Reunited By Their Baby. Jennifer Taylor
contact made her skin tingle and her blood heat.
‘It’s my shout. I invited you, don’t forget.’
Callum dismissed her offer to pay her share with a shake of his head. Beth was sorely tempted to argue with him but she decided that it wasn’t worth it. She needed to keep things on an even keel and not allow emotions to get in the way. She placed her bag back on the floor, taking care not to touch him this time.
‘Have you left Beatrix with the childminder?’
She jumped when he shot the question at her. ‘Well, I certainly haven’t left her at home on her own,’ she replied tartly.
‘I didn’t think you had,’ Callum said quietly. ‘I was only asking, Beth. I wasn’t having a go at you.’
‘No. Of course not. Sorry.’ Beth flushed, knowing that she had been far too sharp with her answer. She took a quick breath to calm herself but her nerves were jangling. It wasn’t easy being with Callum like this but she had to try to maintain some kind of a balance. ‘I left her with Alison Lewis. One of the mums I met at my antenatal classes recommended her and she’s very nice—she has a real affinity with the children she minds.’
‘I remember her from when I last worked here,’ Callum said thoughtfully. ‘Doesn’t she have twins, a boy and a girl?’
‘That’s right—Molly and Max. They’re three now and Beatrix adores them. She was so excited when I dropped her off this morning because she knew they’d be there to play with.’
‘Good. It must make it easier if you know that she’s happy,’ he observed.
‘It does,’ Beth agreed, somewhat surprised by his astuteness. ‘I have to admit that it was a wrench to leave her but she didn’t seem the least bit worried. She was more interested in playing with the other children than in the fact that Mummy was leaving her!’
‘It sounds as though she’s got loads of confidence,’ Callum said with a smile.
‘Oh, she has. She’s just like you in that respect.’ The words rushed out before she could stop them and she saw an expression of pain cross Callum’s face.
‘I wish I could see her, Beth. Oh, I know you need time to decide what you intend to do but it would mean such a lot if I could see her.’ He stared down at his hands. ‘After I received your letter telling me you were pregnant, I spent hours wondering if you’d had a little boy or a little girl. Then ever since I found out she was a girl, I’ve spent even more time imagining what she looks like.’
He suddenly looked up and Beth felt a lump come to her throat when she saw the yearning in his eyes. ‘I mean, is she blonde like you or dark like me? Does she have brown eyes or hazel? At the moment she’s just this shadowy little figure who I can’t picture clearly and I can’t tell you how much it would mean to me to just see her, touch her, smell her even. Then I’ll really feel that she’s my daughter.’
Callum hadn’t meant to let his emotions get the better of him. On the contrary, he’d been determined to project a calm front. However, thinking about the daughter he had never seen had let loose a host of feelings, most of which he had never expected to experience. He had never yearned for a child of his own, never longed to procreate even when he and Beth had been trying so hard to have a baby. But now that his daughter was a fact, he found it impossible to take a step back from her.
‘Here. I have some photos of her on my phone.’
He jumped when Beth pressed her phone into his hand. He stared at the screen, feeling his emotions multiply a hundredfold as he looked at the fair-haired moppet smiling up at him. She had Beth’s colouring and his eyes. She also had his nose if he wasn’t mistaken.
Words failed him as he flicked through the photos, one after the other. They were a record of his daughter’s life to date, the first one taken straight after her birth and the last one only a couple of days ago. All those months that had passed without him being there, he thought wretchedly. All that time during which she had grown up and he had known nothing about her existence.
How he longed to turn back the clock, to have been there for her from the very first moment, but it was impossible. He could never recapture that precious time he’d lost; all he could do was to make sure that he was there for the rest of her life. The thought stiffened his resolve, made him see just how important this was to him. He wasn’t going to give up. Even if Beth refused his pleas then he would find a way to maintain contact with his daughter.
‘She’s beautiful,’ he said, reluctantly relinquishing the phone. ‘She has your colouring and my eyes.’
‘Yes.’ Beth bit her lip and he could sense her hesitation before she hurried on. ‘I think she has your nose as well, although babies change so quickly that it’s hard to be certain. One minute they look like one parent and the next they look like the other.’
‘It must be fascinating, seeing all the changes,’ he said, struggling to control the emotions that kept welling up inside him. He cleared his throat when he saw Beth glance at him, not sure if he felt comfortable about laying himself bare this way. It would have been different if they’d still been together; he wouldn’t have felt nearly as self-conscious then. But they were no longer together, no longer involved apart from through their child, and he needed to protect himself.
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