full-time occupation. He was on a mission to save lives that were dependent on transplant surgery.
Other people had to die in order for him to give life to others. He was always aware of that. Someone lost their life and by doing so he was given the opportunity to save another. He didn’t take his responsibility lightly. He had worked long and hard for his career. It had defined his life. He had given up everything to get where he was now. He could not afford, at this crucial time in his journey, to be distracted by a party girl whose biggest decision in life was whether to have floating candles or helium balloons at a function.
He had to walk away, just as he had before, but at least this would be his choice, made of his own free will.
‘You dented my car.’ It was not the best line he could have come up with but he had just taken delivery of the damned vehicle. To him it just showed how irresponsible she was. She hadn’t even looked as she’d flung open her door. It was just so typical of her and her privileged background. She had no idea how hard people had to work to get things she took for granted. She had been driven around in luxury cars all of her life. She didn’t know what it felt like to be dirt poor with no funds available for extras, let alone the essentials.
Just take his mother, for instance. Stuck on a long transplant list and living way out in the bush to boot, his mother had died waiting for a kidney. His working-class parents hadn’t had the money to pay for private health cover. They hadn’t even had the money to afford another child after him. He knew what it felt like to want things that were so out of your reach it was like grasping at bubbles, hoping they wouldn’t burst when your fingers touched them. In his experience they always burst.
Lexi was another bubble that had burst.
‘You call that a dent?’